Now, what am I supposed to do?

Melly thoughts churned furiously as the strange man Clemiticus skipped closely behind her. What was his purpose? Did he even have one? All of those essential questions, unfortunately, paled compared to the biggest of all.

Why, oh why, was he wearing two halves of a dead wolf as shoes?

He had said they had given him three stamina. Whatever that meant.

The two of them, now unlikely travelling companions, made their way through the path that Melly herself had traversed that very morning. The grassy fields had quickly disappeared behind trees as the two strode through a dense forest. Their destination ahead was none other than Melly's home. A calm and peaceful place called Lobee Village.

Look away. Keep walking. Faster!

Her mind went into panic mode. Somewhere inside her brain, another voice yelled.

You should run! Why aren't you running! Run away from him, you idiot!

"So! Did I end up telling you my name? It's Clemiticus, BTW!"

He spoke as he jogged happily behind her. His blonde ear-length hair bounced as he moved with a smug grin on his face. His sparkly green eyes darted about, enjoying the complete experience. The man was handsome and muscular. However, somehow, she instinctively felt uneasy around the man. He was one of those 'wild card' types.

Melly sighed.

"Yeah, I heard it. Now please get away from me!"

"Oh, you did? So, what's your name, then?" He continued jogging, ignoring the disapproval in her tone.

Melly’s jaw tightened. This guy didn’t get it. He wasn’t listening.

She groaned. "It's Melly - alright? Now can you leave me?"

"Nelly?"

"No. Meh lee." she spoke slowly as if to a simpleton. "With an M."

"Oh, Melly. With an EMMM."

He mimicked her exaggerated pronunciation with a sideways wink.

“I wonder if I can turn name tags on. Hey Fairy? How do I do that?”

The fairy floated beside the frolicking man and smiled.

“Shall I turn them on for you, Master?”

“Yeah, do it! I want to see all the stats and stuff. Oh, there we go! I can see them now and it says Melly’s class is villager.”

Melly turned to him and imagined how satisfying it would be to smack him across the face. Unfortunately, her joyous fantasy was cut short. Her glare focused her attention on the new Shoes he had recently gained. They barely fitted and had almost lost resemblance to the menacing creature it once been.

"How can you even walk in those?"

"Easy! See!" He surged forward to walk beside her. "Just one foot after the..."

His eyes bulged as the tail from his left shoe caught and tripped over his other foot.

Before she could react, the man fell towards her. The world slowed with her heightened sense of panic. She only had two options. On her right was a nice, comfortable bed of beautiful yellow and blue flowers. The sun shone down over them, inviting her to join them in a warm, wonderful, and soft embrace, just like home. On her left were dark shadows, a deep sense of foreboding followed by a jagged cliff full of brambles, dirt, and death.

Her instinct went into overdrive as she leant her entire being towards the comfy, welcoming landing. She felt a thrill of success as her body shifted in the right direction.

Suddenly a huge clumsy arm grabbed her waist. Clemiticus overpowered Melly and, within a few awkward shuffling moments, sent the two of them tumbling in the opposite direction.

"For!" she screamed; they plummeted down the path of pain. "Fucks! Ugh! Sake!"

Each word came out with a cacophony of bangs, crashes and thuds as their bodies mashed over rocks, logs and muck.

Bing!

“Clemiticus has just entered the zone: Ogre Wastes!”

They both landed in a pool of mud, with cries of confusion and pain. For some strange reason, the noise they made sounded more like a growl, but Melly had much more important things to focus on. For one, she was covered in muck and her brain hadn't yet registered the significance of what the hell just happened.

"Agghhh! Idiot! What did you do?"

She spun around to look at him, flicking a line of slippery mud with her now unrecognisable hair. Clemiticus lay upside-down with his head covered by his filth-soaked shirt. It was at that moment that she froze. There was something odd on his stomach.

He was so different from other men in her villager. With a lean and muscular build to the point of perfection. There were no scars, no moles or even hair. And the most peculiar thing was his belly button.

Instead of the usual navel, there was an odd-looking symbol. It was a circle with flat squares protruding from its outer edge. Melly recognised it as a cog you would find in a mechanical thing. It was her father who had taught her about such mechanisms.

Why did this man have one on his stomach?

"What is that?" She pointed to the peculiar ornament.

Clemiticus flipped himself upright and tore his shirt from his face. An idiotic grinning expression appeared from behind his dirty top. He followed the direction of Melly's confusion and looked over his naked belly with a crooked eyebrow.

"Oh. Nice job! You found the menu!"

He grinned, then hefted himself up onto a fallen log. Clemiticus ignored the strange noise the wood gave off and poked himself in the button. The gear spun around thrice.

"Sweet!”

He looked up at Melly and pointed at something invisible. "Oh damn! Just what Fairy said, I’m level two! Easy game!”

"Level two? What do you mean game?"

"Yeah, yeah. Level two already!" he said, ignoring her question. "And look, I can accept an escort quest. It says, to deliver Melly to her village."

"What? Wait! No! No quests or games!"

He continued to read something invisible. "Rewards include character experience, more quests and even a follower!"

"Experience? Follower? Please slow down you’re not making any sense!"

“Fairy, my happy little friend.”

“Master?”

“Is there any information about this follower?”

Melly was baffled. As far as she was concerned, the two of them might as well be talking with their heads underwater or in some foreign language. None of it made any sense.

She closed her eyes as she felt a headache coming on. The picture of home floated in her mind as she imagined hearing her father's voice in her ear Walk away!

"Oh, look! If I finish the quest, I can invite you to a party!"

"D, don’t!" she stammered.

Bing!

"Clemiticus has accepted the quest: Escort Melly!"

Suddenly, a low rumbling sound echoed all around them. The strange muddy pit they had landed in swirled and shook. The log that Clemiticus had been sitting on shifted, toppling him over Melly. They frantically tussled in the mud as the clumsy Clemiticus apologised.

“Sorry Melly, my bad! The controls are way too realistic!”

Then a colossal form rose out of the muck.

Bing!

“Clemiticus has started the event: Ambush in the swamp!”

“Uh oh! My bad!”

A massive bald head looked at them with three eyes. Its ugly face was without a nose but had a wide mouth with two yellow teeth.

“What’s that noise?” asked Melly.

“I think it’s bloody laughing!”

It was.

"Yummy people! Food time!"

The three eyed monster let out a chuckle then swiped at the duo. Melly shot from under the weight of her annoying companion and struggled to gain ground. Clemiticus gingerly stood upright and lazily dodged the monster's arm as if it were by accident.

“Hell yeah! Easy dodge! I put all my bonus stats into Luck!”

This new information only confused Melly even more.

Clemiticus glanced above the monstrous creature and smiled.

"A level 20 swamp Ogre, aye!" He chuckled nervously. "That's way beyond me."

Why is he smiling?

The ogre took one look at Melly and decided that she was the easier meal.

"NO! Go away!"

She shrieked as the monster lunged. Her mind went back into panic mode.

"Ahhhhh!"

Melly dove to one side, landing in the mud as another heavy hand narrowly missed her.

"Scrawny dinner likes to dance!"

Clemiticus stood still on the sideline, examining the one-sided duel.

"What to do, what to do," he said, scratching his chin.

"Please! Do something!"

"Yeah, do something," the ogre said, laughing..

The blue fairy flew towards Clemiticus' shoulder and whispered something into his ear. Clem burst out laughing. The ogre, annoyed at Clemiticus' amusement, flew into a rage, and roared. It bent down, tearing a tree from the ground to swing at the blonde simpleton.

Clemiticus ignored the threat and looked down at his feet. The large tree soared overhead as he bent down to scoop up an oddly shaped rock.

“This should do the trick!”

Clemiticus flicked his wrist and hurled the small object towards the three eyed ogre. Melly's jaw dropped as the projectile bounced harmlessly off the monster's shin and rolled away.

Bing!

"Clemiticus has learned the skill: Throw object."

"Hahaha! Puny person!" The Ogre chuckled as its face bent in a wickedly repulsive smile.

The blue fairy looked above the ogre's head and turned to Clemiticus with a tiny thumbs up.

The smug adventurer then crossed his arms and grinned.

Instead of jeering back, the Ogre’s face lost all humour.

“What’s happening puny person?”

The ogre grasped its throat and let out a pained howl. With one last shuddering breath, the ogre's eyes rolled to the back of its head and toppled over. Dead.

Bing!

"Clemiticus has defeated the Three eyed Ogre! Congratulations!"

“Clemiticus has gained a significant amount of combat experience for defeating such a difficult enemy!”

Clemiticus laughed.

Melly gasped. "You've got to be kidding me! What on Fanswald was that thing you threw?"

Bing!

"Clemiticus has reached level six!”

"Hell yeah!”

Melly moved forward and scooted around the large dead ogre. She searched furiously for the supposed stone that had killed the monster.

It has to be some magic, she thought.

"What was that?" she asked, searching for the weapon in the mud. “There!"

She bent down and picked up the odd-looking stone. It was surprisingly light, with an odd silver-white sheen.

"You killed that massive thing with this? Was it some kind of magic trick?"

He shook his head.

"No trick!"

Clemiticus bounded over to the corpse of the swamp Ogre, his eyes shining with greed. Melly just stood still, stunned. She stared at the strange rock as Clemiticus tore away the Ogre's single item of clothing.

Bing!

“Clemiticus has looted the Three eyed Ogre’s undergarments!”

"This loincloth will make a great cape!"

Clemiticus tested the new cloak around his neck.

"Ooh, it's a rare quality with an increase in speed and camouflage. It smells a bit, and I'm not sure what those questionable stains are. Oh wait, the durability is almost zero. Boo!"

The adventurer discarded the cape and continued searching for additional loot.

"Clemiticus stop!" She turned. "What on Fanswald is this?" Melly held up the stone, demanding an explanation.

He eyed her with curiosity then smiled. It was one of those expressions an adult might reserve for a naïve child.

"You're wondering how I killed it so easily."

She nodded. "Of course! Is this magic?"

He shook his head and gave out a bark of laughter.

"No, no! The fairy told me what to do. The Ogre had barely any HP left. Around one or two percent. I think we landed on it when we fell. So, I saw its health and picked up the first thing that I could find." He chuckled. "And what d'ya know! It worked like a charm."

"So, this isn’t magic?"

"No, no." He smiled. "I do not know what it is."

The blue fairy drifted to Melly's side and scratched its chin.

"Item identification." It said as a white light swirled around the object. "Ah! Master I found out what it is!”

“Yeah?”

“It’s an Ogre’s Kidney stone!"

Melly screamed and dropped the magic ball.

"Ugh, gross!”

"Oh, that's awkward. Maybe we shouldn't keep that!" Clemiticus sidestepped over the precious artifact on the ground and wiped his hand on his trousers.

"Anywho! ONWARDS! Let's finish the Melly escort quest!"