《I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please》Ch199 - Fedora Tipping

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After Jonathan is completely out of sight, Lucas sighs softly. Beginning his trek to the elevators yet again, he pulls on and adjusts his suit jacket, pops his dress shirt’s collar, and fusses with lining up his tie while he’s walking.

Stepping around the last corner so that the lobby area comes into view once more, this time around he was delayed enough that Miss Masher is currently waving goodbye to Miss Chievous, and starting to walk towards the elevators.

‘Hmm? Where’s she goin’?’

[...How would I know? Go find out yourself.]

Lucas quietly clicks his tongue and raises up a hand to wave at the sisters before calling out to them.

“Hey, guys! Er, gals. ...Ladies? No, that definitely doesn’t feel right, gals it is. Uh, sup?” Lucas’s eloquence elicits a few chuckles from the two sisters, whom both wave back.

Miss Chievous gives a simple, “Hey!” whereas Miss Masher has a bit more to say.

“Heya, wasn’t sure if I was gonna catch ya or not, but it felt silly ta just stand around waitin’ only to say bye. I’m gonna go meet up with Natalie and Sarah, remember when she gave me that invitation earlier at I4?” While Miss Masher was answering, Lucas continued walking over until he reaches a more comfortable conversational distance from her.

“Huh? Oh… Oh! Tch, you’re just having a great day, ain’t ya? Aw, I’d wanna go with ya an’ buy Sylph some birdseed… but not right now.” Lucas doesn’t even try to hide his envy upon his realization of what she’s on her way to go do.

‘No fair, she gets to go have fun while I gotta go deal with some berzerked OD’ed asshole…’

[...]

Miss Masher gains a huge grin in response, happily displaying the gap in her teeth.

“Hells yeah! Hey, it’s not just me though. Today’s a pretty good day for a buncha people. Jon and Willy definitely seemed happy enough, and Mary’s probably in cloud nine right now with 23...” As Miss Masher trails off, she glances over at Miss Chievous, who grins in return.

“Any day I can eat like we did at lunch is an excellent day as far as I’m concerned, forget all the other fun stuff that’s happened. Though, I bet that fangirl of yours had the best day of her life today, she was hilarious.” Upon Miss Chievous bringing up Clarissa, Lucas flinches subconsciously.

‘...Though I guess they’re not wrong.’

[Indeed. You and Jonathan directly helped no small number of people today, leading to quite a few ‘good days’.]

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‘...It is kinda satisfyin’, now that I’m thinkin’ about it.’

“...I guess ya could say that. Anywho, speakin’ of food, I was just talkin’ with Jon, an’ we’re gonna go over to that cafe across the street for a few snacks to tide us over till dinner, he already ran ahead to get in line. You two want anythin’? My treat.” When Lucas extends the offer, Miss Masher looks thoughtful and Miss Chievous’s face lights up.

“I thought he ran past just a little while ago! Ooh, I hope they have brownies, I can’t stop thinking about that one you and Jon had after lunch.” Miss Chievous stands up as she is saying this, pulling the messenger bag over to loop the strap diagonally across her chest, leaving no doubt as to whether or not she was planning on accompanying him there.

‘Sweet, just as easy as I hoped, eheh.’

Miss Masher didn’t remain pensive for long, now smiling again as she pulls out her phone while she gives her answer.

“Sure, I should go grab a few drinks before goin’ over. Ya mind coverin’ for Natalie and Sarah too? If I tell Sarah ya paid for the drinks and that ya wanna swing by tomorrow to get some snacks for Sylph, she’ll probably freshly grow some of her favorites first thing in the morning and have ‘em all bagged and good to go by the time ya get there to pick it up tomorrow afternoon. ...I figure we’re gonna be breaking more stuff together tomorrow, right?” Miss Masher has a light tone while she is asking this, typing up a message on her phone to Natalie to ask what they want while she’s speaking.

Even though she kept it casual, she does start closely watching Lucas as she asks her last question, not that he even notices.

“Hmm? Yeah, sure, sure. Man, fresh treats for Sylph, she’s gonna love it. And, yeah, I figure we should get it all over with sooner than later, so they can start work on the offices and stuff right away. If yer busy, it’s fine, I’ll even add more metal to that scrap ball for ya if ya want, even if yer not around.” When Lucas answers with positives across the board, Miss Masher’s smile grows a bit more, but she snorts at the end.

“Tch, if anythin’ I’d rather ya waited so I could play some more too, if I was busy. That’s not a problem, though. Ha, they put their drink orders in plenty fast, guess that was a good idea.” Miss Masher can’t resist laughing at how quickly Natalie submitted her requests, despite her inhibited state.

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Lucas chuckles along, then looks up and notices the fact that the elevator doors are just about finished opening.

“Oh, sweet, elevator’s ready. Let’s go!” While saying this, Lucas begins leading the way, shortly followed by the two sisters.

Miss Chievous has a thoughtful expression while staring at the awaiting elevator, having noticed that there was nothing inside and that no one came out of it.

“...I’m used to being the reasons elevators look empty, it really is a little weird to see it happen, since I know you two didn’t hit the button to bring it over, either.” When Miss Chievous says this, Lucas starts laughing.

“That’s why ya noticed kiddo runnin’ by before, he went to go bring it up for me before goin’ to take the stairs. He’s done it a couple times now, it’s pretty damn convenient, ‘specially with how fuckin’ slow the elevators are here… I’m gonna have to talk to Mark about upgradin’ them, or somethin’.” While Lucas is answering, Miss Chievous briefly has a soft expression that quickly turns wistful.

“Speed really is useful, isn’t it? ...His control over it far is too stable, he has to be older than he looks… right?” As Miss Chievous is saying this, she turns her gaze from the empty elevator back over to Lucas.

If Lucas were someone more aware of social nuance, he might have actually noticed the hopeful tone at the tail end of her closing question.

Alas, he is oblivious.

‘Uhh, how old is Jon again..? Early teens, yeah?’

[...He’s fourteen.]

“It really is, heh. An’ the kiddo’s fourteen, I guess he started his powers a bit younger than most. I’m thinkin’ he used it more than his fair share while he was stuck homeless, too. Lotta practice, an’ all that. Though, I dunno his exact birthday, now that I think about it…” Upon Lucas’s clarification, Miss Chievous flinches and her expression sinks a little bit.

After half a beat, she has a lighthearted smile again, though.

“Tch, some father you are, not even knowing his birthday! ...Like you’re even actually old enough to be his dad, anyway. You’re about the same age as Mary and I, right?” As Miss Chievous is asking this, the elevator doors are partway through shutting with them inside, as Lucas had hit the first floor’s button once they were all settled in.

He began tugging on his tie to start the process of knotting it since he is otherwise going to be standing around with idle hands for a bit, but before he speaks up, Miss Masher does instead.

“Oh, actually, Jon told me he only had his powers for like, four months. Insane, right? And I guess it’s not too weird that Lucas doesn’t know his birthday yet, since they’ve only known each other for one DAY.” When Miss Masher says this in a simultaneously bragging yet conspiratorial tone, Miss Chievous sputters and Lucas flinches.

-----

Lucas’s total kills: 7

Lucas’s total deaths: 11

Lucas’s total assists: 1

Lucas’s current GDV: 17.43 [Recalculating...]

Lucas’s fame level: 6.0* (Local fame is completely maxed, he’s creeping up on minor celebrity status even on a global scale. Thanks, internet.)

Lucas's hero suspicion level: 2.0*

Jonathan’s total kills: 7

Jonathan’s total deaths: 4

Jonathan’s current GDV: 6.10 [Recalculating...]

Jonathan's fame level: 4.0* (Local fame is near-max, but everyone thinks of him via his affiliation with Lucas, and not often just for him, alone.)

Jonathan's hero suspicion level: 2.5*

Willy's fame level: 4.75* (Recently increased thanks to a new wave of memes featuring him and Mr. Quacks.)

Mr. Quacks’s fame level: 5.25* (Recently increased thanks to a new wave of memes featuring him and Willy.)

Supervillain social circle size: 15

-----

Little character theater:

Jonathan is currently engaged in a game of high-stakes dodgeball, with the cafe’s tables and chairs serving in the place of balls. Needless to say, the majority of customers have already fled the store, screaming.

Willy now has a thin blanket spread across his body, as a service bot came by to check on him and carefully placed it on him after noticing his pup-dream twitches, uncertain if it was shiver-related.

Lucas, freaking out a bit: ‘When the hell, and WHY did he admit that to her!?’

427, thinking it over before speaking up: [...I’m going to assume it was at the I4 while the two of them were chatting without you. He was probably so stressed out he couldn’t come up with a convincing lie that he’d be able to maintain.]

Author, idly cleaning their nails: It was just a matter of time before good ol’ Marsha told her sisters, at least this way Lucas and 427 know, too?

Mr. Quacks, confident in Jonathan’s youthful game prowess, is now fully dedicated to solving his cake consumption conundrums: Quack…

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