The Kyubeygoop™ cleared out soon after the battle, seemingly evaporating into the air. Most all the guests fled the battle after Kyoko became a witch, not because they weren’t capable fighters but to prevent this story from becoming essentially Super Smash Sisters: Magical Anime Boogaloo. Sayaka came back after a while, though Kyosuke was nowhere to be found. This was concerning.

Madoka and Kyoko stood next to the decabear of honey, hand in hand. Madoka picked up the red ribbons from the ground and put them back in her hair. They were a present from her mother, and she would never give them up for good. Nope. Never.

“Where did you get such a big jar of honey, anyway?” Madoka asked.

“Long story.” Kyoko said. “Looooooong story. Nah just kidding I bought it from Don Patch.”

“You mean from Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo?”

“Yeah.”

“Wow!” Madoka was in awe that she knew such a celebrity. Kyoko wore a smile that was extra-proud. “Wait a minute, weren’t you--”

“Subject change.” Kyoko pointed at the judge, who was for some reason walking up the stairs to the stage. He came up to them and stood. A silent moment passed before Kyoko spoke up. “Sir?”

“I was hired to administer a wedding,” the judge boomed. “Is this still a truth?” Madoka and Kyoko turned their heads toward each other.

“Do you?” They asked each other simultaneously. They giggled and performed the incontrovertible headbutt of love.

“I do,” they said together.

“...That was fast,” the judge said. Wait, said? Wow. “Have a nice life, then.” And that was the last they ever saw of him.

“It feels nice being Madoka Sakura, huh?” Kyoko asked.

“Uhh… No, we are totally the Kanames.”

“What? No, my name is way more badass!”

“But… If I’m a Sakura then… I don’t want to be a Naruto character, Kyoko…”

Kyoko groaned. “Ugh, fine. I’ll be Kyoko Kaname then. It’s a cool alliteration anyway.”

Madoka waltzed over to the wrecked pile of wedding presents and picked one up. It was still in good condition, luckily. She handed the present to Kyoko, who looked very confused.

“This is for you,” she said. “I was going to give you a present for being such a good friend all these years, but I guess now it’s a wedding present too.” Kyoko opened it to reveal… a large red sombrero-- the most kickin’ present of all time-- and immediately put it on. Best day ever.

Suddenly, Sayaka ran up to the base of the stage with a huge camera on a tripod. “Guys I’m still Maid of Honor right??”

“Yes, Sayaka,” Madoka laughed.

“Then I’m gonna take the best photographs and Maid of Honor can ever take ever. Now pose!” They posed. “Say cheese~” Sayaka pressed the button and ran into the picture, just in time to make it into the background.

“Wow,” Kyoko exclaimed. “It’s beautiful. This will be the best marriage ever.”

“Yep. And as Sheriff Kaname and her new Deputy Kaname, we will keep Mexico safe from crime forever!” They high-fived. It was awesome.

The end. See the further Adventures of the Kanames in CARRIBBEAN RIM, coming…. After I see the third Madoka movie sometime.