Ze Tian Ji Chapter 12

Chapter 12 – A Friend That Makes Others Speechless (I)

Chapter 12 – A Friend That Makes Others Speechless (I)

Translated by: Hypersheep325

Edited by: Michyrr

Chen Changsheng had said ‘order what you want’. In Tang Thirty-Six’s view, the words ‘order what you want’ could equally mean ordering whatever dish he wanted or interacting with him whenever he wanted. Filled with sympathy for Chen Changsheng, Tang Thirty-Six did not pay much attention to price when he ordered dishes. Taking up the menu, he casually ordered a few of the inn’s signature dishes. The first two dishes were flying sparrow soup and a steamed two-headed fish…as he was ordering, he glimpsed that Chen Changsheng’s brow was creased. Thinking that he didn’t have enough money, Tang Thirty-Six felt a little regretful. He said to the waiter, “I don’t need the double-headed fish anymore, switch it out for a perch. And also…switch the flying sparrow soup for water shield soup.”

Just as expected, Chen Changsheng’s brows relaxed.

Tang Thirty-Six smiled, thinking to himself, I really can observe everything down to the smallest detail and have a good understanding of others. He casually said, “Also add on a bowl of plum blossom dumplings with deer meat filling.”

Chen Changsheng wrinkled his brow.

Tang Thirty-Six glanced at him, then said, “Change that to…bring a bowl of braised pork.”

Chen Changsheng’s brow was still wrinkled.

Tang Thirty-Six was rather displeased. He thought to himself, it’s a bowl of fatty pork; on a normal day at home, I would even be too lazy to eat it, and you still aren’t willing to pay for it?

He said to the waiter, “Bring over a plate of cold fishwort in sauce! And add on a plate of pig ears in chili oil!”

Chen Changsheng still had that same appearance, his face brimming with disapproval.

Tang Thirty-Six was really quite annoyed now. He said, “It seems like this is your first time treating someone else to a meal and you don’t quite understand the ways of the world, so I won’t say anything about it.”

Chen Changsheng was a little surprised. He asked, “Where was I wrong?”

Tang Thirty-Six scolded, “Just because you don’t have enough money doesn’t mean you should show such an expression in front of your guest! It really makes people irritated! Since you’re a man, your head can be cut, your blood can flow, but you must never lose face! Even if in a little while you have to sell off your big furskin coat, so what?”

He had believed this reasoning of his to be very proper and thought the feeling of teaching a friend to be rather nice. Chen Changsheng, on the other hand, felt it to be somewhat weird. He asked, “Is this what it means to slap your face to make it look more imposing?”

Tang Thirty-Six was a little incensed at these words and asked, “Where did these words come from?”

“This is a common saying in Xining,” Chen Changsheng sincerely explained.

Tang Thirty-Six was stunned as he thought to himself, is this what I was asking about? Just as he was about to fly into rage, he heard Chen Changsheng say something else.

“…Also, I don’t have a big furskin coat.”

The room became somewhat quiet.

Tang Thirty-Six forgot about getting angry. He thought that this matter was truly far too distressing and this kid was really too pitiable.

He had only seen elders and senior brothers of his clan and school who were down on their luck frequently taking up their furskins and exchanging them for wine and food, but no one had ever told him how people who were so poor to not even have this would treat someone to a meal without losing face. As for him…in the first place, he had never lacked for money. Secondly, he had never treated anyone to a meal before.

He looked at Chen Changsheng and firmly said, “I will treat you for this meal.”

Chen Changsheng found this a little odd and asked, “Why?”

Tang Thirty-Six gazed at him with a gentle expression. “You don’t have a big fur coat, so you definitely don’t have any other valuable things. How could I let you treat me?”

Somewhat innocently, Chen Changsheng said, “But…I do have the money.”

……

……

The scene once again became awkward.

Tang Thirty-Six had a rather ugly look on his face. He asked, “Then previously when I was ordering food, why was your expression so nasty?”

Chen Changsheng recalled the previous scene and comprehended what was going on. Rather embarrassed, he explained, “Because…you ordered flying sparrow soup, famous for being very warm and known for its excessive dry properties. In the autumn and winter, it’s very helpful, but now it’s spring. Drinking this sort of soup can easily cause an excess of heat and isn’t good for the body.”

For this kid to be considering these sorts of questions was completely out of Tang Thirty-Six’s expectations. He asked, “Could it be that all the other dishes are no good too? Those are all signature dishes though.”

“The double-headed fish is a fish from the deep ocean, living off a diet of fish, shrimp, and sea snakes, so its body has accumulated a lot of poison. It would be fine if it were boiled in water, and it would be perfectly fine as soup, but to steam it in broth is not healthy. In addition, we are just two people, and too many meat dishes is also unhealthy. Especially the braised pork, which uses the pork belly. It’s far too fatty, so it’s best not to eat it.”

Finally, Chen Changsheng added, “The pig ears in chili oil really are rather good, but chili oil really isn’t. As for the fishwort, eating too much will upset the stomach and disorder the heart. For the body, it’s also…”

“Stop!”

Tang Thirty-Six couldn’t hear anymore—Chen Changsheng’s words were like a fly, buzzing round and round his ear, making him feel very uncomfortable. Anyone would become unhappy if they were happily ordering food and heard the phrase ‘it’s not healthy’ repeated so many times—it was naturally impossible for every type of food to be healthy, but who would pay attention to these things when eating? And to focus on it with such severity? If Chen Changsheng were some old man who valued his health, that would be fine, but he was clearly just a fourteen-year-old youth…

“So what if it’s not good for your body? Don’t tell me I’ll die if I eat it?”

Chen Changsheng earnestly said, “You won’t die on the spot, but you’ll definitely die a little earlier.”

Tang Thirty-Six felt like he had nothing to reply to this. Very curious, he asked, “Then what do you eat normally?”

Chen Changsheng replied, “Two taels of meat, beef or lamb being best; two catties of vegetables, wild herbs being best; sweet potatoes and grains can be eaten at will; every two days, I eat one freshwater fish, with scales is best; lastly, I don’t drink soup.”

Tang Thirty-Six asked, “How long have you eaten this way?”

Chen Changsheng replied, “From the moment I could remember, I’ve always eaten this way.”

This time it was Tang Thirty-Six’s turn to wrinkle his brow.

He felt that these foods even sounded bad. If he really ate these for fourteen years, just how miserable of a life would that be?

He felt himself sympathizing more and more with this kid.

……

……

As they ate, the two were very quiet. Tang Thirty-Six felt that the dishes were too ordinary while Chen Changsheng felt that the dishes were too unhealthy. In brief, they were each dissatisfied in their own way. Of course, it was impossible to reconcile these two matters. The flavor of food and the pursuit of health was always the area of the three outlooks of humans with the fiercest clashes.

(TN: The three outlooks are the outlook of the world, the outlook of life, and the outlook of value.)

Just like this, Chen Changsheng’s first time treating someone to a meal hastily concluded. With two full cups of tea in front of them, the two casually chatted about the contents of the Heavenly Dao Academy’s entrance exam. Tang Thirty-Six also asked about the particulars of Chen Changsheng’s experiences at the Star Seizer Academy and the other two schools. He displayed his incomprehension and doubt about how the Great Zhou military could also be influenced by the Divine General’s estate. Afterwards, they ran out of things to talk about.

Newly acquainted friends in their first few conversations would always give stories from their childhood and their experiences growing up, seeking some common hobby. However, the stories that could be told by these two from their childhoods were so dull and monotonous they could make someone rise up in anger, so it was impossible for them to do this. In order to avoid the excessive embarrassment of looking each other in the eyes without anything to say, Tang Thirty-Six stood up and began walking around the room with his cup of tea. As he paced from the living room to the balcony and back, he thought, for this kid to be able afford such a large room with such high rent so close to the Mausoleum of Books, it’s obvious that he’s not lacking in money. My previous misunderstanding was truly rather ridiculous.

When he wandered up to the display stand in the living room, Tang Thirty-Six’s gaze inadvertently fell on the stand and found it impossible to pull away—there was a sword there.

That sword was very delicate, not much longer than an ordinary dagger. Moreover, it was very slender and gave off a very graceful air. The sheath was an ordinary leather sheath and the hilt of the sword was very ordinary. It gave off a thoroughly ordinary air without any place that could attract a gaze, and it lacked any dust or bloodstains. In brief, this sword was ordinary to the extreme, and yet it made him want to get close to it.

Tang Thirty-Six stretched out his hand to grip the dagger.

Chen Changsheng’s hand obstructed him, gripping the handle of the dagger before he could.

Tang Thirty-Six glanced at him.

Chen Changsheng looked back at him and said, “This is mine.”

Tang Thirty-Six was still holding the teacup. As the steam wafted up from the teacup, his handsome face amidst the steam seemed all the colder. “So I can’t touch it?”

Chen Changsheng noticed that he was rather unhappy and somewhat uneasy, but he continued to persist, “You should first ask me. After I agree, you can hold it.”

Tang Thirty-Six drew back his right hand, flicked his sleeve and returned to his seat, placing the teacup in front of him on the table.

Chen Changsheng was somewhat embarrassed, feeling that he had done something wrong—actually, he didn’t really think he had done something wrong, but this was his first friend after all. When he saw his friend being unhappy, he felt rather confused. Walking up to the table, he offered the dagger in his hand.

Tang Thirty-Six raised his head and glanced at him, then continued to ignore him.

Chen Changsheng moved the dagger even closer.

Tang Thirty-Six refused to take the dagger and said, “You do things without the slightest grace.”

Chen Changsheng was helpless. He thought to himself, just who is lacking in grace here? Just who is acting all ill-tempered like a small child? He couldn’t do anything except return to the stand and put the dagger back. Turning his head, he asked, “Did you come find me for something?”

“In the capital, since I’ve gotten to know a person like you, after hearing about this matter of yours, I would naturally come to see. There’s no need to thank me, I’m just that sort of passionate and generous person.” With an indifferent expression, Tang Thirty-Six continued, “Of course, on the basis that I relatively admire you, you must know that I admire very few of my peers. You should feel honored.”

Chen Changsheng was stunned and said, “Then…thank you?”

“Is saying thank you enough?”

“Didn’t I just treat you to a meal?”

Tang Thirty-Six stood and said to him, “I’ve decided to accept you as my younger brother.”

Chen Changsheng asked, “What does it mean to be your younger brother?”

Tang Thirty-Six very sincerely explained, “It means that from now on, you’ll follow me as I mess around.”

Chen Changsheng very sincerely explained, “That’s not okay, I still have a lot of things to do. I don’t have any time to give you.”

Tang Thirty-Six was a very proud youth and took pity on Chen Changsheng as an unrecognized talent, this being the reason he would visit him at this inn. Since Chen Changsheng would not accept, he naturally had nothing more to say. He was just somewhat puzzled. “What things? Continuing to take entrance exams? Just why do you need to get into these schools? What’s the reason for your persistence?”

Chen Changsheng asked, “And you? What’s your goal in the capital?”

“I want to take part in the Grand Examination, to take first place,” Tang Thirty-Six declared proudly.

Suddenly, he remembered that young Phoenix in the south at Holy Maiden Peak. If she were to come back ahead of time…

“I want to take second place in the Grand Examination.”

He corrected himself, but then he abruptly remembered Qiushan Jun. If that person participated in this year’s Grand Examination…

“Fine, my goal is third place in the Grand Examination.”

Tang Thirty-Six finally confirmed, “But in the end, what I want to do is inscribe my name on the monolith in front of the Mausoleum of Books.”

“Really far-reaching and ambitious. Admirable, admirable.”

Chen Changsheng sighed in admiration, then suddenly thought of a certain matter. “Then won’t you have to change your name to Tang Three?”

Tang Thirty-Six couldn’t find a response, so he changed the subject. “And you? Just what is your goal in coming to the capital?”

Chen Changsheng honestly said, “I also want to take part in the Grand Examination.”

Tang Thirty-Six hadn’t really imagined this, but he wasn’t too shocked.

Chen Changsheng replied, “I’ve never thought about second or third place.”

Tang Thirty-Six advised, “People truly have to know themselves, but you can’t lose your self-confidence. Don’t forget, you just need to enter the three banners of the Grand Examination to be able to enter the Mausoleum of Books…”

Speaking up to this point, his voice abruptly came to a halt, because Chen Changsheng once again spoke.

“I want to take first place.”

Chen Changsheng looked at him and said, “I can’t take second or third. I can only take first.”

Silence.

Tang Thirty-Six was suddenly taken with the impulse to turn and leave.

He realized that today, he had often strayed into circumstances that made him speechless.

Because the things this kid did, the words that he said, often made him speechless and want to spit blood.