《Jack and Jill Conquer the Shattered World》85: Making Friends in High and Low Places

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“So, you never did go into detail about how your date with Kalpana went,” said Jack.

I rolled my eyes.

“Oh, I didn’t? We picked out a mountain. Then we popped over to one of the heavenly realms ‘many’ love-hotels to bang for a couple hours, before heading back home,” I said. My tone was flat and sarcastic. She’d been bothering me about this for a week now and she already knew all the details of everything that happened during me and Kalpana’s date.

I’d have been more understanding if I thought it came from a place of insecurity, or concern, but I knew my wife well enough to know she was just teasing me. It also didn’t help that she’d spent the last couple days humming “Jilbert and Kal sitting in a tree…” over and over...and over again.

“Oh, really?!~ Great! Did you do that trick where you multiply yourself? I’ve heard that the Harvesters are really big on group play...” said Jack. Smiling broadly, eyes shining with a very unwholesome child-like joy.

“Ugh! No! No, that’s not what happened….You deviant. We had a normal first date. It was awkward at first, then we just sort of got to chatting, and eased up on ourselves, and things were alright,” I said. Rolling my eyes, as I gave Jack the actual answer to her question.

“Boo...Come on, man. Put some grease in that fire! I already got Kal all ready for you. You just need to seal the deal and bring us home a wife,” said Jack.

“Well, it’ll take a while, so please ease up about it. Also, why do you sound like a late 1990s sleazeball, of the sort you’d find hanging out at the back of a bowling alley?... Or like in an old vintage porno?” I said.

“I...uh….I might have watched a few old-world films from Kian’s surprisingly robust film collection, that had a small, but definitely negative, influence on me….I’ll try to chill,” said Jack. Blushing a little.

“Thank you. That’s all I ask,” I said. Putting my arm around Jack and pulling her in for a hug and a peck on her forehead.

“Ugh, you know the rules. No squishy stuff right before big meetings! If you make me all warm and gooey inside, it gets hard to be all cold, boss-bitch, when I need to be,” said Jack.

“Fine, fine...I’ll save the squishy stuff for after, then,” I said. Still taking the opportunity to blow a light, warm, breath over one of Jack’s pointed ears.

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“Dude, what’d I just say?” said Jack. Making a cute noise that was somewhere between a laugh and a snarl, and lightly pushing me away.

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Two figures stepped inside one of the heavenly realm's most famous eateries and drinking houses, and the whole establishment seemed to fall silent. There was an air of danger about the two that made the faint-hearted, and less powerful, quickly find reasons to wrap up any business they had in the restaurant. The figure in lead was a pale beauty, a tall queenly woman, with snow-white hair, pale coffee-colored skin, cat-like eyes, and a prominent set of jet-black goat's horns and spaded tails. She drew the shadows so thoroughly that the space around her grew lighter as a result. Creating a kind of ambient spot-like effect on her.

Behind the woman was a man, a tall man. Big and broad. Dark and handsome. With black-holes for eyes. His looks so fetching he could make even the legendarily beautiful fae feel envy. The man was strangely lacking in atmosphere. His presence was faint to a point that almost made it hard to notice him. However, when one noticed him, you really noticed him. It was like being oblivious of the planet you were on, and the universe you were in, only to suddenly notice they were there and they encompassed and surrounded absolutely everything that made up your reality. That’s exactly how overwhelming the man’s understated presence felt once one finally began to take notice of it.

The two walked into the restaurant and walked up to a booth near the back of the establishment. The immortals that were already sitting in the booth looked up at the two. The group within the booth was made up of: a muscular man with orange skin and short and curly dark-gray hair; an inordinately tall and heavily built moon-elf, with caramel skin, hazel eyes, and straight blond hair that’s been twisted into dreadlocks; a tall and leggy green-haired woman, with deep-set purple eyes, light-green hair, and an odd slightly perverted air about her, despite her conservative dressing style; and finally, a tall half-devil, half-jotuness, with a pair of gleam black bull’s horns, orange skin, orange eyes, and mid-length light-purple hair with bangs that semi-obscured her eyes.

These immortals were the fire-god Garvan, the Fae-Prince Veselko, the goddess of intoxication Dilshad, and the Demon-Lord Yuval. The group of younger immortals was trying to do their own thing, because they’d grown tired of being caught up in the games of the older generation of gods, devils, and fae.

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“So you made it? I admit I kind of expected you two not to show,” said Yuval. Looking up at the immortal couple.

“Why wouldn’t we show? You invited us, didn't you?” said Jack. Casually playing with the space within the booth and sitting at the new spots at the outer edge of the booth rather than waiting for the group to make space for her. Creating a spot for her husband to sit in as well.

“True...But you never know with these kinds of things, do you? Veselko of the Court of Black Pearls. A pleasure to meet you, my dear,” said the Elder Fae-Prince. Shaking the pale woman's hand and giving it a light kiss in greeting.

“Charmed,” said the woman. Inclining her head lightly, and smiling, before pulling her hand from the man’s grasp.

The group briefly exchanged introductions. Veselko made a bit of a to-do over the fact that the two immortals introduced themselves as Jack and Jill Calloway, when their power, and history, suggested names that would require broken minds and dramatically altered vocal cords to pronounce.

“Anyway, we’re glad you’re here. Now take a load off and order whatever you want. No need to be shy. This establishment is one of the ones ‘I’ own,” said Yuval. Flashing a surprisingly friendly, sharp-toothed, smile.

“Much appreciated then,” said the tall immortal with the black-holes for eyes. Sitting down beside his wife and picking up and menu.

“So, what’s this chat you wanted to have, going to be about?” said the man, whose aura tasted like nothing, but carried a strength that felt like it could crush, or carry, countless worlds.

“Oh, nothing much. We were just thinking about making a group that’d be less full of strife. A group for young immortals like ourselves,” said Dilshad.

“Yes...We’ve had enough of forever wars, blood feuds, and scheming…” said Garvan.

“Or at least, we’d like to get a break from the dull kind that seems to go on for bloody ever and eat up time that could be spent on more useful affairs…” said Veselko.

“An interesting thought…” said the snow-haired woman.

“Yes...We actually might be interested in such a group. We also have friends who might be interested in that kind of relatively peaceful living as well,” said the man with black-holes for eyes.

“Oh? And how many friends are we talking about here?” said Yuval.

“Not too many...Just a few hundred million…” said the snow-haired woman. Her words brought a stunned silence to the table.

“That’s...That’s quite the number of friends,” said Garvan. Drinking some water to clear his throat. His high body temperature created a large amount of steam as a result of the clash in temperatures.

“Well, the larger portion is made up of a group that’s directly related us, but there are still a solid number that could be considered affiliated with, or aligned with us, and we’d love to be able to set some things up for them, ahead of time, since they’ll likely all be ascending soon,” said the man with black-holes for eyes.

“Ah, you had us scared for a moment. Imagine millions of new immortals just popping into being all of a sudden like that. Ascent isn’t just some joke, you know?” said Veselko. Laughing dryly. His tone was half-joking and half-scolding.

“We wouldn’t joke about this...The method that they’re using to ascend assures a conservative estimate of 80-percent success, with a possibility of re-attempt shortly afterward if they fail,” said the snow-haired woman.

"Actually, the system I set in place allows immediate reattempts if they've prepared certain items to protect against the negative effects of a failure," said the dark-eyed man.

This brought another lull as the group of immortals realized that the pair weren’t joking and they weren’t bluffing.

“I...Um, well...The more the merrier I guess...assuming that you’re serious,” said Yuval.

The little meeting then sort of petered out from there, as the group went its separate ways. Half the young immortals in the group of immortal juniors had to hasten their plans to set up their new faction. The other half was running to inform their allies in the various older factions of what they’d learned at the meeting.

The two hotshots went home, realizing for the first time that they probably should properly inform their host of their plans because the other immortals seemed to be treating the news like it was a fairly big deal.

They’d already told the Empress that they were planning to have more people living with them, but now they were thinking that they might need to be more explicit in regards to what they were intending for their portion of the Prism Spine mountain range.

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