The rest of the day crawled by while Syryn moved like an automaton, thoughtlessly going through the motions that were required of him.

Utsui's body was taken by the avians for funeral preparations. Like the other heroes of war, he would be cremated in the sky and his ashes buried at the temple of the Phoenix.

Syryn was back at his Helios residence. Owing to its distance from the main city block, it had escaped the devastation that the demons wrought. The teen was curled up in bed, feeling the deep purrs of Navi who was nestled against his chest. Milky was at the window, his snowy white paws tucked under his chest. The white cat was looking out the window in what seemed like a contemplative mood if that was even possible for a feline.

Syryn reached under his pillow and retrieved a long hairpin which he slowly twirled between his fingers, feeling the smooth grain of the ebony wood. It had a delicate jade leaf at the end. When the avains had told him they were taking Utsui's body away, the teen had relieved his friend of his hair pin. He wouldn't have begrudged Syryn for it, or at least that's what Syryn believed.

A knock on his bedroom door drew his attention out of the pit of sadness he was marinating in. Syryn ignored it. He wasn't in the mood to speak with anyone. The door opened anyway, and the intruder stepped into his room quietly.

Syryn's eyes were closed when he felt the presence of someone next to him. The teen opened his eyes and turned to his side to face the man who had come to see him.

"Rowan," he said softly.

His immaculate gold blonde hair neatly fell over his eyes when he leaned over Syryn. Rowan smelled clean and fresh like he had just taken a bath. The teen noticed that the anti mage was wearing a different set of clothing than when he had arrived at Nua. It was obvious that Rowan had cleaned up before coming to him.

Rowan kissed Syryn lightly on his forehead. "How are you, Ryn?"

The teen lifted a corner of his blanket and waited for Rowan to get in. "A little better now that you're here," he answered.

The bed dipped imperceptibly when Rowan eased himself in next to Syryn. Propping his head on an elbow, the anti mage watched the teen watch him.

"I heard about your friend, Utsui. I'm sorry, Ryn."

"Yeah, me too."

Syryn inched closer to Rowan till he could feel the warmth from the anti mage pressing against his body. Rowan was solid, firm, and something about it made Syryn feel safer. An arm went around him and the anti mage caressed the back of his neck. Syryn closed his eyes and let Rowan lull him into sleep with his gentle touches.

-------

When Syryn roused after a few hours of sleep, it was late in the evening. He was ensconced between the arms of an anti mage whose eyes were closed in sleep. The teen lifted his head and spied thick gold lashes curving above beautifully sculpted cheekbones. Rowan was a picture of peace when he was sleeping.

Syryn leaned a few inches into Rowan's space and left a soft kiss on his neck. It drew the anti mage's gorgeous lips into an arc. He wasn't asleep. Those gold lashes that Syryn had been admiring lifted up to reveal cerulean blue eyes.

The anti mage touched Syryn's cheeks and cupped them in his large palm. He leaned his weight on an elbow and lowered his mouth down to Syryn's.

The teen's lips were soft and pliant. It was their first kiss after their separation.

They kissed slowly, breathed in each other, drank from the comfort that came from such simple but profound intimacy, and Syryn wept - for how lucky he was to have been given a second lease at life so he could spend it with Rowan. The death of his friend was a reminder to Syryn that this could all be taken away from him again.

"Ryn, are you thinking about Ustui?" Rowan asked as he wiped at a wet cheek.

"About him but also us."

"I won't leave you," Rowan quietly declared.

"What if I leave you?" Syryn replied.

"I won't let go."

Syryn was reminded of the dream he had about Rowan.

"If I die, you'll have to let go."

Rowan frowned. "Where's this coming from, Ryn?"

"Nowhere. I just thought about how fleeting life is. You and I are only mortals, Ro. Who knows when the hands of death could pluck us away from the living plane?"

"Then I'll have to stay by your side, day and night. If death comes for you, they'll find an extra passenger to take along." Rowan said the ominous words with a smile.

"Are you crazy?" Syryn asked. Rowan would die with him, for him. That was insane. Rowan was insane.

"I am. And it was your hand that snatched away some part of my sanity in the last life." Rowan wasn't joking.

Syryn felt goosebumps erupt on his skin. "What did I do?"

"Nothing. It was all my fault, Ryn." Rowan said as he kissed the pads of Syryn's fingers, one finger at a time. "It won't happen again this time. I'll destroy this world and the both of us if history repeats itself."

Rowan meant it. There was no doubt in his words.

Syryn blinked and looked away. His anti mage was perfect on the surface but he was starting to see the tendrils of darkness that crept through little chinks in his armour - the gaps that Rowan was allowing him to see. If the mage had any doubts about this man being the Rowan of his past, they were swept away by the knowledge that Rowan hadn't come back alone. He had brought along with him the ghosts of his past.

Syryn chuckled darkly. When the anti mage became the Rowan of the past, he had ceased to become the Rowan that Syryn was familiar with. It was ironic.

"You're damaged," he told the smiling blonde.

"Yes. More so than you could ever imagine."