《A City Stranded Cowboy's Robot Mercy Killing Business》What's Junji Up To?
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"Junji's late." Tala announced.
"Yeah, I noticed." Tex replied.
It was Thursday morning, the time of the meeting that Junji had said he’d come too. Tex found himself more and more anxious with each minute that passed.
"Maybe he’s dead." said Barton.
"Why would you say that?" Tex choked.
"What, he's always doing shit with black markets and killing people. That's how you fucking die."
"Could I interest you in changing the subject?”
With an empty shrug, Barton jammed a cigar in her mouth and lit it with a pocket lighter.
The thump of feet behind the closed door turned Tex’s attention to it. The door opened, and Junji rushed into the room with an outstretched briefcase and a whirl of papers.
Junji had apparently chosen to ditch his cotton sports clothes for a suit and loafers. There were bags under his eyes, although he looked as awake as ever.
"My apologies." Junji greeted as he bolted to the coffee maker. "I was in Afghanistan this morning, and I lost track of time."
"Why were you in Afghanistan?" asked Tex.
"Several reasons. There was a deal I needed to close, and a contract I needed to finalize. I had also just come from a successful heist in Iraq, so I thought it best to--"
Junji paused for a moment to stare at the clock on the wall. When the second hand reached ten, Junji stepped two feet to the right.
The sound of plaster cracking and panels coming loose was heard as a man plunged knife-first through the ceiling.
"--go to Afghanistan next." Junji finished.
Upon noticing he'd missed his target, the man who’d fallen from the ceiling swore in a language Tex didn't recognize and grabbed for a gun on his hip. Barton looked mildly put off when Tex was able to reach into his pocket for his pistol and shoot the assassin several times in the head a half second before her.
Tala coughed.
"I got some questions." Tex said as he gestured to the dead man.
"As do I." Junji replied. "Firstly, how can we make the most use of the body?"
Tala raised her hand.
"Soup kitchen." she offered.
"Excellent idea, Tala." said Junji. “But the soup kitchen would never accept a dead body, so we're now faced with the question of ‘is it worth our time to prepare his body into several inconspicuous meat pies for the shelter’."
"No, because it would be faster and more cost-efficient probably to donate the same amount of normal food as we could make from his body."
"Good point, but you fail to consider how offering this man's flesh directly as charity will have the added benefit of honoring him."
"Yeah, but what you fail to consider is if his dead body possesses any more of his honor than a cheaper, healthier meat. Like he's dead, if he had a soul it probably doesn't give a shit about his skin suit anymore."
Junji touched his chin.
"You've bested me." he said as he left the room. "I will return after I've bought eighty kilograms of meat and made use of them properly."
Two pairs of eyes turned to Tex the moment Junji had closed the door behind him.
"Tex." Tala stated.
"Hwat?" Tex replied.
"I think you should check on Junji."
Tex glanced back at the door before responding.
"Why?" asked Tex.
"We need to find out what he's planning." Tala explained.
"I don't wanna get involved."
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"I don't know if you've noticed, but Junji's plans tend to affect our lives."
"If he's in the Middle East, he's probably doing something with the aliens." Barton said.
Tex's mouth opened slightly, his jaw threatening to come unhinged.
"You believe in aliens?" he asked.
"Yeah." answered Barton. "I learned about them in the army."
"Why did you never tell us about the aliens?" Tala replied.
"They eat and shit and blow stuff up like the rest of us, I didn't think it was worth mentioning."
Tala coughed.
"Do everybody in the military know about the--aliens?" Tex wondered.
"No, just my rank and up." Barton replied.
Tex blinked.
"It's simple." Barton followed. "When I was a private, I learned that we were messing around in the Middle East to deal with some Islamic terrorist guy. When I was a Corporal, I learned that we were just getting oil. Then when I was a Sergeant, I learned that we were actually working with the Middle Eastern government for an excuse to raise tax dollars for military spending in both our countries. But now I'm a retired Lieutenant, and I learned that it's all just cause we're part of some intergalactic treaty or something."
"...Were there any ranks above you?" asked Tala.
"A couple, yeah."
"Have you considered that you might still be wrong?"
"No."
Tex scoffed when a wave of irritation carrying an unpleasant memory hit him in the chest.
"God, you sound like Lida." he said. "She--"
Tex was interrupted when Tala and Barton both started to groan.
"I was wrong. This part of the cycle's worse than the last part." Barton muttered.
"Huh?" Tex replied.
"You've been complaining about Lida for three days." Tala explained. "Call her or shut up."
Tex put his hand over his chest and winced.
"Christ, you're breaking my heart." he replied.
Barton didn't respond. Tala only shrugged.
"Like Lida did." Tex blurted.
"Get a job." said Barton.
As she spoke, Barton took the cigar out of her mouth and snubbed it on her arm. Tex raised an eyebrow when she immediately pulled out a second one.
"You should go easy with those things." he said as Barton lit the new cigar.
"I like to get hooked on them so I can quit." she replied.
By the time Junji had returned from the soup kitchen, they still hadn't moved the body.
"Did you three do nothing while I was gone?" Junji asked as he sat down at the table.
"We talked about you." answered Tala.
"What should we do with the body?" Tex wondered.
Tala snapped her fingers.
"I'll call Sean to pick me up." she said. "He lives on a pig farm."
"Use the industrial elevator, that way you won't get caught." Barton offered.
Tala nodded and took her jacket off. She then put in on the floor and lifted the dead man onto it so she could drag him along the carpet.
“Gross.” she muttered.
She managed to pull him to the door, although her laptop bag fell off her shoulder.
"Oh." said Tala. "Can someone get that?"
Tex picked Tala's bag off the floor. It wasn’t very large, so he simply added it to his own bag.
"Thanks." she followed. "Just give it back next time you see me."
“You need any help with the body?” Tex replied.
“No, that’s okay.”
Once Tala had gotten out the door, Junji shot a look through the window.
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"It's been a pleasure." Junji said to the two of them. "I must go."
Junji got up to leave, but Barton stayed put. Tex remembered the conversation they'd all had before Junji had returned.
Tex followed Junji out the door.
"Hello." Junji said, slowing down for just the tiniest moment to let Tex catch up to him.
"Howdy." Tex replied. "You, uh, you look like you're having fun."
"I am very much having fun. I've optimized my schedule so I can complete four to eight tasks at once and I've redirected seventeen assassins sent to kill me to the Buddhist Monastery."
As he spoke, Junji reached into his pants pocket and pulled out an entire eight-ball of cocaine.
"Woah!" Tex yelped.
"My apologies, I'm coming down."
As Junji worked the bag open, Tex found himself filled with dread.
"Junji?" he asked.
"Yes?"
Junji's eyes were wide with pleasant anticipation.
"You shouldn't be doing this to yourself." said Tex.
"Doing what?"
"Coke."
Tex looked over just in time for the smile to drop from Junji's face.
"I'm getting a lot of work done." Junji explained.
"And you're screwing up your brain. It ain't worth it."
"I am willing to sacrifice anything for my work. My mind falls under this category."
Although he knew the hall was empty, Tex shot a look behind them to make sure there was no one in earshot.
"If you're gonna sacrifice yourself, sacrifice yourself." Tex muttered. "But you better not make me watch you drag it out."
Junji stared at the white baggie in his hands in silence as they made their way down the stairs. Tex watched Junji's features out of the corner of his eye to see that his expression was stuffed to the brim with concentration.
He put the bag back in his pocket.
"I suppose that copious amounts of neurocain could eventually lead to hallucinations." Junji noted.
"I'm, uh, glad you recognize that."
Tex's words left his mouth alongside his exhale of relief. But after shooting another glance at Junji's face, his anxiety threatened to flare up once again.
"I can handle the withdrawal symptoms." Junji said in a somber tone. "But I have a greater worry."
"What?"
"How I will cope with the memories. I've never been so elated before, and I fear the rest of my life will feel bleak by comparison."
Tex tried to think of a reply, but he didn't have any way to relate to the situation.
"Wait here." Junji ordered.
Junji bolted back up the stairs in the direction of the office. A good five minutes later, he reappeared with a blank expression and an upside-down note safety pinned to his shirt.
Tex wasn't sure what he'd been doing, as only Barton was still in the office.
"Oh, hello." Junji greeted as a smile broke across his face.
"...What did you do?" asked Tex.
Confusion covered Junji's expression as he gave Tex a glance up and down. His focus, however, shifted when he noticed the note on his shirt.
Junji grabbed the bottom of the note and tilted it upwards so he could read it.
"I, Junji Tagawa, am writing this letter to myself to inform myself that I've had Barton wipe the last four days of my memory in an attempt to soften the blow of cocaine withdrawals." Junji cited. "I’ve also written a log of everything I've done over the past few days that you need to know, which you can find inside your vaginal cavity, below the miniature poison dagger and above the Lord of the Rings extended edition DVD box set."
"...What?"
Junji's smile broke into a laugh.
"I'm kidding!" he said. "The box set was a joke. It's really an ounce-sized emergency smoke grenade."
They ended up walking back to the apartment complex together. Thanks to Tex's inability to recall his promise to Tala, he found himself discussing whether Chairman Mao or Troskey would win in a fist fight with Junji until they'd gotten to the staircase.
It wasn't until Tex was getting ready for bed that he remembered he was supposed to investigate.
He decided to check in on Junji the next afternoon. Junji was probably starting to feel the withdrawal effects, so Tex figured it would have been good for him to swing by anyway.
Tex sent Junji a text he was coming and managed to wait five minutes for an answer before he decided to just come down and knock on Junji's door.
Junji answered the door with two heavy eyes and a cup of applesauce.
"Howdy." Tex greeted.
"Hello." Junji replied. "What are you doing here?"
Tex had never heard Junji speak so slowly.
"You doing alright?" answered Tex. "I wanted to make sure you were doing alright after the whole--cocaine thing."
"Oh, thank you. Truthfully, I am a bit winded."
Junji stepped aside, allowing Tex access into his room.
His room was messier than Tex had last seen it. Still not anywhere near as cluttered as a normal person's place of living, but it was an alarming sight nonetheless.
Junji took a seat on his couch and peeled back the foil on the applesauce cup with a trembling hand.
"You, uh," Tex stammered, "you been busy?"
"I have taken on a great deal of responsibility."
"...Need any help?"
Junji stuck his tongue into the applesauce before answering.
"Do you mean that?" he asked. "I could use some labor."
"Sure. Got nothing going on."
"Very well. Would you mind sitting down at my desk?"
Junji's desk was about six feet away from his couch, both of them facing the shaded window. Tex plopped his bag down on the floor between them and took a seat in the chair in front of Junji's computer.
He wiggled the mouse to reveal a fresh Google Chrome tab.
Tex switched the language from Japanese to English so he could know what was going on. When Junji failed to get the applesauce at the bottom of his cup with his tongue, he tilted his head up and tapped on the plastic back.
"I've done most of the work already, and now I just need to increase my net worth by one percent." Junji explained.
"Alright."
"Click on the first bookmarked site. It will take you to my trading home page."
Tex followed the instructions and clicked the icon. As someone who had stolen several thousand dollars worth of nickels and ballpoint pens in his life, Tex had good faith in his ability to manage risk.
His mouth came open with a tiny pop when the page loaded in.
"Whoa!" Tex shouted.
"What?"
"You're worth--seventeen quadrillion dollars?"
"Yes, and I need you to put ten percent in Ethereum. It's a crypto currency I've been watching for months."
Tex's wrists began to shake as he considered his task. Junji was either going to make or lose at least trillions more than Tex had ever even had his hands on.
"Did you put it in Ethereum?" asked Junji.
"No I panicked and put all your money into limited edition Chuck E. Cheese tokens with JFK Junior's face on them!"
It took Junji a few long seconds to reply. Tex counted six of his own frantic inhales.
"How's the market?" Junji wondered.
"Oh, god, it's plummeting."
"Then I suggest you take it out."
With a whimper, Tex converted all of Junji's money back to USD before throwing a hand over his eyes. He looked back at the screen through his fingers to assess the damage.
"You...what the hell?" Tex managed.
"What?" Junji replied.
"You--reached your goal of a one percent increase."
"Very good. We are done, in that case."
"You even went a little over. How's that possible if the JFK coins went down?"
"It seems the dollar went down faster."
It took about ten minutes for Tex's heart to resume pumping blood at its standard pace. By that time, Junji had gone through seven cups of applesauce.
"Sorry I got so nervous back there." said Tex.
"I understand. It was a heavy task to ask of you."
"Yeah, can't say I've dealt with so much money before."
Junji let out a weak chuckle. Tex did his best to push his temper down when he was struck with a sudden memory.
"Lida sure as hell didn't let me get anywhere close when we were married." he followed. "You know, she talked and talked about how I needed to get paid more, but she'd never let me handle fifteen cents in a million years."
"Do you always steer conversations so you can speak poorly of your ex-wife after you end things with her?"
Junji's expression stayed empty as Tex managed to collect himself.
"I don't..." he trailed off. "Look, can't I be happy that I'm not in that--relationship anymore?"
"Why are you so angry with her?"
Tex surprised himself when he was hit with a sudden wave of exhaustion that refused to be ignored.
With a wince, he began to rub his temples.
"I don't know." Tex admitted.
There was a shuffling behind him. Tex looked over his shoulder to see that Junji had grabbed his bag and fished out Tala's things.
"Would you like to find out?" Junji asked as he held out the adapter.
Since there were only two of them, Tex ended up having to stick both the green cord and one of the blue cords to his forehead. After the both of them had entered the train car without incidence, Tex put his hand on the window alongside Junji's.
The window popped to life with the first person perspective through Tex's own eyes. But because Tex was staring at the screen, it only showed a slightly smaller version of the screen, which showed a slightly smaller version of the screen, which showed a slightly smaller version of the--
Tex turned his eyes to the floor to end the madness.
"I have opened the executive function roadmap." said Junji.
Tex looked back at the window to see a map of interlocking lines. It looked similar to the one that had shown up for Barton, and Tex didn’t see anything special about it.
"What do we do now?" he asked.
"I'm not sure. Why don't you try, thinking of Lida as a concept?"
Tex gnawed at the inside of his cheek while he followed Junji's advice. When the anger hit him, the map began to zoom in on itself until it had reached a patch of triangles.
(larger version)
Tex couldn't believe what he was looking at.
"Are you aware that this is absolute nonsense?" Junji asked.
"I'm aware that it's--something."
"I don't understand your strange obsession with fault."
"What'd you mean?"
There was a minor lull in the conversation when Junji took a few seconds to answer.
"She clearly has emotional issues, and you clearly have emotional issues. When these issues come together, they can't help but to create something unstable." Junji explained. "Who do you expect me to blame for that, God? The tissue that makes up your brain?"
"What--issues?"
"I don't know. I've not taken the time to methodically search through every second of your childhoods."
Tex ran his tongue over the tiny bite marks in his cheek. Junji was making perfect sense, and there was only one nitpick that Tex managed to think of.
"What about when she stabbed me in the kidney?" asked Tex.
Junji's mouth twisted to the side.
"I suppose that is morally unjustifiable." he replied.
With a tiny sigh, Tex shook his head.
"Look, I get your point." he said. "I should--"
Tex cut himself off when the road map began to shift again.
(larger version)
The sudden wave of relief that Tex felt was overwhelming.
He couldn't believe he'd had such a terrible argument inside him the whole time. He wondered for a moment how it had managed to develop in him, although he suspected it was most likely from an old mixture of adolescent confusion and specific cases.
"Damn." Tex said as he popped the suction cup off his head.
Junji removed his own cup and joined Tex back in reality.
"I am pleased I could help you." he replied.
After putting the adapter back with the rest of Tala's things, Junji plopped back down on his couch. Tex returned to his spot in Junji's computer chair, as Junji was too slumped over to allow for much room.
"What do you reckon I do?" asked Tex.
Junji hummed in consideration.
"I think that you should communicate to her what you've learned today, without placing or accepting blame." he answered.
"She's gonna be real mad it took me so long."
"Then I think you two should spend time apart, until you've both managed to not hate each other."
"...Alright."
"And then I think, once or twice a year, you should meet up to have sex."
Tex barked out a laugh of amazement. But to his surprise, he found himself rolling Junji's suggestion over in his mind.
He doubted Lida would go for it.
"Lastly," Junji continued, "I feel the need to mention that if you were ever to record these encounters--"
"No." Tex replied.
"I'd like you to know that I would be interested--"
"Nope."
"I would consider paying some amount of money to--"
"No."
Junji let out a lazy chuckle.
"So be it." he replied. "If you need me, I'll be in my office."
As he spoke, Junji curled up into a ball and shoved his face into an adorable Pikachu plushie.
“Just wondering.” said Tex. “Do you got any idea why I might not be alright with you seeing something like that?”
“I do not.”
When Junji's breathing started to slow in seconds, Tex began to wonder if he'd fallen asleep or simply blacked out.
Tex turned back to the computer screen. He let out an amused hum and gave Junji's obscene net worth one more glance before he closed the Chrome browser he was in.
Under the browser was a Word document.
Tex knew he should turn his eyes away. And he most definitely would have, had he not seen his own name.
He wasn't sure he was doing the right thing, but he was suddenly too curious to care. So after shooting Junji's curled up form on the couch a look to make sure he was still out cold, Tex turned to the screen and began to read.
Tex minimized the page and reached into his pocket for his emergency joint.
The rush of dread that hit him was hard to deal with. But he felt no anger at Junji, for the same reason he would feel no anger at a stray cat who ate his pet fish.
He was, however, angry with himself. He could remember many times when he'd helped Junji with various schemes, but very few times when he'd asked any questions. He'd been the one to kill Max Wells. He'd been the one to drive Junji to his business plans. He'd been the one who'd bought seventeen quadrillion dollars of limited edition Chuck E. Cheese coins with JFK Junior's face on them.
He knew he had to do something. Considering Junji's radical competency, he surely would have a frighteningly high probability of success with his plans if unchallenged.
Tex stepped away from the computer and walked out of Junji's apartment in a haze. He found himself going over everything he had at his disposal as he made his way back to his own place. He considered trying to reason with Junji, although it seemed like much too late in the game. He was also certain that Junji could easily outmatch him physically. Tex supposed he could kill Junji in his sleep, although the idea was so horrid that Tex pushed it down for an absolute final option.
His eyes widened when he realized exactly what he needed to do.
Tex reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. After doing a quick search on Google Maps for Doctor Lofgren, he found her building in a familiar area of Sweden.
He also found her number, which he gave a call the moment he'd gotten to his couch.
The phone rang twice. The first thing he heard on the other end was the sound of Roffe barking his head off.
"Det här är Lofgren, vem är det?" greeted Dr. Lofgren's familiar voice.
"Hi." Tex greeted. "It's, uh, Dallas. We met a few weeks ago?"
Dr. Lofgren's reply was so energetic that Tex had to hold the phone away from his ear for a few seconds.
"...so happy to hear from you! Have you been well?"
"Been alright."
Tex wasn't surprised when Dr. Lofgren launched into several tales, and he did his best to drop several timely 'uh-huh's.
“...then Hitler, who I’ve put inside Winston Churchill’s body, turns to Cleopatra who I’ve put in Frank Sinatra’s body and says--”
"That's...uh..." Tex cut in. "I was wondering if you could do me a favor."
"I would love to do you favor! What favor?"
"Is there a chance you could send me one of them--simulations?"
A few seconds of silence passed. Tex found himself wondering how Roffe was doing.
"I could send you mp5 file. Did you have a particular simulation in mind?"
Tex rubbed his forehead with the sudden wish that he'd thought a little longer about how to describe what he was asking for before calling.
"Kinda hard to explain.” he answered. “Junji's, uh, plotting something. I was hoping you could give me a--reality of where he goes through with his plans."
"How would I make sure he goes through with plans?"
"Take me out, I guess. Tell the machine I--went on a mercenary trip or something."
Another chunk of silence passed, although Tex could faintly hear Dr. Lofgren say something in Swedish.
"Roffe is viewing the simulation you requested at fifty times speed.” she said to Tex after a minute. “He will tell me when there's something of inter--oh, he is calling me over now."
Tex focused his ears to hear Roffe barking once again.
"I'll be back in a moment."
Dr. Lofgren was gone for a good ten minutes. Tex passed the time by playing an anxious round of minesweeper.
"Oh, I see the plan you were speaking of." Dr. Lofgren finally said, with less energy than Tex had ever heard her say anything.
"...Guessing it ain't pretty?"
"It is so sad. But I understand why I must send it to you."
Tex took his phone away from his ear when the text notification played.
From +46 630-231-39
:'(.mp5
Dr. Lofgren ended the call about a minute later, after making Tex promise to give her an update sometime in the days that followed.
Tex emailed himself the download link that Dr. Lofgren had sent him so he could view it on his computer. After he sat down in his chair and started up the video from his email, he began the process of learning about the future he knew he needed to prevent.
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