《Trash Knight: System Recycler: A litRPG Satire that No One Asked For》69: Real Heroes Never Get Ambushed
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"How about Recycle Crew?" I said.
Vil shook his head from the driver's seat. We hit a bump, and the adventurers riding on the roof grunted. "Sounds terrible, Redrim."
"Guild Garbage?"
"No."
"Garbage Guild."
"That's the same thing, but in reverse," Vil said.
"I give up," I said.
"Good."
The silence in the tank returned, and there was naught but the hum of the engine. The adventurers rode above us, their conversations sporadic at first, happy and filled with life, but as the evening came to a close, they grew tired.
I had expected them to just follow us on horseback, but the temple had already stolen their horses and sold them off. Not only that, but those conniving little shithead priests even blackmailed them into giving the temple most of their loot. I had a mind to barge into the temple and recycle the flesh of everyone inside, but I knew that it would be unbecoming of an honorable Trash Knight.
Outside, the sun hung low on the horizon, and through the open driver's hatch, I could see the dull blue light of sunset around.
We hit another bump. The adventurers grunted above.
"Redrim," Vil said. "We should make camp soon."
"Why?" I asked. "We're only a few hours away."
"And a day too early," he said back. "We have time. We should rest well for once."
I considered it. Vil still hadn't gotten a good night's sleep since we had been running wild for days now. Besides that, I knew the adventurers above were getting tired from all the bumps, not to mention exhausted from the dragon raid, and I didn't want them rolling off the tank at this speed.
"Go ahead," I told him. "Find a good place for us to camp."
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We rode for a little while longer, the sky got darker, and just before we were unable to see much in front of us, Vil pulled off the dirt road and into a wide grassy area.
I stuck my head out of the hatch to take a look around.
The dirt road sat on our left, and on the other side of it, a forest that thickened further in. On our side of the road was a wide patch of green fields with overgrown grass. On the far end, the forest spilled across the road, and the treeline was maybe 300 meters ahead of us.
"Ah, Sir Redrim," said the knight from atop the tank. "Pray tell will we be sleeping here tonight? We could indeed use a rest after today's battle."
"Verily," I said.
I shot a manipulator arm into a nearby socket to tether with the tank, and mentally I brought up the work order to make tents and food for everyone.
Vil squeezed past me to leave. "We need a night watch," he said. "We can divide our sleeping hours and work in shifts."
"I'll be the watch," I said. "I don't sleep."
Vil opened his mouth to speak, but we were interrupted by a deafening THOONNG!
It rattled the entirety of the tank and slammed me against the back wall. The echo faded, then silence.
No one spoke. The world was quiet.
Then, a distant puff of an explosion, and--
THOONNG!
I winced, opened my eyes, and spotted a large, gaping, perfectly circular hole in the front right of the tank. Was that always there? From the hole, I could see all the way down to the treeline, and there, hidden beneath the darkness of a tree, was a familiar shape.
A distant flash and a thump.
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It was a tank!
An explosion slammed into us. The flames poured into the tank, dust plumed around, then the light of it expired.
Vil gathered himself in the smoking tank and tried to dig his way to the driver's seat. It was missing. The entire front of the tank had been shredded.
Outside, screaming. The adventurers were yelling about something, but I didn't hear. My mind had gone into full battle mode, and I had just loaded a Default-HEAT shell.
Vil squeezed by me to climb out of the hatch. "Retreat and regroup, Redrim."
"No," I said back.
He scoffed and jumped out of the tank.
I looked down the scope to aim. The treeline was too dark. I couldn't see shit.
"He's right," said Jessie. She was still cuffed, sitting by my legs. "At this point, you should escape."
"Shut up." I took aim.
Flashes in the distance. Several! It was more than one tank! Just as I pulled the trigger, we rocked with piercing tank fire. Their AP shells ripped right through the armor, punching holes through us like butter.
Bullshit.
My shot was off target. I tried to load a new round.
My left arm was missing.
"There's no point," Jessie said. "They got the jump on you. It was just bad luck."
"Bullshit!" I snapped back.
My tentacle arms shot out and loaded a new round. HEAT again.
A shell slammed against the turret. The clanging echo pulsed through me.
I aimed.
Click. No effect.
They got the main turret! Fuck!
Jessie snapped off her handcuffs and started to climb around me. "Die if you want," she said. "I wanna keep this body intact for a while."
I boiled over with rage. Through the shredded armor, I could see in the distance those enemy tanks. With each flash of gunfire, with each instant of light revealing their shapes, I could see that they were different. Sleeker. Bigger.
"Fine! Damnit!"
I reached in the crafting drawer, and took all 10 smoke grenades, then lobbed them around. They blanketed the area in thick smoke.
Another tank round ricocheted off the side. One punched through the front and out of the floor. A third thumped in the dirt nearby.
Molt.
I threw the tank in reverse as it shed its outer layer, then I turned and floored it. The engine coughed and sputtered, practically limping across the now-smoke-covered street, and I made it across, now weaving through the trees as I raced into the thick of the forest.
Once I found a spot covered with underbrush, I killed the engine and hopped out. Vil had caught up to me, and with some quick thinking, he cast a few earth spells to cover the tank with moss and ivy.
Back toward the road, the others hurried over. They were struggling to carry someone--the knight. He grunted in agony. His leg was missing, and blood poured from the wound.
Vil went over to help heal. They paused as they stopped the knight's bleeding, the healer put him to sleep, and they carried the wounded hero up to me.
"Redrim," Vil said. "Leave the tank here. You can make a new one if they find it."
I said nothing. I still simmered in anger. When they hurried past me, I followed.
The enemy's engines were roaring down the road now. They may come looking. They may not.
But through the thickness of the trees, I saw it as it blinked past.
A massive, colossal tank. Two or three times the size of my own.
It was a raid boss tank.
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The Law of Averages
What young boy doesn’t crave adventure? What young man doesn’t wish to be a superhero?But time marches on, and life grows dull with responsibility. Is it any wonder that old dreams are forgotten?Welcome to The Law of Averages: In which a man is dragged solidly out of his comfort zone. Be careful what you wish for, you never know when it will come true.This story follows Daniel Newman as he adjusts to a strange new world. One where superpowers are for sale, where heroics are frowned upon, and where life is constantly defying Daniel’s expectations. Dan always thought that he was destined to be normal, but one world’s normal is another world’s special.
8 277Contact First
2039 - Earth A narrow beam energy signal appeared aimed squarely at earth from the TRAPPIST system. The communication consisted of a layered set of repeating data over several thousand wavelengths. Over the next few months scientists discovered that the lower wavelengths carried an encoded numerical language which could then be used to interpret the more complicated messages carried on the higher wavelengths. After half a year of painstaking work the signal was fully decoded. It described a small satellite launched along a precise trajectory towards the fourth planet of our solar system. Included was a package of advanced research that humanity would need to have ready in order to receive the satellite and decelerate it safely. The alien data provided the kick that humanity needed to turn from petty squabbling and unite to explore the final frontier. Major government and corporate leaders worked together to create the framework for the United Federation of Sol. UFS spaceports went from scaffolding to daily launches in every major city around the globe. Ships floated like dandelion seeds, spreading on solar wind to grow into colonies. 2397 - Mars orbit, Egeria Station The command center was a hive of activity as checks were conducted and systems initialized. Scientists flitted by like mayflies as communicators beeped and holoscreens spat out green tinted readouts. Nervous energy was thick in the air as everyone anticipated the culmination of over three hundred years of work. Massive fusion reactors under the planet's surface thrummed with barely restrained power as energy fed into a gleaming metallic maze criss crossing the planet. Metal fingers reached up, overshadowing the mighty olympus mons and trying to grab the stars. All over the solar system, people quickly turned to look as gigantic energy lances shot from the dusty fourth planet. Two years later. The same people that clapped loudly at the successful activation of project Hermes now wait with baited breath. A silver capsule trailing bright photonic sails is captured by a net of grav beams and guided with care bordering on reverence into the station. Holoscreens across the headquarters project an image of the sleek craft settling in the bay. Data connections are established and the holoscreens blink to white. Slowly an image forms on the screen. Across the headquarters people stare in wonder as a wholly alien face stares back. "Contact established. Welcome to the universe."
8 155Kingdom
For what is worth, for all the power, the pride, the glory, it holds nothing against the flow of time. Fighting the cycle the laws itself govern and chaos will always be at the forefront. Fate itself will shatter, Time will be cut and Causality will be undetermined. And at the end of it all, the victor will always claim history.
8 177The wisher
In a black world, that gives a feeling of emptiness, stood a man. After killing the final boss in the game. The world around him went black, and a girl came out of nowhere.she was like an angel. White-eyes, hair, and skin.She looked at the man with eyes devoted of feelings and asked him ""what's your wish?"".the man lowered his head and began to think.Thinking about his life, about how his parents died in the war and he never felt their love, how he was an outcast that no one wanted to get close to, throughout his life, he felt lonely.The only exception to his loneliness was his friend. he never met her in person. she was lively. he liked her if he was more honest with himself, he loved her. He already knew what he wanted as a wish, But she will hate him for that, he was sure of it.He looked up, straight at the eyes of the girl and said ""any wish?"".She answered with a nod.After a moment of silence, the man said with a hint of anticipation “then... Make this world and the real world into one. I want this kind of life to become reality. Give me a chance to live in the real world.""
8 168IMAGINES ❤️
Random imagines about you and Kendall Jenner. Feel free to request some stories. Thank you guys! GXG only. G!F but no smut. 😂 I don't know how to write it. Just kidding! There's SMUT inside. 👌🏼
8 192A Secret Service [NOW PUBLISHED]
Now available in paperback!"I LOVE IT!" - CarniaHolmes "I'm going to break your nose, because I don't like your face," Carter said. She pointed to Zac. "I'm going to dislocate your other shoulder, just to make them even." She cocked her head and gave the main guy a sickly sweet smile."I'm going to break your wrist, taking away your baseball career. And finally you, Finch," she said, looking to the last guy. "I'm going to bust your ankle because I don't like the way you walk." She slid her hands into her pockets. "Now, how does that sound to all of you? And please feel free to look amused, skeptical or patronizing at this point. I'll have all the more fun wiping the expressions off your faces." Carter Owens, daughter of a Secret Service agent, is trained to disassemble any weapon, any situation, and anyone. Her biting sarcasm and razor-sharp mind make her impossible to beat in a word fight and when talking doesn't work, she uses her fists. She attends Hamilton Prep, Washington D.C.'s most prestigious high school, where everyone is related to someone in power, except her. When Hamilton Prep receives a flood of new students, Carter's role as social outcast changes when she makes two unexpected friends. Friends who are hiding a secret. As Carter uncovers the truth, she confronts challenges she is unequipped to handle and finds herself in a dangerous situation. For a girl trained to see everything, Carter never saw this coming."This is one of those books that seem like it won't be really good, but then it's mindblowing-ly amazing and then you're questioning life =)" - rwrites07"#rr for like the 10th time haha love this book" - tahls16 "I loved this book, it wasn't cringey cliche or stupid. I normally hate third person books but I loved this and all the characters, especially carter." - lenathedov Editor's Choice Talk of The Town#1 Teen Fiction, #1 Fiction #1 Love#1 Completed#1 New Adult#1 Friendship#1 Funny#1 Drama
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