If she couldn’t hear the hiss of Lane’s spell and the deputies’ curses as they fought against what had to be a master assassin who’d disguised himself as a skinny boy, Alyssa might have been fooled by the little girl. As it was, she wasn’t taking any chances. There was no telling what was hiding in that tiny body.

And those eyes. They belonged to a stray animal, not a child who didn’t reach her waist.

It suddenly occurred to her that she was in the home of a summoner. The things she thought were children might not be. The thought spurred her tension to another level and a ball of flame appeared in her hand. “I swear to the saints—”

“I was wondering who knocked down my door.”

Alyssa looked up…and immediately wished she hadn’t. Walking down the stairs like a princess announced at a royal ball was Lourianne Tome. The silky robe she wore was at least two sizes too small and the loose knot of its ties meant every sway of her hips threatened to reveal more than Alyssa wanted to see. Unfortunately, she couldn’t avert her gaze as it would mean taking her eyes off the little devil that looked like she wanted to gouge her eyes out. She had to settle for a scowl.

Lou smiled as she came off the last step. “It turned out to be Miss Alyssa. I like the…aggressive entrance.”

The girl’s words practically dripped with suggestion. She didn’t know Lou well but each consecutive time they met, Alyssa felt she became more shameless. Their genders aside, she couldn’t help feeling unnerved having someone a third of her age, and married at that, try to seduce her so openly.

Maybe an infinitely small part of her, one so small she could easily be imagining it, found it flattering that someone married to Kierra would also be interested in her. A part that had no sway on her decision making. Unlike her rapidly growing anxiety that had her on the edge of dousing the room in fire.

“Oi, Tome girl. You need to start explaining things right now. No, first, call off that monster outside.” If she couldn’t, then Alyssa would know something was wrong.

“Monster?”

“Fuck! Look outside.”

Brows slightly furrowed in confusion, Lou walked toward the door, cracking it open. Alyssa heard her cough in surprise, before clearing her throat. “Earl, that’s enough. See our guests in.”

She stepped away from the door wearing a sheepish smile. “It seems my steward has caused a bit of trouble for you. You can hardly blame him, barging in the way you did. A bit boorish, hm? Don’t worry, I like brash women too. Look at my wife, ha!”

“I wish you wouldn’t joke.” It made her feel ridiculous taking the situation so seriously.

The door opened and the steward trooped in with his head bowed. His immaculate appearance was ruined, his violet uniform torn, burned, and shredded. Half of his left pants leg was gone and his dark hair was tousled, obscuring his eyes.

The deputies that followed him were in better shape but looked haggard, which was still embarrassing. Especially since they hadn’t managed to subdue a single boy. They could all feel her glare and tactfully avoided her gaze. Lane went as far as to hunch his shoulders and put the other deputies between them.

“My lady…”

“Alright, what’s this?” Alyssa got her wish. Lou was no longer smiling as she beckoned her steward to her. She took in his appearance with a slight frown. “What happened?”

“I wasn’t able to follow your order to not be disturbed,” the boy said softly, as if reporting a bad evaluation from his tutor to his mother.

As the situation calmed down, Alyssa realized her situation was quite bad. Her people had ganged up on a young boy after he asked them to leave while she burst into the house, magic blazing, only to find that the boy hadn’t been lying and there really wasn’t a threat. She still felt justified but not finding a threat made things…tricky. She felt slightly nauseous knowing she might have to do some groveling to the young noble to avoid a bigger incident.

“Miss Alyssa, I didn’t know you liked bullying children.” After Earl finished his story, Lou turned her attention toward the instructor, clearly unhappy. “Care to explain? Before I draw my own conclusions.”

“You’re the one who needs to do the explaining. Why does your home look like a small battlefield?”

“I don’t believe I’m obliged to explain my private affairs. I wish someone would have explained that a little re-decorating would give people the idea they are welcome to break down my door whenever they damn well please."

Alyssa frowned at the cold tone. A creak made her eyes snap to the stairs and she saw one of the girl’s elementals lightly coming down, long tail slowly whipping through the air. The sensible thing to do would be to de-escalate the situation. After all, if the young boy guarding her front door was most likely an orphan trained by one of the dark guilds, there was no telling what the thing pulled from another realm, a known shapeshifter, was hiding under that delicate façade.

However, she knew a challenge when she saw one and she’d die before she let a brat intimidate her. “If you want to blast giant holes in your walls without people thinking you’re fighting for your life, maybe put a sign in your yard. Oh, that would have been ashes too. Guessing that was your work.”

“The situation demanded it.” To Alyssa’s relief, not that she’d ever admit it, Lou’s shoulders relaxed as she sighed. “It’s a good thing it was you, Miss Alyssa. I doubt I’d be so understanding if it were anyone else.”

“You mean if it wasn’t a woman you fancied.”

The girl had the gall to smile. “Guilty as charged but my wife tells me it’s a good thing I’m easy to please, haha!” The smile dimmed. “Seriously though, never do this again. I’m not joking. If anyone else had walked through the door…”

She didn’t have to say the words. They would have been dead. Alyssa was a little surprised to feel subdued killing intent from her, the kind of pressure only someone who had taken lives and had no problem doing it again could emit. “If a disturbance happens—”

“If there is a problem that can’t be solved between me and my wife, an instructor and her lackeys aren’t going to be able to do a saints damn thing. You’d be better off running for Dunwayne if you’re really concerned.”

The instructor grunted in response, unable to contradict her. “Yeah, well, take it up with the big boss. Right now, I need to clear the house. Are you going to call off your dogs?” Her gaze moved to Earl, then to Anna, before pointedly stopping on Geneva.

Lou walked over to the little girl and put a hand on the haystack someone might mistake for hair. Her low growling stopped and she looked at her benefactor with wide eyes. Lou smiled indulgently and pat her head a few times before ushering her toward her steward. “Earl, clean yourself up and get yourselves something sweet. You both deserve it. Anything else can wait for tomorrow.”

“As you say.”

The air loss quite a bit of its tension as the boy took his sister’s hand and led her into the kitchen. Her deputies finally relaxed as their opponent disappeared, the tension leaving their bodies.

“Miss Alyssa, I assume you won’t be happy until you see my wife and our bedroom?”

“At least.”

“Then let’s get this over with. Your dogs can stay downstairs. I’m not sure if they’re housebroken.”

Alyssa scoffed, her lips turning up a little bit. “Fair.”

“Ah, Boss…”

She sneered at the visibly disappointed Lane and the other deputies who worked to keep their wishes off their faces. The bastards couldn’t even do their jobs and they still wanted the benefits? For a moment, she wished she was once again in a knight order. If she was, she could beat the idiots to her heart’s content. As a law-abiding instructor of the Grand Hall, the most she could do was sneer at them as she moved toward the stairs. “Sit. Good dogs.”

“You don’t have to say it like that,” Lane said with a sigh.

“I suggest you listen,” she heard Lou say behind her. “This servant won’t be as easy to handle as a young boy. Move from this room and you die.”

Her tone held finality and garnered reluctant respect from the instructor as they ascended the steps. Lou slid ahead of her and Alyssa had to point her gaze toward the ceiling to see something she shouldn’t, cursing the perverted girl in her mind as she did.

“Our bedroom. Please, inspect it at your leisure.”

Alyssa stepped through as Lou held the door and immediately froze. She wouldn’t have known if there was a dragon in the room let alone a threat as all of her attention was immediately occupied by the naked elf lying on the bed. Her hand snapped up but not fast enough. She could still see everything on the back of her eyelids. Alyssa let out a stream of curses before shouting, “What the fuck is wrong with you two perverts?!”

“You’re the one who insisted on seeing my bedroom without caring about what you were interrupting.” Lou laughed. “Want to see the bath too?”

Alyssa debated setting the whole house ablaze. With a hiss of annoyance, she settled for not removing the hand over her eyes before she left the house.

“Oh? Is that Ally?” Kierra called in a husky voice. “How unexpected. You’re very welcome, of course.”

“Thanks,” she replied drily. “I’ll settle for an explanation.”

“Miss Alyssa thought we’d been attacked,” Lou replied in a similarly sarcastic tone.

“Yes, I heard the commotion. If you like, we can do joint training for your…dogs. It’s quite embarrassing having your hunting hounds played with by a pup.”

“Not so much if you’ve been working with him.” She might have to go easier on her deputies if so.

Kierra had a pure physical affinity. Nothing related to the mysteries of life and the body were beyond her reach. The elf had never confirmed it, but rumors circulating through the higher circles said she could be one of the famed melders, able to rebuild a man into a god. If she did dabble in the art, she’d be unparalleled. It would explain why someone so young he probably didn’t have hair on his balls could compete with several trained acolytes.

“I haven’t put a finger on the boy.”

All of her understanding went down the drain. She resolved herself to make reforms in the Grand Watch. At the very least she’d get them some damn uniforms. “That explanation. And please make it something I can put in my report.”

“Really, making such a big deal out of a little foreplay. The defenders of the Hall are a little too sheltered,” Kierra said with a chuckle.

Foreplay. “…I’m leaving.” And she promised herself to never come back.

“You might want to move that hand before going down the steps!” Lou called as she turned on her heel. Alyssa stumbled but caught the railing, refusing to move her hand. She compromised once she was at the bottom of the steps, glaring at her deputies that stared at her with obvious confusion. “What are you idiots staring at?” she growled. “We’re leaving!”

“One moment,” the thrall called. She disappeared into the kitchen and emerged carrying a bottle of Herbanacle. Alyssa’s mood improved by leaps and bounds as the bottle was placed in her hands. “A small gift for your trouble.”

…well, maybe she could come again. After announcing herself. Give the perverts plenty of time to put it back in their pants.