Well, that was fun. Why did you do that? Were you trying to break the glass or the button?

Fine then, don’t answer me.

Well anyways, the fridge is gone now. Instead, the floor is covered in mud.

...No, that looks too dry and sandy.

Not nearly thick enough, and that one has a piece of grass in it. There is certainly no grass here.

Nnnnnoo… This has too many rocks.

That looks like boiling concrete. Absolutely not what you’re facing.

FAR too dry.

Well… Ok so, this, but without the water buffalo. Or the bank with grass and rocks on it.

Yeah. That’s it.

Ok, well, now that we’ve figured out what the mud you’re in looks like, we can wait a minute what is that in the buffalo’s nose? It kinda looks like that thing they have in their nose in Dune. But then it connects to… headphones? I have no idea. It doesn’t look particularly comfortable. But I guess the buffalo would get used to it after a couple hours. Like a nose ring; once it stops hurting you don’t notice it at all.

Anyways yes. Mud.

It reaches to just above your knees. It’s liquid enough that it isn’t impossible to move through, but it’s still difficult.

You lift your leg carefully, swishing it around in the muck. You dip a finger in it, and sniff it. It smells like dirt.

Shocking.

But yeah, there’s no trace of cow pies or anything else immediately unpleasant in the mud.

It’s just dirt.

What will you do?

You’re a person who likes mud. Or, at the very least, a person who doesn’t mind mud on occasion.

You push yourself up on your tip-toes, and tiiiiiiilt forwards.

Splat.

Heeheehee.

You immediately realize that mud is not the same as water, and flail to get out. It sticks to you, suctioning you back in. Finally you force your feet under you, and shove yourself up.

Wiping the mud off your face, you take a deep breath.

That was fun. Don’t do it again.

You’ve heard of mud baths. People pay good money to get covered in mud.

Personally, I think that’s 100 percent a result of marketing, but hey, I’m not one to judge. Besides, it’s not like that’s a thing I can google and find a definitive answer on. I’ll find hundreds of pages telling me that mud is good for skin, arthritis, skin lacerations, stress, and eighty thousand other things. And then I’ll also find hundreds of pages telling me that mud does basically nothing, and people should stop wasting their money on it.

Confirmation bias and all that.

But anyways, you’re here, mud is here, and you might as well get covered in it.

You slide down, until you’re sitting against the wall. The mud comes to just under your chin, which is nice.

The smell of fresh dirt fills your nostrils, reminding you of happy childhood days. Somehow.

The liquid in the mud seeps through your jumpsuit, getting into your skin. It feels good, and slowly warms with your body heat. It’s pretty relaxing, to tell the truth.

Don’t fall asleep, or you might drown.

Yeah, you’re not really a fan of getting mud all over you. You’ll remain standing. Besides, you don’t know what kind of things there are in this mud. Even having it halfway up your legs is far too much skin contact, thank you.

But you have to do something, so you take your muddy finger, and draw on the wall. You make a line, then another line, and draw…

Cute. Reeeeeal cute. Just, the next Picasso, that’s what you are. Congratulations, drawing such a detailed picture like that. Out of mud. Surely no one has ever done that before.

You can’t tell, but I’m sarcastically slow clapping.

You do NOT like mud. You have issues with mud. Mud is not your friend.

You look around in a panic, and see the only thing that might get you out.

The light. On the ceiling.

Personally, I really really don’t recommend that. You kind of need that light. Are you sure you want to grab the light?

Well, you’re jumping up and down, trying to grab it, so I guess the answer is yes.

Are you tall enough to grab it?

You jump up and down, waving your arms, but can’t seem to reach it. Instead, you fall backwards into the mud, landing with a splorch on your back.

This is the opposite of what you wanted.

You go comatose for a few seconds, and regain consciousness when the weight of the mud on your chest starts inhibiting your breathing.

Scrambling to your feet, you look around, shivering.

You are! You grab the edge of the thin aluminum casing, gripping it like your life depends on it.

Sadly, that thing wasn’t built to support your weight. It was barely built to support the weight of the lightbulb.

Ever so slowly, you feel the casing bend. You hear the screws pop out of the ceiling.

And then, with a pop, the lightbulb breaks.

That… That’s not good. There are now glas shards and mercury in the room. All bad things.

On top of that, the screws in the ceiling have said their last prayers, and died. The casing you’re holding on to falls from the ceiling, landing on top of you in the mud.

Agan, all the bad things.

You panic, scrambling in the darkness, and ram your face into the wall. You knock yourself out.

A few seconds later you come to, feeling mud slowly enveloping your chest.

Well, now that you’re all covered in mud, let’s find the button!

...It’s down there, I promise. Somewhere.

You move to the center of the room, sliding your feet around.

It takes a couple minutes, and you pass it a couple of times, but finally your toe finds resistance. You carefully maneuver your foot over the button.

DO YOU PRESS THE BUTTON? Yes No