"You don't have to win."

Rapid fast words in a silent breathless whisper to my left. I heard it, perking my ears up like I just heard someone mention my name… but when I went ahead and scoured around for the source, I only saw everything and everyone as they were.

Tyler up on his podium, keeping the masses in awe with promises of a grand spectacle guaranteed. The other champions on the field, standing idly by… kicking up dirt, exchanging glances, having small talks, passing the time by doing everything they can that didn't have anything to do with staring straight at what's right in front of them.

To be fair, I'd probably have done the same. If I was in their shoes over there, and if one of them were in my shoes over here… yeah, I'd be looking for ways to distract myself too.

One princess as an escort leading you side by side was already a luxury of an experience enough. But then you throw in another one, also guiding you close as close could possibly get… and not even the most temptation-free being this side of the Milky Way would be able to resist wanting to fling a cosmic metal chair over my head.

"It's okay if you lose, we both won't mind."

There again were those lightspeed sentences, reaching and leaving one end of my ear to the other like a bullet train running on railgun tracks. However, narrowing down the prime suspect was a far easier ordeal this time.

After all, the culprit wasn't calling me Master.

I turned left, where the very essence of high etiquette greeted my sights. Amanda had her gloved hands folded down the middle of her gown, her face held high up to like an expressionless doll, blinking slow vacant blinks to the crowd around us.

I smiled, and unlike her, I prefer keeping my words actually comprehendible to human capabilities, "You're a quick tune changer, aren't you? Do you want me to fight for you or not?"

"Fight for me…" Her eyes stayed a distant empty gaze, but her lips parted open ever so slightly, "Fairly."

"You asked for this."

"I take it back."

"Take it back?" I shook my head at her. "Sorry your highness, can't always get what you want. You wanted my answer, I'm giving you my answer."

"Answer received," Fleetingly, her eyes met mine. "Now please, if you don't want to do this, don't. I didn't mean for things to get so out of hand. But then you did what you did, and now - everyone's looking to humiliate you, and I don't want to see that. I know you don't like attention on you."

"Despise it, actually," I said. "And yet… still I'm here, how did this happen?"

"Exactly," She looked away again. "You don't have to have all those eyes on you now. I didn't mean for that. Instead of seeing you as an equal contender, they're seeing you as a joke."

"At least I'm already dressed for the occasion."

"Stop joking," Her brow twitched. "Don't do this if you don't want to do this, I'll understand."

"Oh wow-wow-wow, listen here..." I eyed her closely, seeing just the slightest fracture in her stoic high-and-might act turning bigger and broader. "That guilt I'm hearing? From the princess of pettiness herself? I never would have thought..."

"I-I get it already," She was starting to flush brightly, and she seemed seriously annoyed at the fact that she was. "Y-you like me too, okay, I… I see that now. So you can stop, you've proven yourself already."

"Proven myself? Why, your highness, in case you haven't noticed I'm still at the starting point," My lips turned to a half-frown half-smirk mishmash that probably didn't look as cool as I thought it did. "I still have to reach the finish line, don't I?"

"Augh…" She blinked hard. "I can't believe this is actually happening."

Amanda can groan and sigh away to her heart's content all she wants, I know I was only hearing half of her true sentiments. The other half was locked away, kept under lock and key behind that stony-faced expression there, and why? Simple, the bold brash princess of the land had a shy side too.

"And you can't believe you're enjoying it so much, can you?"

But sometimes, and only sometimes, the shy side would show.

"Too much," She whispered, lightning-fast once more.

-------

It was a short walk that ended quick, a blink-and-you-might-miss-it stroll between carriages to reach the one appointed as my own. The carriages were arranged in the typical racing formation - first being first, second being second, third being third, and so on and so forth, until we finally reached lucky number thirteen. Me.

Dead last.

Didn't matter, didn't care, I hopped onto the front all the same, and took hold of those reins firm and tight. Below on the ground, my royal escorts stared up at me, staying, standing.

I wasn't sure if they're even supposed to linger.

"You keep loitering around me, then they're really gonna be out to get me," I told them, trying to reassure any lingering doubts with a smile. "I'll be fine, next to dying… this is a stroll in the park."

Now that I mention, didn't I also almost die taking a stroll in the park to Sera? Let's just ignore that, shall we? Let's not ruin the simile.

"Just… don't push yourself too much," Amanda said, gripping onto her hands tighter than I did my reins, "I really do not want you to get hurt because I'm a stupid impulsive idiot."

"I won't deny that," I said, turning towards her. "But here's something you oughta know, just because you're a princess now doesn't mean everything has to revolve around you."

She blinked a few times, each one rousing a confusion in her eyes more prominent than the last. "Huh?"

"What I mean is, I'm not just fighting this fight completely for you or for Ash either," I drew my eyes forward, straight, towards the championship lineup staring straight back at me. "Sometimes it's nice to do something for yourself too every once in a while."

"Admirable..." She said, nodding her head. "Still, my request remains unchanged. Don't take things too far, alright?"

"Yeah, yeah," I responded with a hearty bow, assuaging her worries. "Wish is my command, your highness. Now go shoo already, got a race to win now."

Wasn't sure if I was all that convincing, but regardless if I was or not, she moved on away anyway, her head up high once more, her stare blank as a doll.

Now it was only Ash that remained, Ash that stayed. Silent all this while, but not anymore, peculiarity a sparkling glint in her emerald eyes.

"Has something happened, Master?"

"Has it?" I chuckled. "I'm holding the reins of a horse, on top of a wooden carriage, about to go on to compete in a race for your honor. I'm pretty sure something has happened alright..."

"Aside from the obvious," She narrowed her eyes, narrowed her lips, her head teetering slightly left. "It feels as if there's a change in your demeanor, your… disposition. A certain arrogance to your tone, if you don't mind my saying."

"Is there now?" I raised my brows at her. "That a bad thing?"

"That remains to be seen," She leaned her head back upright. "Otherwise… I think a little arrogance suits you quite well."

"I'll take that as a compliment, then," I smiled, waving a hand. "Now, I suppose you also better get going now. I'll see you at the finish line, alright?"

She returned the gesture, bowing once before departing. "Very well. I shall await your triumph over the others, Mast - erm, I mean - Big man. I know well you won't seek to disappoint."

Always so supportive, always so encouraging. A beautiful smile that was brimming with both with nary an inkling of doubt. Seriously, everybody needs an Ash in their life. Might be the only way to true world peace at this point.

Eventually, in a slow gradual fashion, the princesses guided the rest of their champions, filling the remaining twelve carriages with the rest of the twenty-four champions, sorting them out one by one into the twelve teams of two.

Then there's me. The thirteenth carriage, the thirteenth team, comprising of the only one and only. Well, if anything, if I really wanted to have a silver lining to this predicament, then I guess my horse was rather amicable… she allowed me to stroke her mane, and even neighed a gentle neigh in delight.

Silver mane, too. Green eyes, too. Hmm…

I could say something about this. But I don't think I will. Anyway, moving on… since I have a considerable amount of downtime before the race actually began, I thought it only wise to assess this precious cargo I was to be protected with my life, and see if I could come up with a strat to keep them safe and out of harm's way.

So I turned around.

Then I turned back again.

Then I took a long deep breath, amassing as much oxygen for the next time I looked back again.

Eventually, I looked back again. Then there went all that oxygen, funneled out from pursed lips like a kettle reaching a boiling point. I think my brain was just about there as well.

Precious cargo, Tyler said. Defend at all cost, Tyler said. Should have known, should have guessed.

Who the hell else would consider these things precious? Who the hell else would consider these things worth defending at all cost?

Fucking…

Body pillows.

Eshwlyn to the right, staring at me meekly in a pose so timid, her armor stripped only to the bare minimum, her slivery-white hair strewn all over the fabric.

Then to the left, Princess Riona, the princess Amanda was cosplaying… her royal gown very nearly stripped away, her smile an inviting one, her stare a seduction one, locks of her sandy blonde hair running down her body, and just a single strand away from something scandalous.

To the side, I spotted sealed buckets of colored paint - and that was when everything clicked for me.

This was our cargo, and that was our weapon. This was what we were supposed to be transporting, and that was supposed to be our weapons. Us drivers, escorting our princesses unharmed all the way, and us defenders, staving away any paint that came our way.

And I was supposed to do both.

But why paint?

Why body pillows?

Why those types of body pillows?!

Who's gonna wanna defend those?!

Hmm...

Well, I suppose it would be quite a shame if the fabric got stained. Paint's hard to wash away, after all.

People work hard making those things too. It'd be a shame… ruining all that effort in one fell swoop. It'd be quite unfortunate indeed.

Hmm…

Alright, fuck it, don't worry your scantily-clad highnesses, this lowly knight here is gonna keep you pure and unblemished. At least, physically… metaphorically, I dunno if you guys want that.

But I digress, whatever.

Let's just get on with this race already.