I woke up the next morning at dawn. When I stepped outside both of the girls were facing each other doing sun salutations. I started to get angry and then looked and saw that both of them had their machetes and knives beside them on the grass. ‘Good, good!’ I thought. It was a beautiful morning. A little bit foggy and the air had that translucent blue quality that some mornings get, the birds were just getting started. I heard a bunch of bird calls that I’d never heard before and saw shimmering flashes of color in the trees that I knew were not native species. We had Scarlet Tanagers, Blue Birds, Robins, and the occasional Cardinal, nothing that was these bright yellow, teals, lime greens, even neon pink. That more than anything told me that the world had changed, Oklahoma had changed...

The fire was lit in the fire circle and the pots stood ready, but there was no food being cooked yet. I hoped that the supplies that I had gathered into the boxes inside of Mighty Max were still there because otherwise, I didn’t know what we were going to do for breakfast. While waiting for the girls to finish, I sat on one of the diorama logs and started to plan out our day.

First things first though, I thought hard the word, time. And sure enough, in the corner of my right eye, a digital (at least it looked like a digital clock to me) appeared saying 06:43:13. After a second, it faded away. I did this a few more times and sure enough the seconds displayed had changed so it was official, the wristwatch business was dead. Then I thought date and the following appeared Ignisday, 1/1/1.

‘Imu,” I thought. ‘What is this the first day of?’ When I went to bed last night at midnight when the apocalypse happened, it was midnight, June 6, 2018. Not January 1, Year 1.

‘It is the first day of Quietus, Year 1,’ my little buddy answered.

‘I don’t recognize that month or year,’ I thought at it.

‘But nonetheless, that is today’s date,’ it replied.

‘What is our calendar then?’ I asked.

‘There are still 12 months of the year. The months are called: Quietus, Vita, Tenebris, Lux, Chao, Ordo, Terra, Caeli, Aqua, Ignis, Malum, Bonum. Each month falls under a different influence. Bad things are more likely to happen in Chao or Malum. Good things happen more often in Ordo and Bonum. There are other influences at play as well. Be warned that there is a real possibility that the calendar can affect your spell casting. Spells of fire are more potent in Ignis and less in Aqua and vice versa. The eight days of the week are now called after the elements: Ignisday, Aquaday, Teraday, Caeliday, Luxday, Tenebrisday, Vitaday, and Quietusday.’

‘So that makes our years what, ah, wait, how many weeks are there in a month?’ I asked.

‘There are still four weeks in a month,’ it answered.

‘So that makes our years 382 days long?’ I asked.

‘Yes,’ it answered.

‘Huh,’ I thought. I was stunned yet again by the magnitude of the changes that we were going through, looking out past the girls doing yoga across the field of grass that used to be a crumbling parking lot, I could only shake my head and hope for our survival. I supposed if the System could add another two moons, reworking the calendar wasn’t that major a change. Come to think about it, if the System added two moons, our calendar would need to change.

Just then the girls finished their yoga and came over. “Good to see you’re alive,” said Janet.

“Hey,” I said. “It’s 6:45 in the morning. I’m up way early. Especially when you consider that I went to bed at around 2:00 last night.”

“You go boy!” said Tanya. “How’d you figure out the time. I don’t see a watch or have you figured out how to use your cell slab?” she said, referring to the bricks of black material that our cell phones had turned into.

“Think time!” I said.

“Woh!” said Janet. “A clock in mah head! Cool!”

“You want to see something freakier. Think date!” I said.

“It’s the 1st day of the first year of the first month? It’s not January, it’s June, and, the last I heard, it was 2018. What gives?” said Tanya.

“It’s the first day of the month Quietus in the year one. Oh, and it’s Ignisday, apparently.” I said.

“Huh?” they both said at the same time.

“Yeah, and weeks have eight days in them too,” I said. “Who knew? Ignisday, Aquaday, Teraday, Caeliday, Luxday, Tenebrisday, Vitaday, and Quietusday.” Both of them started to yell questions at me and I just held up my hand to them. “Everything I know, you now know,” I said. “Talk to your imues if you want more information, that’s all I know. Ok, let’s plan our day, shall we?” I said.

“Last night we said, well ok I said, we’d need to talk tactics and strategy, practice some battles formations, and try to figure out how we’re going to get to my mother's place. I figure now’s a good time. What do you two think?” I asked.

Both of the girls looked a little sweaty. I tried not to stare, but it was hard. I mean, two gorgeous women, sweaty and limber. “I think that I want breakfast,” Janet said. “All my years of dieting and now I’m stuck in a field on the morning after the apocalypse wishing to a God who evidently took off, that I had a McMuffin and a coffee. Anyone got anything to eat?”

“Oh God! I’d kill for a McMuffin, or better still one of the Village Inn’s short stacks,” I said.

“Well, I don’t know if I have something for us to eat or not. Last night when I was unpacking the trailer, I started hurling the MREs that I’d bought out, so I think we’ve got at least six months of food. I went online to the website called “TheReadyStore.com.” They had this package deal of six months of MREs. So I bought it, on sale for $2,520.00. I don’t know, it just seemed like the thing to do at the time, so - assuming that they’re still good - we should have two months apiece of meals. Although I didn’t look them over very well when I was unpacking, I did notice some changes to the packages when I went over to get our weapons. They didn’t look like the 18 boxes of food that I bought though so we’ll have to see what They left us.

We stood up and wandered over to what used to be the loading dock and looked over the non-weapon items that I’d bought. My Carhartt overalls had translated into what looked like leather clothes. Once we held it up, we were able to see that it was now three sets of light-weight leather gear, the polyesters and other plastics in the insulation and covering had been transformed into what appeared to be some type of animal hide. It was thicker than what you’d normally build a purse out of, but I wouldn’t want to depend on it against a sword or a gun, although I guess guns were a thing of the past. It would probably do well against brush though, so standard forest gear made without plastics? Once again, the sets of overalls had translated to three leather armors and two of them were obviously not for me. The Doc Martins I’d bought had changed too, looking more like army boots with thick leather soles and leather ties instead of laces. Once again, there were three pairs and judging by their sizes and shapes, once again, two of them weren’t for me.

“Ok,” I said. “Let’s see what we’ve got to eat.” It was funny how the apocalypse had adapted the cardboard boxes. They were now made out of thin boards like you might buy a couple of bottles of wine in. They were pale wood that appeared varnished, actually, they seemed fairly well made. They didn’t have any designs or graphics or labels or lettering on them, they were just plain, although, well-made wood. Pre-apocalypse me would have used them as bookshelves or for something decorative in my living room. Post-apocalypse me was more concerned that they were quite a bit smaller than the big cardboard boxes. I wondered how something that size could hold six months of chow. I picked up one and figured out how to slide off the lid and looked inside. Inside each of the eighteen boxes were 10 small glass bottles about the size of a bottle of NyQuil which were sealed with both cork and wax. Inside was an almost glowing, pink fluid. And, of course, there was no label on them either.

“Well, shoot!” I said as I pulled one of them out of their box. “Anyone have any idea what the heck these are?” I asked. The girls pulled it out of my hands and looked it over closely.

I looked on as they examined the bottles and their caps. I thought about my wish to have some kind of magical ability to identify things and then I thought about how when I was first setting up my interface, everything was labeled. I wondered if maybe I had restricted the labeling action of the interface too much. I remembered how I’d just thought to the interface or, maybe, at the interface and it turned off all of the annoying messages and tried to adjust it to show labels on both things that were either living or dangerous (my current default setting) and also to show labels on things that I was curious about. After a few moments, a label appeared above the bottle, ‘Minor Potion of Sustenance.’”

“Congratulations! You’ve discovered, Identify. For every 1 point of mana invested, you can determine basic information about a person, object or living thing. This is an internal skill, meaning you can only use it on or for yourself. As you get better, the amount of knowledge you gain, the cost and the amount of time required may go down. OK, it will, but we’re not telling you how much. …

“I don’t know what it is,” said Tanya. “It’s really pink though. I don’t suppose They traded out our food for Pepto Bismol, did they?”

“Try looking at it with captions or labels turned on,” I said.

“Ooh!” They both said. “I got,” Tanya began. And then Janet cut in and said, “Identify, right? Nice one, Monsoon!”

“Yeah,” said Tanya. “What she said.”

“My mother thanks you. My father thanks you. My sister thanks you. And I thank you.” I said trying to channel James Cagney. Evidently unsuccessfully ‘cause they both just stared at me. “James Cagney, Yankee Doodle Dandy??” They just kept staring. “My mom likes old movies,” I muttered.

“Ok then,” I said.

“Imu, what’s a ‘Minor Potion of Sustenance?’”, I asked.

The little guy appeared and said, “It is a potion that provides all of the necessary nutrients for the drinker to survive for 24 hours. At the end of that time, their system will adjust back to normal with the onset of hunger pangs in approximately 4-5 hours. Fluids must still be consumed.” And then he vanished.

I knew I should have bought bottles of Gatorade too!

“Well,” I said. And then I pulled out another bottle, removed the top and slammed it. It was good, tasting like lemonade and a cool breeze. ‘Thank God!’ I thought. ‘At least this isn’t one of those manga’s where potions taste like dog spit.’ “Not bad!” I said.

And then a notification appeared:

You drank a “Lesser Potion of Sustenance.” All nutritional needs are taken care of for the next 24 hours. … and your farts smell like Bubblicious bubble gum. … just kidding … about the last part although they will smell vaguely strawberry-ish. TMI?

“Well, I’m good for the next 24 hours!” I said. “Let’s talk formations!”

Both girls glanced at each other and then took out a potion and downed it. “Not bad!” said Tanya. “Yeah,” said Janet. “Did anyone else taste a breeze? I mean how is that even possible? How do you taste wind? How would I even know that it was a breeze? It’s not like I’ve ever tasted one before?”

Tanya and I looked at each other and then spoke at once, “It’s magic!”

“Ok,” I said. “I’ve taken care of meal number one, you girls are on the hook for meal number two.”

“What?” they both yelled?

“Relax,” I said. “That’s the first rule. I cooked, I don’t clean.”

“Nice try white man!” said Janet. “It doesn’t work that way around me.”

“Me neither!” said Tanya. “Looks like we’ve got to set up some rules?”

“Lord,” I said. “Here we go!”

“Don’t feed the animals!” Tanya said.

“Good one!” Janet said. “Best cook, cooks.”

“Alright,” I said. “Cooks don’t clean.”

“Nope,” said Tanya. “How about this, the cook gets first-watch.”

“Ok,” I said. “I see where this is going. Midwatch is rotated then. And, if no one cooks, the previous midwatch is last-watch, first-watch is midwatch and last-watch is first-watch.”

“Ok,” Tanya said. “How do we determine who’s the best cook?”

“Show Cooking Skill to Party,” I said. And immediately a notification appeared in front of me and, guessing from their jumps, the girls.

Monsoon Seebring, Cooking Skill - Level 2.

“Ha! Sucker! Eat this!” said Janet. “Show Cooking Skill to Party.”

Janet Lee, Cooking Skill - Level 3

We both looked at Tanya then and she said, “Show Cooking Skill to Party.”

Tany Slovakia, Cooking Skill - Level 5

She shook her head. “Mom was a single mother and, before she married the asshole, had a couple of jobs trying to make ends meet. I had to cook for my little brother who was finicky.”

“OK looks like Tanya’s the cook then,” Janet said.

“Do you want to be cook all the time?” I asked. “Because I think we get experience points for leveling skills, and cooking is something that we have to do all the time so it might be a way to gain experience for all of us. What do you think?” I asked.

“To tell you the truth, I’d rather not be the full-time cook,’ she said. “I used to like to do it, but having to do it all the time would kind of suck.”

“OK,” I said. “Then we’ll just leave it at cook get’s first watch and, if the cook changes, the former cook gets midwatch.”

“Sounds good to me,” Janet said. “Me too!” said Tanya.

“Alright, formations. Wait, before we move on, does anyone have more rules to propose?” I said.

“Just this one,” said Tanya. “Everybody works!”

“That works for me,” I said. “I don’t know how someone would get entitled and think that they don’t have to pull their weight, but I’m just saying now, it ain’t gonna happen. Everybody’s got to pull their weight!”

“Well,” said Janet. “Except in Rickshaw pulling. In that case, Monsoon pulls everybody’s weight!” Both girls started laughing and high-fived each other.

“So, anyway,” I said. “Here’s what I think we should use as formations. A triangle with me in the lead. Since I’m going to be the tank I’ll be at the front with a shield and a weapon. The weapon might differ based on what we’re fighting. For instance, something big like I don’t know, a mutated cow, I’d probably have a spear, for undead skeletons, God, I hope zombies don’t exist, I’d probably have a hammer or mace, for a human I’d probably have my sword. What I’d like you both to do is to back me up, form the base of the triangle. Tanya on the left, Janet on the right. You’d both have a ranged weapon - the crossbow - and your knives and machetes. You should probably use the crossbow first and then rely on spells. Janet, your spells are healing and maybe buffing and de-buffing, Tanya, your spells will be offensive, fire, force, water, something like that. What I need you both to do is to really focus. Janet, you’re going to be the healer. Your job is to stay alive AND keep us alive. Damage dealing is always going to be secondary to you. Maybe we can get you a pet? Tanya you’re going to be a DPS, you want to bring the pain AND, most importantly, you’re going to be our tactician. Right now, we have only the three of us, so I figure we have only some basic moves. Here’s what I’ve got:”

“Back Up or BUp - pretty obvious, but absolutely necessary.” “Rotate Left or RL - which means all three of us pivot around me and move left. That means Janet’s got to bust butt, Tanya’s got to hold back and I need to pay attention to what’s going on with you two.” “Then there's the opposite, Rotate Right or RR - which means Tanya busts butt, Janet holds back and, once again, I need to pay attention to what’s going on with you two. I figure that the RL/RL could have a degree specified in it by Degree 45 or D45 and all of them would have a distance, BUp 5 would mean back up 5 feet.” “Swords would mean everybody advances and kills it or them, whatever it may be, and” “Shields would mean backup until told to stop, and” “Something that I haven’t figured out yet, would mean, ‘run like heck’! and finally,” “You could add an adjective of ‘Skinny’ or ‘Fat’ to the front to describe how big you want the triangle?

“So what do you think?” I asked.

“I think it sounds like Cheerleading if you ask me,” said Tanya. “But without the pom poms and smiles.”

“I think it will work,” said Janet. “At least until we come up with something better. And what did you mean by practice?”

“Just what I said. We have this nice field here, which used to be the parking lot I called home, I say we spend a couple of hours working on formations. Tanya calls and we all move. Every fifteen minutes we take a break, evaluate and modify and keep going. No pauses, no slacking. This may keep us alive.” I said.

“And then?” asked Tanya.

“We start to play with our magic. I’d like to get a spell from all elements before we set out. But failing that at least get something more than ‘Jade Lotus Touch’ which came with my Monk Class, ‘Light’ and ‘Force Bolt’ and ‘Create Water’ which I got with my mage class. What did you girls get?”

“I got something called ‘Light Heal’ and ‘Clean’ and ‘Awareness’” Janet said.

Tanya said, “I received ‘Force Bolt’, ‘Light’ and ‘Charm’

“And then?” asked Tanya.

“Well,” I said. “We could practice with crossbows. I could show you how to load them, crank them up, and fire into a target. We could go over the safety rules again.

“And then?” Tanya asked again.

By this time I was starting to suspect something was going on in that blond head of hers, it didn’t help that Janet was starting to laugh under her breath.

“I guess,” I said, “we can go over knife fighting basics. Where to cut, what to expect, practice a little bit. That kind of stuff.”

“And then?” Tanya asked again. By this time Janet was rolling on the floor and I finally clued in, “No ‘and den’” I started shouting in my best Austin Kutcher voice while Tanya kept saying “and den, and den.” I’m not sure if it was the tension we were all under or if it was that funny, but we laughed for about ten minutes. Anytime one of us would start to stop, someone else would say ‘and den’ and we’d start up again. God, I loved that movie.

Finally, we quit though and I got them out on the field and we started working on our formations.

“Skinny B-Up!”.

“Fat swords!”

“Fat B-Up 10!”

After a short time, we decided that almost any of the calls needed an “Up” command added, so the calls changed a little bit. The Up meant start.

“RL - D45 Up!”

“LL - D90 Up!”

Then we decided that the D in the turns was confusing, so we eliminated it.

“RR 90 Up!”

“RL 45 Up!”

“Skinny RR 90 Up!”

After a notable call of ‘LL 33 Up’ and it’s total failure we decided that the only angles that could be called were 45, 90, and, after some debate, reluctantly 180. Reluctantly because it was a pain for the girls and me to synchronize our turns and it was hard to say.

Then we decided that distance was too important to mix with turning so every advance/retreat call would be separate and, of course, we added F-Up which meant Forward whatever feet were specified. It also sounded like we were telling whatever we were fighting to f*** off, so that was a bonus.

And finally, we decided that we needed a stop call, something that would make us stop moving, not fighting, and that became “All Stop”. And, of course, we talked about what to do if we needed to surrender or take prisoners or to stop fighting and that led to “Fight Stop.” That took a little over the two hours that we’d planned for it, but it was worth it. We also made plans to practice every morning before yoga and meditation. Not for a full two hours, just for 30 minutes to wake us up. So 30 minutes of drilling, followed by 30 minutes of yoga and 30 minutes of meditation, the last one with a guard on watch, of course. All of this would slow us down but should increase the probability of arriving, if you know what I mean.