Qube looked at the Mage Advisor and sanitation-dwelling performer. “Sewer Bard,” she said, feeling a thrill as he turned to look at her. She was actually in charge! “Do you maybe want to go check on your friends in the sewers?”

Sewer Bard looked extremely puzzled.

“Maybe they can help you figure out why you couldn’t pick that lock in Construct Crossroads?” she offered.

“I-that is-you realise they were holding me prisoner?” Sewer Bard said. “For stealing in their territory.”

“Oh.” Qube digested this. “Do you have any friends or family you’d like to go see?”

Sewer Bard gave her a blank look, before suddenly becoming extremely excited.

“For years I have heard tell of an ancient epic saga, the pinnacle of any bard’s achievement! There are rumours that —”

Qube wondered what would happen if she said ‘skip’. She never would, of course, she was far too polite, but what would happen if she did…

“— only the Bardic Archiver of Songs and Stories has any kind of hint as to where the manuscript could be found. Why, if we were to find this scroll, I would become the most famous Bard in all the lands!”

“Oh, that’s amazing!” Qube said, “If you want to go find them, maybe you can chat about where to find your song?”

“They will most likely be at their post, in the library,” Sewer Bard said. “I believe that is where you were heading, kind Healer. Shall I accompany you?”

“I scarcely think she would need your company while in such a sacred place,” Definitely Bad Guy sneered at Sewer Bard. He glanced at Qube. “I would be a much better companion. There are many tomes that only I have access to, due to my privileged position.”

Sewer Bard squared off against Definitely Bad Guy.

“Your sick experimentations have no place within a realm of — oh, she’s gone.”

“What drivel are you — oh.”

Qube sped up her “extremely casual, nothing to see here” power walk away from the two arguing men.

It’s not that she didn’t appreciate their care, she just really, really wanted the chance to do some research before the Chosen One had finished consuming everything in the Royal kitchen. Given the speed with which she’d seen him eat an entire jam jar, she estimated she would have an hour max before he’d stripped the place bare.

Maybe two hours, if he managed to break into an additional wing of the castle. Or if he decided to start arguing with someone. Three hours tops if Sexy Screamy Spider Lady got stuck again.

She was practically running by the time she reached the Royal library. It was gorgeous, with large, fluted columns made of marble. It was very fancy marble, deep green with splotches of white in it, like someone had thrown white into a can of green paint and then swirled it around a bit. Sphinx statues guarded large double wooden doors that swung open to reveal more books than Qube had thought the world could possibly contain. Giant portcullises shone beams of light from the ceiling, with flying buttresses supporting a truly absurd amount of arched windows.

As she dashed into the library she nearly ran into the front desk. Behind it sat a young librarian wearing a severely uncomfortable looking outfit.

“Hello, can you - oops, I’m invisible.” Qube suddenly realised the flaw in her “ditch the others, study alone” plan. The librarian didn’t bat an eye. Qube reached out and tried to examine the map of the library etched onto the table. There were several different sections, with the largest section labeled “RESTRICTED” in red.

Qube looked at the label. Then at the librarian, who couldn’t see her. Then back at the label.

Qube took off running to the restricted section.

“Books-books-books-books,” she chanted, holding her robes so she didn’t trip. She skidded to a stop outside the restricted section. Two other librarians were standing guard outside a large archway that had the word “RESTRICTED” carved above it. There was no doorway, no locks, just a red rope and two people who A) couldn’t see her and B) were wearing extremely tight-looking clothing that wouldn’t allow them to chase her.

This was it! This was her chance!

Qube very gingerly stepped over the red velvet rope. Neither of the librarian guards moved.

She had done it. She was standing in the restricted section of the library! Without permission!

She was a criminal.

Qube started hyperventilating, just a little. No, this was fine! She needed this knowledge to be a better guiding light! To help them fight against any threats they may come across on their journey. Sure, she maybe hadn’t necessarily needed to immediately go to the restricted section, she could have tried other places first, but there just wasn’t enough time.

...She would make sure to bring the Chosen One back to the library and get permission to go to the restricted section. Retroactive permission was still valid. She wasn’t sure how he could get the stern looking librarian at the front desk to agree but she knew that, somehow, he would. Otherwise, Definitely Bad Guy could probably give permission.

She went up to the closest bookshelf and looked at the giant tomes, each throbbing with magic. Mana auras of various colours pulsated around individual books, but the overall impact was like a full-body infusion of power. Her fingers trembled as she traced the spines of the books. None of them had titles written on them, but she felt like she would just know which one would have what she needed.

She stopped on a leather bound book that had a deep purple aura. Curses were kind of purple like, right? She opened it.

Qube slammed the book shut, horrifying images burned into her mind’s eye.

That had been a book much more suited for someone like Definitely Bad Guy. Being a Healer, Qube knew a fair amount about humanoid anatomy, but that… that had been something else entirely.

Swallowing hard, she went over to another thick book, this one spilling with light blue mana. Surely that would be a bit safer, right?

“Mind controlling children is surprisingly easy, if you —”

Nope.

Suddenly Qube noticed a podium in the middle of the floor with a giant book open on it, bathed in golden light. Something told her that this may have something useful in it.

As she approached the book, her hair blew backwards from a mysterious wind. Possibly from so much concentrated mana? She stepped up to it nervously and bent over the open pages. She stared at the strange squiggles in front of her, reached out and flipped the page, then flipped it back.

By the Words, what was this drivel? It was like Sewer Bard had lost all taste and decided to vomit every bad pickup line into a book.

“‘Do you need a [heal]? Because you look like you fell from the heavens, fee-fee-fiddle-dee-dee,’ the incredibly sexy Bard said, and all the wo/men in the room sighed and fainted in ecstasy. ‘Can I nibble on you, because you’re a delicacy, tro-lo-la-la-lo-lee.’ Even the King and Queen fell in love with the Bard at this point.”

Was this… was this the epic saga that Sewer Bard had been going on about? No. This was drivel. Poorly written drivel. Qube tried to lift the book, but it was stuck to the podium. This was supposed to be the utmost achievement for any Bard?

“Then the Bard flexed, and the seams of his shirt popped, causing everyone who had already fainted to go into a coma from which only his kiss could awaken them. It was a hassle, but the Bard was used to this by now. Tra-la-la-hee.”

There was no way she was going to let Sewer Bard see this. It would break his heart. While he may not have been the most tactful of companions, she’d heard his songs. “Fire Solves Everything” was truly moving, and filled with good life advice. He would be utterly crushed to discover that this work he’d apparently been searching for his entire life was just self gratifying nonsense.

“‘Tell us your name, oh great and wonderful Bard!’ the crowds cooed from their comas.”

“Fair Healer, where are you?”

Oh no! Sewer Bard! Qube spun around and hurried back to the red velvet rope. Sewer Bard and Definitely Bad Guy had apparently put aside their differences and were now standing at the entrance to the Restricted section, glaring at each other.

“You cannot even see her, why do you insist on calling her fair?” Definitely Bad Guy sneered.

“I can see her just fine!” Sewer Bard snapped back.

“Since when?” Qube asked from inside the restricted section.

Sewer Bard looked directly at her. He smiled brilliantly and bowed, his giant hat feather scraping the ground as the two librarian guards looked on disapprovingly.

“Ssssh,” the guards hissed in sync. “This is a library.”

“My delicate flower, your dulcet tones have long tickled my ears, but it is not until recently that I have been able to fully gaze upon your visage.”

Qube pondered this deeply. She hadn’t [heal]ed Sewer Bard. Both Sexy Screamy Spider Lady and him had been in the Forbidden Forest temple for the initial discovery of the curse. But it had taken her [heal]ing Sexy Screamy Spider Lady for the arachnid to sight her.

Why, then, could Sewer Bard see her?

She watched as Sewer Bard leaned against the wall, giving one of the librarian guards a smouldering glance.

“I can be as quiet as you want, my hard working librarian. If you’re interested, I can help you with some book binding later.” Sewer Bard whispered.

“You’ve been talking to Sexy Screamy Spider Lady again, haven’t you?” Qube asked flatly. Sewer Bard shot her a sheepish smile.

The librarian guard he was talking to looked at him disapprovingly.

“Sssh,” they both hissed again. “This is a library.”

Given the severe, oddly lumpy-looking clothing they were wearing and their tightly pulled back hair, the two guards resembled nothing more than bespeckled gargoyles. And yet Sewer Bard was acting like the guard he was talking to was the most alluring creature he’d ever laid eyes on.

Could it be that his “inner beauty” sight was growing stronger? It certainly seemed like Sexy Screamy Spider Lady and him had been swapping various pick up lines, and hitting on each other in what Qube could only assume was some kind of romance training. Quite how that would help them save the world she wasn’t sure, but, given the importance of at least some of the visible party members having basic diplomacy skills to help soothe any feathers ruffled by the Chosen One, she wasn’t about to tell them to stop their social schooling.

If Sewer Bard and Definitely Bad Guy hadn’t been so openly antagonistic, she may have suspected they’d been collaborating to help Sewer Bard see through her curse, but as it was it must have been something Sewer Bard had been developing on his own. ...Unless the two men were hiding a deeply passionate love affair under their sniping comments.

Qube narrowed her eyes at Definitely Bad Guy, who was snorting derisively at Sewer Bard’s attempts to chat up the guards. It could be a ploy to make Definitely Bad Guy jealous. She would have to ask Sexy Screamy Spider Lady about this possibility. Preferably after she’d discovered who the Hunter was in love with. And then she’d need to find a way to delicately let Sewer Bard know that Definitely Bad Guy was hopelessly in love with her.

But, given she was far too busy saving the world to have any time for romance, maybe… maybe the kindest thing she could do would be to make sure Definitely Bad Guy focused his attention elsewhere?

“I am always available to whisper sweet nothings to one as enticing as yourself,” Sewer Bard loudly whispered at the very unimpressed guard.

“SSSH, IT’S A LIBRARY!” the two guards yelled.

On the other hand, maybe Definitely Bad Guy could do without that particular kindness.

“Sewer Bard, please leave the guards alone,” Qube sighed, stepping out of the restricted section. “And can we please ask the librarian at the front desk where the books dealing with the biology of all the creatures we are likely to come across are? Also,” she mentally pulled up her to do list, “anything about a place known as Grease, any books they have on the Golden Prophecy, any in-depth essays on the Evil Emperor’s coup, any research on temples, breakdowns on pocket magic, and how to learn [curses].”

She paused for breath. Sewer Bard and Definitely Bad Guy were looking at her with the same blank expression.

“Also, do I need a library card to borrow out books?”