Back to Haru's POV

“I’m sorry you had to see that Samada” I pat him on the back.

“It its fine its better I know instead of always wondering if I missed them or could have... could have saved them.” He seems to struggle with it for a second still shaken from what we saw.

“If you want, I can start giving some sort lessons once things cool down a bit. Saeko was the kendo club captain and I trained with her… Maybe you can help another family someday.” His fist tightens.

“Yeah… I’d like that. Now if you don’t mind, I’d rather be alone.” Did I say something wrong? Shit. Oh well he sounds like he wants to improve himself.

“Alright let me know if you need anything.” I shuffle in between seats to sit up next to Rei and Takashi.

“Thanks anyways…” I hear from behind me. Okay good I didn’t fuck up.

“So, lets stop by the pharmacy again stock up anything we can get our hands on now that we are heading back.”

We pull up and are greeted to the sight of Taniuchi with the police officer. Feet dangling from the top of the building talking. That’s a good sign hopefully they interacted a bit and shes feeling a bit better. They see us and come down to meet us. They have most of the medical supplies in a few bags we left behind.

“Hey! So, no pressure but come to any decisions yet? You’re welcome to come find us if you need more time.”

She cringes a little at first looking down at me but after a few short breaths she speaks finally.

“Hello, my name is Hideki. Thank you for finding me hiding out in a basement. I hope you will all let me in even if I’m still having some…issues around me.” She looks down at the ground. Ah I see she doesn’t want to share what happened. I don’t really mind either way what her life was like I’ll make sure to ask later if shes in any way related to my mom though just in case.

“Nice to meet you Hideki, were you a police officer girl or was that some other girl that we ran into?” She looks at me a little surprised until she sees my smirk and understands I’m playing along.

“That girls long gone. I uh I’m a music composer I guess?” I don’t get it, but I think that was a joke considering Taniuchi lets out a small giggle beside her.

“Alright then, we could use some help loading up the rest of the meds that can fit in the car. Are you okay with sharing a car or would you prefer we send some girls later to come get you?” Gotta be respectful just in case.

She grits her teeth a bit before deciding. “No, I need to learn to deal with it… You guys saved me if I don’t deal with it now I may never fully get over it…”

Makes sense I heard some forms of ptsd treatment involve going back into a car and experiencing something similar but without what happened to cause the damage. Then again theres all sorts of studies that both agree and disagree with that. If she feels like interacting with us will help, who am I to deny it.

“Alright! Just let Taniuchi know if you need anything. I’ll trust her to help you or come get me or Saeko if the problem needs it fixing.”

She smiles a bit more but still not meeting my eyes. “Thanks…” As she grabs some of their stuff and moves it to the truck.

We pack up everything we could before returning. I had the guys stick to one side and let Hideki sit wherever she wanted first to give her space. She flinched a few times but overall looked determined. Me, Takashi and Samada are in the back while shes up front with Shizuka with Taniuchi with Rei are between us still looking over Takashi as hes still not in the greatest condition.

We arrive back at the base and start unloading with the help of the other people. When we walk up stairs theres Alice singing a weird song about bang bang bang your guns as a weird version of row your boat. But about killing people instead. This has Hirano written all over it.

“Hirano your teaching Alice weird things, aren’t you?” I call out walking up the stairs to see Saya kicking him a couple of times.

“I TOLD YOU TO NOT RUIN THAT SWEET INNOCENT CHILD!” Yara keeps kicking him.

“Hey hey it was just a song not like its anything bad…besides, she thought it was fun.” Hirano looks around awkwardly. Alice not having any sort of reaction to him getting in trouble and just goes back to singing the song. With a slight smile at watching Hirano being hit. -sigh- Saeko might be rubbing off on her as well.

Saya cringes hearing it again. “JUST DON’T DO ANY MORE. Shes just a little girl, the world is falling down around her she doesn’t need anything weird being told to her.” Kicking his butt one last time she harrumphs and turns to me. “-sigh- Welcome back, how did things go? Looking at them looks like you had a bit of a rough time.” looking behind me and seeing Hideki and Takashi being half carried inside.

“Oh! We found a new survivor in the basement of one of the buildings.” I lie but I’ll inform her on the details later in private later.

“That’s awfully nice of you guys and how did the pharmacy run go and Samadas place?” that’s a bit of a sour note.

“Um the pharmacy had a lot of stuff I had to kill another survivor though. He pulled a gun on Takashi and shot him in the thigh after holding Rei hostage… we did get a large supply of drugs though. We also didn’t have much luck at Samadas we found what was left of his family… but…” I pull her closer so only she hears me. “There wasn’t much. His mother and sister were turned, and his dad killed himself.” She looks a little guilty about asking.

“It’s okay you didn’t know. Next time we just need to be even more careful alright? Besides that, dumbass rushed a guy with a gun with a makeshift spear. I was sneaking up behind the guy, so he didn’t need to act out.” I look over at Takashi who Rei is helping up the steps. He looks like he wants to say something in response to it but gives up with a sigh.

“Shut up already Haru, he already feels terrible you don’t need to keep rubbing it in. Besides how would he know you were coming to help? All he knew was I was in trouble.” Rei glares at me.

“I’ll keep rubbing it in because he was being an idiot. Just because he has a shotgun doesn’t mean he is immortal. He needs to start thinking before he acts. If he did maybe, we wouldn’t have lost some of our friends at the school.” I turn away and start to walk away. I hear something fall to the floor and the sound of footsteps I turn in time to see her reach out to smack me. I stare her dead in the eye as I let her.

SMACK

“HOW DARE YOU!” then the pain in her hand sets in. I may only be 20% harder to hurt but that’s enough that a slap like that would hurt her more than me. A small smile dancing at my lips as I watch her wince in pain.

“OW fuck, but how dare you place that blame on him! None of us knew what was happening none of us knew how to handle it. Mistakes were made but we are trying here!” Shes crying but shes still being an idiot.

“Yes, so fucking learn from those mistakes. Don’t charge in and expect everything to magically work out. Go into every scenario and consider the downsides of your actions. If I wasn’t there, he would be dead and you would be chained up in the backroom. So, no I won’t stop ribbing him for it because you two obviously wont listen. You are still reckless you are still letting stuff get past you. Learn from the mistakes you made don’t keep fucking making them.” I know I shouldn’t be yelling but god damn is it frustrating seeing the same old excuses over and over again. She looks shocked at me so does Saya I don’t think I’ve ever really blown up like this in front of either of them.

“Now leave me the fuck alone and deal with your childhood crush. He may be a dumbass reckless kid but hes still in the group and I won’t let him die like an idiot because he decided to charge a guy with a gun with a stick with a knife taped to it. Not everyone can sprint faster then a bullet.”

I walk away letting her process that a bit. I see Takashi glaring at me but averting his gaze as I walk past him to the room, I was sharing with Saeko.

“Hey Haru… are you okay?” she reaches out and holds my shoulders. Her being here calmed me down a little. It’s weird It’s like I’ve been extra emotional since yesterday. It feels like theres this something inside me churning around.

“I don’t know Saeko…. I don’t know.” It doesn’t feel right I wish I could describe it to her.

“Wanna talk about it?” she saddles up next to me and leans my head down to her lap.

“I don’t know… It’s like I want to but I can’t put it into words.” I also just don’t want you to look at me differently, I guess. I’m always the calm one that helps. Seeing me burst like this… It feels like its not me anymore.

“It’s okay Haru, they will understand. Everything is going to be okay.” She strokes my hair a bit.

I tell her what happened in the day. What really happened. Her hand freezes on my head for a bit then continues as I tell her the story. In the car on the way to Samadas I also learned that the reason that Rei was grabbed to begin with was Rei hesitated to kill him when he grappled for her. They didn’t even see the gun until he was already holding her.

“We need to prepare the others for fights like this. They are hesitant to take a life which will just kill them one of these days. I’m not saying they should always kill first but they need to be willing if the need arises. I don’t know. It might be safer though if we just killed people when we see them? But then I need to save people and we probably should save more people…” -sigh- she continues to stroke my head some slight worry in her face.

“Let’s make sure that everyone is okay though alright? We can’t show too much weakness everyones so lost out there they are grasping for anything to help keep them afloat. They believe in you, you havnt failed them yet.” She smiles down at me.

“I know that’s why its so hard, its this pressure that if I fail this tower of cards will crumble.” It just feels so delicate. People are so fickle and scared. I know its not their fault but it’s still frustrating. Heck it’s still the first day after this all started and I’m not a leader. I’m not a people person I’m just the one that’s been thrust into this position since I’m the one that’s studied, and I’m much older mentally. -sigh- I just wish the other adults here took a bit more of a stance with things and not be creepy like that weasel was.

“Alright alright I can’t just lay here all day we still need to check in on Kawamoto’s family today.” I get up and start to make my way out.

“Thank you Saeko I’m glad you’re here with me.” Giving a light kiss on the forehead.

“You were there with me in my darkest moment I’ll be here for you in yours and for all the future ones we share together.” She pulls me closer and gives a normal kiss.

“Thanks… It really means a lot to hear that.” We make our way out. A few people give me looks but mostly its respect. Takashi gives me a glare but seems to not be willing to voice anything yet, Rei looks like she is deep in thought and is avoiding looking at me.

“Alright Kawamoto lets go look for your family.” I call out.