Her private lesson continued a little while longer, as they went over the images and ideas for charms in several useful schools of magic. A little dust devil for wind, a droplet of water, a ball of flame to light candles, and finally a complicated three-dimensional pattern that Cecilia called a “field” that could be used to attract metal. The last one was apparently found by studying lodestones and compasses.

Idelle couldn’t manage to cast most of them. Cecilia had a few minor tips on how different visualizations could adjust the charm’s effects (or even help cast at all), but Idelle got the impression that she really just needed a lot of practice at this point. Cecilia nodded when she brought it up.

“That’s the right attitude to have, for sure. Other people’s theory is helpful, but there’s no substitute for hard work and experimentation. I think you’ll have plenty of time for that, though, as I’m probably going to be a little busy coming up. Sorry.”

Idelle looked at her quizzically. “What is it you do, anyway? Princess isn’t exactly a job title, last time I checked.”

Cecilia laughed. “That’s true enough. Technically, I don’t have any real position in the hierarchy here, I’m just a guest. But in practice I managed to come to an arrangement, shall we say, with the Duke here at Wyrlet. It’s all pretty complicated and boring, but the short of it is that my personal troops are working with the garrison here to conduct an experiment of sorts. Or maybe I should say that they’re proving a hypothesis.”

Something about her voice made Idelle think that there was more to the situation than she was letting on, but she didn’t want to pry too much. “Someone mentioned some of it to me. He made it sound like you were a reformer, I guess?”

“Yeah, that’s a fair way to put it. But in practice, everything costs money and there’s a great deal of organization and logistics involved. Not to mention keeping the Duke happy about the whole thing. It can get pretty hectic.” Cecilia looked at her with a wicked smile. “Fortunately, I have the occasional way to blow off steam.”

Idelle shot her an aggrieved look. “I noticed. Thank you for making time for me, I’m sure.”

“It was my pleasure~”

They said their goodbyes soon after. But the conversation stuck in Idelle’s thoughts despite that. Now that she thought about it, she felt kinda awkward just going with the flow like this. Cecilia really had helped her out a lot, even if she WAS a little bit of a jerk about it. There must be something she could do to help out the other girl’s project.

After all, it seemed like magic wasn’t yet going to provide any easy answers about her situation, or a way to help her amnesia. She sighed. Part of her wanted to just grill Cecilia on blood magic, as that seemed the most relevant, but it felt like such a suspicious line of questioning somehow. She was honestly terrified of how people might react if they found out what she could do. Especially when all she knew about it herself was that it was very much not normal, and might have something to do with blood magic.

Yeah. Better to take it slow. She’d keep practicing magic, and find some way to help Cecilia in the meantime. She didn’t want to be a freeloader, even if the other girl seemed to take some perverse joy in their time together.

In the meantime, back to practice. Despite her struggles, she stubbornly kept at it until long after the sun set, taking only a short break to find another heaping plate of food. By the time she fell asleep, her head felt foggy and she had another mild headache.

…

Idelle stood in a familiar featureless room, her only company a bed and a small table. It felt small, claustrophobic, the walls seeming to close in on her from every side. She turned around, looking for the door.

It wasn’t behind her. She turned around again. Cecilia was there with her. Maybe she’d know.

“Cici, where’s the door?” The princess didn’t reply, only staring at her. “Is there something on my face?”

There was. Something wet was on her cheeks, running over her lips. She reached up with her left hand and touched her face. Her fingers came away smeared with a glossy red, unnaturally bright in the dim room. She stared at it.

Then Cecilia was lunging at her, a shimmering sword in hand. Idelle twisted out of the way, grabbing the other girl’s sword hand and biting into her neck. Something sweet and warm filled her mouth and ran down her throat. Cecilia was laughing hysterically at her as they tumbled onto the ground together, a horrible harsh noise filled with scorn and hatred.

No, that wasn’t right. She was the one laughing. She looked down at the other girl. Only her reflection stared back, eyes wild and manic as she laughed with tears pouring down her face. She sank slowly, still laughing, as fluid poured into her nose and mouth and choked her. Surrounded her. Crushed her. She couldn’t breathe…

She sat up in bed and took a deep shuddering breath as she finally broke free from the nightmare. Her heart was pounding, each pulse sending a wave of painful pressure through her head. She pressed her face into her hands and forced herself to breathe normally despite the way her breath hitched.

Slowly, she calmed down. It was just a dream. It didn’t mean anything. Just a bad dream, that was all. She repeated the words like a mantra. Her heartbeat gradually returned to normal. She was calm, nothing was wrong.

Despite that, it took her what felt like an hour curled into a small ball under the covers until she finally fell back into another fitful night of sleep.

…

The light filling her room finally woke Idelle fully despite the blankets over her face. She stumbled her way out of the bed and wandered over to the window. She’d left the shutters open again, but she realized she kind of appreciated waking up to the light. She took a deep breath of the cold air. Yeah. The nightmares seemed distant now as if they were nothing more than little puddles being evaporated off by the intensifying rays of light. Just bad dreams.

She should worry about things in the real world. Like how to help Cecilia. That was a good thought. She padded downstairs for breakfast and ate with purpose before heading over to Adrian’s office.

She found him behind a desk, carefully reading through a series of official-looking documents. Reports on something or other she supposed. She noticed today that his office had doors adjoining to several adjacent rooms; one was open and she could see a glimpse of another man in uniform studiously filling out forms. A secretary of some kind? Maybe he was the one who delivered clothes and stuff up to her room, she couldn’t imagine the vaguely stuffy Lieutenant doing it himself despite his diligence.

Adrian looked up at her a few moments after she awkwardly came through the door. She winced slightly at his expression; it veritably screamed “Oh great, you again.” But he smoothed his face back out into a pleasant smile before speaking.

“Is there anything else I can help you with, Miss?”

“Yeah, actually. I was wondering if there was anything I could help Her Highness with. Since I’m staying here anyway, and everything.”

She looked at his face for a further reaction, but he seemed merely contemplative at her words. “There’s certainly plenty of work to do. Are you a practiced scribe? Or do you have experience with logistics in some fashion? I wouldn’t have expected it, but…”

Ah. “Um... I don’t think so?”

His face fell at that. “It’s a yes or no question, miss. Do you or don’t you?”

She winced again. “No, I don’t…”

He sighed. “I don’t suppose you have experience as an officer, then? I did hear that you’re reasonably skilled with a sword.”

She really hadn’t thought this through very well, had she? “No, not that either. I don’t actually have any military experience, I guess. But I’ve fought before!”

Adrian seemed to slump slightly lower behind his desk every time she responded. “The rumor did reach me that you’re physically talented, but did you have something specific in mind you felt you could help with? We’re hardly short of soldiers…”

“Ummmm…. I was hoping you could help me with that part?”

He gave her a long look. “I guess you can join the training team participating in beast hunts, if you like. Will that be sufficient for your purposes?”

She twisted awkwardly in place at the undertone of sarcasm in his words. “Yeah, um. Thanks.”

“This is my job, you don’t need to thank me. Go find Sergeant Cateline, she runs hunting drills in the courtyard on the second, fourth, and sixth days of every week at two hours past noon. Tell her you’re joining the hunting team and she’ll place you appropriately. And you can go to her with further needs. Got all that?”

Idelle hesitated. “Once more?”

Adrian was putting a truly stupendous amount of effort into not frowning at her. “Sergeant Cateline, in the courtyard, on the second, fourth, and sixth days at two hours past noon.”

She quickly nodded several times. “Got it, got it. Two, four, and six, at two hours past noon.” She quickly started to flee the room, then paused and turned back around at the door. “Er. What day is it today?”

His response wasn’t even angry, it came in the sad, empty tone of a man who had been completely defeated and knew that the only choice was to accept his fate. “It’s the fourth day of the week.”

Idelle hastily left him to his work.