Shortly after Eliot drifted off that night, Claire was disturbed once more from her place curled up next to him under the covers. This time it was Hollister’s voice breaking into her psyche instead. Though there was no typical greeting, as the first thing she heard was, He’s faltering Claire. When exactly will you be here?

Claire let out a heavy sigh as she glanced over at where Eliot’s breathing told her that he was at least asleep, this time. Faltering how? Do you mean showing signs of going dark, or do you just mean faltering about your idea for him to return to France?

I was hoping you still wished to help, seeing as you were the only one who ever got through to him even before his embrace.

Claire sighed again, well, not long after his embrace, he didn’t seem to need me much anymore.

Hollister was then the one to sigh before replying, are you referring to that human girl he seemed taken with before coming here?

He told you about her? Claire asked, thrown a bit by that fact.

Simply that she looked a lot like you, interestingly enough, he added pointedly, and that she did distract him when you yourself seemed distracted. But now she is long gone, as they all eventually are. They’ll never be to us what we can be to one another. Surely you know that fact by now, Claire.

She swallowed a lump in her throat as she looked down at where that current mortal distraction of her own was lying sleeping next to her. She couldn’t help wondering if Hollister could not only speak with her, but see her as well right at that moment. Who knew what capabilities he could truly have at his age? But she made herself write off his comment as simply having heard about her and “the emperor’s bastard” from Lemuel in recent nights.

I’m sorry Hollister, I’ve found myself helping another at the moment. Hence the delays.

Is this other someone also in danger of becoming an antitribu as powerful as your sire? He asked her pointedly.

No, she had to admit, though gave no further clarification.

Then which do you think is more important? Hollister stated bluntly, before abruptly cutting off their communication and leaving her to think on his unspoken warning.

Claire spent the following hour writing Eliot a slightly tearful note trying to explain that she had meant every word about helping him, and that she honestly didn’t want to leave, but it seemed she had no choice right then. She then softly kissed his forehead and forced herself to leave their peaceful little cabin behind, as much as it hurt her to.

As she made her way to the train station once again, she tried not to think of how much it may hurt him too. Not to mention what damage it could do to whatever progress she had made in getting him past his wariness when it came to intimacy with the fairer sex; especially considering most of that progress had only been made at all, only hours earlier.

The train that transported her from the Black Forest to the French coast took nearly two days due to stops along the way. However the trip across the relatively short expanse of water between France and England did take less than a day. So her entire trip itself to get back to Hollister’s haven once again was approximately three days. But they were three long days, as she couldn’t help worrying about what state Eliot would be in due to her sudden disappearance, after they had grown so close in the three days prior to those she had just spent traveling away from him now, with no real explanation she could share with him. And without being able to stay to even give a real goodbye to him. And she doubted he would easily get past either of those facts.

When she did find herself at the extravagant castle that now belonged to Hollister, and previously to Griffyn, her sadness still had not subsided much at all. Though she still tried to force a smile when Nicolas was the one to greet her in the main hall of the castle.

“Claire, you came” he stated as more of a question than a statement. Though, he looked quickly down as the distance that seemed to now exist between them was immediately obvious.

“I did” she confirmed as she tried to hold that smile and moved slowly to offer him a gentle hug for the first time since the awkward one they had shared prior to his leaving America over two decades earlier.

“But you are not happy to be here” he stated quietly as their short embrace ended. “Your aura is very sad now.”

“Sorry, long trip” she replied in a somewhat broken voice, not looking up at him as she trained her eyes on anything else she could.

“Not that long” he returned softly, before adding, “but you are sad. Sad about Garnet, still, and....” he paused a moment, “and Eliot?” he asked her questioningly.

She immediately looked back up at him then, her guard instantly up, “so Hollister has taught you quite a bit, hasn’t he?”

“I just wanted to understand why you were so sad, if it was because of being with me again, or...”

“Then you could have asked” she told him sharply, her emotions raw at that point, and having him reading her as though she were an open book, was one thing that she didn’t have the strength for right then. Instead, she moved away to go and locate a servant to take her to whatever quarters she would be staying in now that she had been forced to abandon someone who did nothing whatsoever to deserve such treatment; and who would probably never trust her again after being treated to it. Assuming she did ever even see him again, that was.

Claire was more than a bit startled when Hollister himself entered her chambers later that night. “Welcome back to England” he told her quietly.

“Thanks” she said in a near whisper as she turned her attention back to organizing her vanity for the third time that night.

“I hear you were a bit sharp with Nicolas earlier” he began, watching her warily.

“He read me” she stated with that same sharpness in her voice. Though before Hollister could respond to the accusation in her look as well as her tone, “he could go dark, and you taught him one of the most terrible powers any antitribu could ever have. How did you think that was a good idea?” she stated, having to muster an extreme amount of willpower to even express that much disapproval to a Kindred so much older and more powerful than herself.

“He hasn’t gone dark yet, Claire, even if you equate mind-reading with being a villain.”

She tried to force down the glare, but didn’t succeed all that well, “yet” was all she said, as she turned away from him again.

“I’m the one who made you feel guilty enough to come here before you obviously wanted to. Nicolas reading you was an innocent attempt to try and fix whatever you were so upset about. Do you really think snapping at a boy who’s already spent most of his mortal life being cowed is that good of an idea?”

“Did anyone ever actually tell you what your childe, Thomas, did to me? Made me do? And the reason he could do that to me was because of you teaching him that very skill you’re defending now. I think I have the right to be just a bit upset by that” she told him, forcing the will to finish her statement once more.

“Fair point, Claire” he allowed, his tone only softening slightly, “but you were already upset before Nicolas used his power unwisely. That simply magnified what was already there, didn’t it?”

“You reading me now too?”

“Deducing.”

“Whatever. I’m here now, you got what you wanted” she mumbled in a nearly inaudible tone.

“I wanted you to try and continue helping Nicolas. Though that doesn’t seem to be what you want to do, right now.”

Claire shook her head, eyes down, “of course I want to help him, Hollister.” She sighed heavily, “but I didn’t want it to come at the cost of hurting someone else that I wanted to help very much as well” she admitted softly.

“The human boy?” Hollister stated with a sigh as he took a seat.

“Odd how you can say human like it’s a slur. You’re still a Toreador, right?”

“It’s not about looking down on them, Claire. It’s about knowing that trying to be close to them, it never really works. Not for very long. It’s safer to just not let yourself get too close at all, in the major scheme of things.”

“Letting myself get close, letting myself care... It’s what makes me still feel human, Hollister. Hurting them, betraying them: That does the opposite” she whispered with a slight sniffle.

When Claire was interrupted next, the hour was near three in the morning, and it was Nicolas at the door of her chambers then. She sighed after weakly making herself call him into the room. “Yes?” was the only other greeting she managed once he entered, and she continued to look away, just waiting for him to read her again.

“Hollister explained why you were upset with me earlier” was the greeting Nicolas returned, speaking in that unsure tone of his, as always, taking only a few steps closer to where she was now seated at the window, staring out across the London sky outside.

“I can just imagine his version of that explanation” she mumbled, still not looking back as he took a few more tentative steps toward her.

“Can I explain?” he asked her softly, now just a few feet from where she sat. Though that did cause Claire to turn emerald eyes back to him, however briefly.

“Explain what?” she made herself ask.

“Why he taught me to read thoughts at all” Nicolas offered in the same quiet tone.

With a broken sigh, she turned her eyes back to the window, “I’ve already heard the justifications. Sean’s made it abundantly clear why we need to have a skill like that. It doesn’t mean I have to ever enjoy it being used on me though” she had to add, though nearly inaudibly.

“Claire, imagine if you spent your entire life being hurt so badly that you were no longer able to trust anyone, anywhere, any person you ever met. If you were just afraid all the time, that any one of them could hurt you too, at any moment” he swallowed as he looked down, just as Claire did then. He then continued, “if that was how you spent your entire life feeling, then could you ever even try to face eternity without finding some way to stop being afraid of everyone around you, finally?”

Blinking back tears at his reminder of the terrors he had endured, Claire needed a moment to respond, “I do understand Nicolas, why you would want to use something like that to stop being afraid. I do” she stated as she finally looked back at him, “but you used it on me. Have I ever given you a reason to be afraid of me, Nicolas?” she asked him in a whisper.

“No, Claire” he admitted, brown eyes cast down, “I just wanted to stop you from being so sad. The way you did for me, all that time ago.” He took another moment before making himself turn his eyes back to where she still held her own gaze to the floor, “but it seems I did the opposite.”