I Might Be A Fake Cultivator Chapter 961
Advertisement
Chapter 961: Live Streaming the Heavenly Tribulation
What’s with this live stream-esque atmosphere?
No, this is a true f*cking live stream!
An Lin was stunned.
Atomic Bomb Fairy: “Enlightened Divine Talisman, how’s Daoist You Mu doing right now?”
The fatty in the live stream cracked a wide grin. “My master is in tip-top shape, of course!”
Crack Shot Clairvoyant: “When is the Heavenly Tribulation going to begin?”
“In around an hour,” the fatty on the screen replied.
The cultivators in the chat continued to interact with Enlightened Divine Talisman.
An Lin tapped open a tab on the live stream screen. There was a tip menu there, and the highest tip category was spirit stones.
So far, only Tian Lingling had tipped one spirit stone. Although this didn’t seem like much, the fatty was over the moon with joy.
An Lin pondered for a moment before choosing the one hundred spirit stones option.
Ding Dong!
“System notification: Fake Daoist Priest Little An has tipped 100 spirit stones.”
An azure dragon suddenly appeared on the screen, and spirit stones started raining down. Not only that, but everyone in the group chat was also automatically tagged. Cultivators started to enter the chat one after another, and they were all stunned by what they saw.
Golden Jade: “Holy f*ck! Sword Immortal An Lin has come!”
Tycoon An: “All hail Tycoon An!”
Dreamy Voice Fairy: “Good Lord! So much money!”
Domineering Saber Lord: “All bow down to the supreme leader!”
Calm Celestial Maiden: “Humph! How wasteful.”
Tian Lingling: “Haha, the true tycoon has appeared. It’s time for poor little me to stop posing as a wealthy person! Welcome to the chat, Tycoon An!”
Daoist Wooden Ox: “So generous! Only Tycoon An can tip one hundred spirit stones as if it were nothing. Accept my worship!”
Countless messages popped up in the group chat, and it was as if his screen was refreshing at a rapid rate.
Enlightened Divine Talisman was dazed for a few seconds. He rubbed his eyes in disbelief before shrieking, “Ah! Thank you for tipping one hundred spirit stones, Tycoon An! This is a wonderful surprise, I bloody love you! Senior, I’ve heard about all your marvelous exploits!”
Advertisement
Enlightened Divine Talisman danced around like a two-hundred-pound man-child. His eyes were squished into a squint, and his plain-colored daoist robe was jiggled around by his fat. He looked extremely thrilled.
An Lin smiled and sent a request over.
Fake Daoist Priest Little An: “Can I observe Daoist You Mu from a closer distance?”
Enlightened Divine Talisman was momentarily dazed upon hearing this. Then, he nodded his head firmly. “Of course! Master hasn’t started to undergo his Heavenly Tribulation yet. Observe all you want!”
How could he refuse a tycoon’s request? Even if An Lin wanted his body, he would still grudgingly accept his request. Besides, this request was so simple anyway!
Just like that, Enlightened Divine Talisman ran toward Daoist You Mu.
As the sect leader of the Shang Qing Immortal Sect, You Mu’s strength was profound, and he was also extremely mighty. No cultivator dared to go near him before his Heavenly Tribulation. They only dared to observe from a suitable distance.
Of course, his disciple, Enlightened Divine Talisman, was an exception.
“Master! Master! The cultivators of the ‘protect earth’ group chat want to observe you from a closer distance!” Enlightened Divine Talisman chuckled as he ran toward You Mu.
You Mu glanced at Enlightened Divine Talisman angrily. “Piss off! Read the mood of the situation, will you?!”
“But… But Tycoon An tipped us one hundred spirit stones!” Enlightened Divine Talisman shrunk back slightly, and he spoke in an upset tone.
Boom!
You Mu shuddered violently as if he had been struck by divine lightning.
There was a bright gleam in his eyes, and he roared, “Hurry up! Turn the camera toward me!”
Enlightened Divine Talisman: “…”
Group chat: “…”
Just like that, You Mu’s rugged face appeared on the screens of their phones. He even made peace signs with his hands in a show of respect. “Hey! Greetings to everyone in the group chat! Thank you all for your well-wishes. Also, thank you for your tip of one hundred spirit stones, Mr. An Lin. Alright, I won’t say anything else for now. I believe that I’ll definitely transcend the tribulation successfully!”
The cultivators in the group chat kept smashing the like button and sending through their well-wishes.
Advertisement
An Lin couldn’t help but grimace upon seeing this normal yet abnormal atmosphere.
Tian Lingling: “Senior You Mu, you’ll definitely succeed! I, Tian Lingling, have said this, and Di Ling Ling[1] also agrees with me. Our words will definitely ring true!”
Spirit Child Shi: “That’s right. Both heaven and earth are undergoing huge changes, and a new age is upon us. Senior You Mu will definitely be the first among us to transcend the Soul Formation Stage and break through to the Return to Void Stage!”
Crack Shot Clairvoyant: “Senior You Mu, I’ve just had a look at your fortunes. Your sign was one of great luck and imminent fortune!”
An Lin: “…”
Fake Daoist Priest Little An: “Senior You Mu, I’ve also had a look at your fortunes. You’ll definitely overcome all the obstacles and become the strongest cultivator on Earth!”
What fortune telling? Pffft… All he had to do was to just bullsh*t some praise. If You Mu really was struck to death by the Golden Void Lightning, no one would be able to blame An Lin anyway.
You Mu was all smiles as he read through the well-wishes. “Thank you all for your support and encouragement! I’m heading off to prepare now. Don’t forget to smash the like button when you see my handsome self defend against the Lightning Tribulation!”
An Lin: “…”
You Mu was almost about to face the terrifying Lightning Tribulation, yet he still didn’t forget about tips and likes… Was undergoing tribulations that exciting?
The cultivators in the chat all echoed their agreement. The atmosphere was especially lively.
Battle Goddess Bi Qiong couldn’t help but turn her gaze toward An Lin’s phone. She secretly started to watch the live stream.
She knew how to use mobile phones, yet she was contemptuous about using human technology. Thus, she didn’t join any cultivator chat or whatnot. Right now, however, she couldn’t contain her curiosity.
An hour quickly flew by.
Dark clouds gathered above the mountaintop, and golden lightning flashed through the sky.
“Look, Master is about to undergo his tribulation!” Enlightened Divine Talisman yelled in excitement. “You guys can help by smashing the like button and sending tips over. Amid the mystical unknown, your well-wishes will transform into a power that aids Master in defending against the tribulation!”
He stood one thousand meters away from You Mu, and he used his phone to capture the surrounding environment.
The cultivators in the chat responded by smashing the like button and sending over tips.
Golden Jade: “For every ten strikes of Lightning Tribulation that You Mu survives, I’ll tip one million yuan!”
The Savior: “For every ten strikes of Lightning Tribulation that You Mu survives, I’ll tip a luxury sports car!”
Tian Lingling: “For every ten strikes of Lightning Tribulation that You Mu survives, I’ll tip one spirit stone!”
…
One after another, the cultivators all expressed their support.
A brilliant smile bloomed on Enlightened Divine Talisman’s face as he read through the cultivators’ promises.
An Lin: “…”
Sure enough, there’s something wrong with this group chat!
Perhaps this tribulation was a relatively important one. White Spirit Snake, Bi Qiong, Battle God Zi Yang, Da Bai, and Xuanyuan Cheng all gathered around to witness this historic moment in Earth’s cultivation history.
“Little Bai, aren’t you a member of this group chat as well? Why aren’t you watching on your own phone?” An Lin was slightly confused.
“Senior An Lin’s phone is better! I like watching it on Senior An Lin’s phone!”
An Lin: “…”
Just like that, the group of extremely powerful and influential cultivators huddled around An Lin’s phone and stared intently at the live stream. This scene was comical yet natural.
Finally, the first bolt of Golden Void Lightning arced through the sky and crashed toward Daoist You Mu’s head.
Boom!
A deafening rumble reverberated throughout heaven and earth.
Even though they were watching it through a screen, the cultivators were still given a fright by the terrifying bolt of lightning.
A golden light filled the entire space.
Crack…
The phone’s screen flashed with a golden glow.
Then, the gold turned to black!
“What’s going on?” Battle Goddess Bi Qiong exclaimed in astonishment. “Why is it pitch-black? Is it a dark element Divine Lightning?”
An Lin: “…
“Silly girl, the live stream has lost connection!”
[1] Tian Lingling, Di Lingling is the phonetic spelling of an incantation/spell. It’s something like abracadabra.
Advertisement
- In Serial29 Chapters
Hero's Carnage
Lucas is a homeless teenager who had everything taken away from him— his family, his home, his childhood. Even worse, he was born without any abilities in a world where humans with superpowers dominate.All of that would change when a new dungeon appears before Lucas.Thinking that it was a sign the gods have given him— that he should just give up and end himself, Lucas enters this dungeon without hesitation while expecting death.However, inside the dungeon was not the end like Lucas had expected.Instead, it was the beginning of his life of carnage.Wielding the power of a «Hero», Lucas begins his journey of vengeance on the world that stole everything from him.
8 508 - In Serial85 Chapters
Transposition
Please note: the Sexual Content tag is there due to a single brief plot-relevant scene, which has a warning at the beginning. For other details, read the full description below. Rating breakdown, since that should be public info: 5 x 5*, 2 x 4.5*, 1 x 0.5* During a blackout, a frail and ragged old woman stops to ask for a glass of water from a backyard barbecue party. Given a good supper instead, she looks around the group, and tells them, "Be who and what you truly are." Days later, seven of the people from the barbecue find themselves drawn into a trap laid by a pair of wizards and their accomplices, who kidnap them into a bubble reality. All seven, who have known each other all their lives, are informed that they are not in fact entirely human: they have active fae blood, due to a series of conditions culminating with the blessing of the elderly fae woman. The transformation into fae form comes as a shock: all seven, whether originally female or male, find themselves now unreasonably beautiful women. More urgent even than that, though, is their captivity. Getting back to the real world is a higher priority than this metamorphosis that rapidly begins to feel natural... but this is only the first step, as the diverse types of fae blood they carry begin to surface. With no resources except themselves, how can they escape this prison? If they succeed, how can they possibly reclaim their lives? Just how many other faelings have been kidnapped, anyway, and what happened to them? And is there a way to make sure that their captors never put anyone else through this? Back in the real world, Kayla, who learned long ago to trust her gut instincts, is absolutely certain that something is very wrong. The pattern in the list of missing friends is easy to spot, but makes no sense at all. Then a young woman turns up at the backyard gate who knows more than she should, and even though her explanation makes even less sense, every instinct tells Kayla that Riley is her only way to get them back. If they're not quite what they were, well, that's a bridge to cross later... Just a little note: I'm a big believer in endings that are upbeat but not candy-coated, and not a fan of grim-and-gritty or of glamorized violence. These are adults in a difficult situation. However, no one gets raped, and the physical violence is, all things considered, fairly minimal. There is some harassment, sexual and otherwise, and also some mild restraint and mild verbal abuse. Complicating factors are generally wizardly or fae in nature. If I need to warn you about gender in this being all over the map, some of it reality-based rather than fantasy-based, highly diverse sexuality, or that there is (especially later) some indirect fetish/BDSM imagery and honest character discussion, then you probably should just avoid everything I write. :-) Also available on Scribble Hub.
8 186 - In Serial21 Chapters
Is Lucas Destined to Die in the New World?
Lucas imagined himself doing grander things in life; after all, he put in his own blood, sweat, and tears, and got himself a master's degree in English. Maybe he'd be the next best-selling author, or maybe the most popular late night TV show host. However, life didn't give him anything more than a management position at the local burger joint. Day in and day out, he flipped burgers, swept floors, and made weekly schedules that his employees ignored. All he had known for the past five years of his life was pure misery. Then after one night of drunken revelry, he found himself in an unfamiliar world, but he knew all the gimmicks. He knew these stories had quirks he could manipulate- he could put all his stats into magic and become the best wizard in the world, or he could dump all his stats into strength and become a veritable warrior. But once again, just like Earth, this new world seemed to have different plans for him. Instead, he was given a luck stat of 0 and a skill that forced him into danger where there should have been none. Why is this nerdy, magical paradise trying to kill him? Content warnings are there to give me some creative legroom later. There's not an excess of any gruesome content in the story, and what is there is tastefully sprinkled in. This is a LitRPG. Updates are twice a week on Mon/Fri plus some extras here and there.
8 111 - In Serial30 Chapters
Looking for the Sun
Somewhere among the myriad worlds there is one which has lost its sun. All the hydrogen's still there at the centre of the solar system, where the sun used to be, but the world is in darkness and will eventually die if something is not done. Kite is following a trail of changes across worlds - changed laws, changed histories, changed lives; hoping to locate the missing sun and return it. But the very act of searching will change more than she could imagine...
8 219 - In Serial141 Chapters
The Criminals
It is the year 2022, and some important leaders of the world have decided to create artificial islands because the population has started to multiply so fast for some reason and also, people have started to move there to have peaceful lives and no crimes, but some criminals have started to move there to create problems because they need the money and the police their arent as efficient as the ones on America or Europe. And on this series, you will see the story of two characters who will face these criminals and fight against them. Warning:This series is a parody of the real world and do not intend to make fun of the people from other countries, Gen Z, Gold Diggers. Karens, Yakuzas, Mexicans, Americans, Dogs, Cats, Woman, Man, Homosexuals, First Arc:A guy called Alex comes in Ruby City, a place where everything is almost possible, even for a guy like Alex who gave up on studying and came here to work for his cousin, who owns a restaurant called ”Luigi's Pizzeria ”. What he doesn't know about this place, will shock him. He thought this place will be nice and no big rate of violence and criminal activity, but he was so damn wrong on this one. Second Arc:A cannabis farmer comes into the countryside of Ruby City to sell his goods for a few years. But one day, when autumn has come, Ramirez had to sell all his goods for some reason and the only reliable person who can help is Gary Smith, also known as his best friend. Note: This short story is available on Webnovel, and I will also be posting on RoyalRoad to gain some feedbacks Webnovel account name: Septic_Red Webnovel account link: https://www.webnovel.com/profile/4311650220?appId=10 Webnovel story link: https://www.webnovel.com/book/the-criminals_17151667305650205
8 219 - In Serial15 Chapters
Primorial Demon
What if Iruma never was a human bit an angel and fell down from heaven? What if he lost all memories of being an angel? What if Sullivan finds him in the underworld and takes him in because he knew that a demon with a kind heart but no wings wouldn't survive? What if the teachers find out about the wingless situation? Well let's find out!A/N:This is a welcome to demon school Iruma-kun fanstory and I have no idea where this is gonna go ... hope you enjoy! Please also feel free to correct my bad writing.Rights on the pictures go to the artist.I do not own Welcome to demon school Iruma-kun, rights to the owner.
8 202
Prev Chap
Next Chap
Chap List
Boy
Girl
