《Jack and Jill Conquer the Shattered World》80: Smooze Like The Wind

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I found myself feeling exhausted in no time at all. I was surrounded by all these strangers. Most of which held some kind of grudge. All of which were looking to gain some kind of advantage from me and Jack. It was a tiresome situation and if Jack and I weren’t doing this for our alliance with the Dragons, and for the sake of our future clan, I probably would have bailed mid-way through. Since I had that other stuff to worry about, I kind of just had to stand there. Doing my best to look more confident and self-assured than I was.

Fortunately, as always, Jack tanked most of the social pressure. Taking the center stage alongside Kian. The two women made quite a pair. Their byplays and interactions almost seem choreographed. Watching as they took turns tearing apart some, stuffed-shirt, demon-lord that had popped out of nowhere to make some more threats and/or lurid advances, was like watching something on one of those nature documentaries. Kian set him up, and Jack tore his throat out...figuratively speaking...leaving the man blustering, and even more red in the face than the demon had been before.

Alas, I also had my own social interactions to deal with. Unfortunately, most of those interactions were of the annoying sort. Like now.

“You!...” said a tall, bearded man made of ice and snow.

“Mhm...Yes, me. Can I help you?” I said. My expression and tone kept bland and blank.

“You killed my son!” roared the man.

I blinked.

“Ah...Perhaps I did. Anything else?” I said. Acknowledging and accepting the charge, because during the stressful period when Jack was not okay, and after those idiots from the two pantheons started attacking us, I kind of snapped...And the end result was that I ended up killing far more folk so-called unkillable folk than I’d expected, or intended to. I didn’t feel bad about any of it, of course. “They” started it...Kill by the sword, die by the sword etcetera, etcetera…

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However, the fact remained that there were a lot of aggrieved folk that Jack and I would have to look out for because of my actions. Thankfully, I had access to the akashic realm, and I was already compiling a list of all my victims and their families. I was already making various plans of action, so that we could deal with them. I was already nipping a few troublesome cycles of vengeance in the bud through soft means, apologies, boons, blood prices...etcetera. I was also using hard means, and was already arranging for a few of the more annoying immortal clans to disappear beneath the sands of time...and fade from the annals of history.

“You killed my son!” said the man.

“Yes. We already went over that...And so what? Do you have a follow-up point beyond that? Or were we just retreading the past?” I said. Looking at the man like he was just a slightly interesting bug that had crawled up across my shoe.

The man’s eyes went wide. He glared at me, teeth grinding. I pressured him blatantly and with just enough pinpoint accuracy to avoid causing a stir with the rest of the crowd around us. He coughed up a little blood and made a strangled noise. Then he backed away and stalked off. I conferred with the myriad meta-thoughts that flowed within my head, and read the data for the man.

I pulled up a profile on his past and found that surprisingly I probably wouldn’t have to kill that particular man. His were bloody folk, but practical folk, they understood the life they were leading, and didn’t generally create needless grudges. There was no room for deep hatred when you lived a pugilistic life, it just turned everything bloodier and messier than it needed to be. The man had just come to bark a bit and see what my reaction would be. If I was weak he would have eaten me alive, perhaps literally. Now he’d taken my measure, and unless I showed weakness and gave him an easy opportunity in the near-future, he wouldn’t waste time plotting against me, when he already had dozens of others to plot against and worry about being plotted against by.

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“Excuse me…” said another voice. I felt a gentle, but heavy hand on my elbow.

I looked behind me and saw a woman standing there. It was another one of the Demon-Lords of the Shattered-World’s Hell. A tall, full-bodied woman, in a white dress. She had orange skin, and a pair of black-horns like a bull. Her hair was light-purple, mid-length, with a long fringe that covered her cold orange eyes. She carried a massive silver-fork, like it was the most natural thing in the world, and was trailed by a giant pot on bestial legs, and some kind of oven-beast, that radiated so much heat that it scattered the weaker immortals that tried to crowd in around her.

“Hi….” I said. Wondering what this devil wanted from me.

“Well, you killed my dad...I kind of wanted to say thanks,” said the woman. Smiling.

Her slightly different spin on the old script that I’d been getting all evening, broke my blank mask, and earned her a lifted brow from me.

“Okay...You’re welcome?” I said. Surprised to find that as far I could see, this demon was being sincere. Which was pretty odd in itself since devils and demons were supposed to be all about deception.

“I was also hoping to see if you might be amenable to a chat some time...Er, not here. Later. Me and some pals of mine, who’ve recently decided that we maybe don’t want to get involved with the squabbling and schemes of the older generation of gods and devils, were hoping to say hi,” said the lady devil.

“Huh...Okay. I can’t say yes, right now...But as soon as I discern that this isn’t some kind of elaborate trick, I’ll get back to you…” I said. My brow stayed raised.

The woman winced but smiled once more.

“That’s fair...Uh, I’m Yuval by the way. Demon-Lord of the Endless Banquet...I also, uh, happen to own a couple of the restaurants up here,” said the demoness.

My brow fell but I found myself smiling for the first time. My guard dropped by just a smidge, as I realized that in this entire time, this was the first proper introduction I’d received from any of the immortals present. The rest had essentially been boisterous, half-provocations, like a nation declaring itself to a neighbor in hopes of getting the other party to bow without trouble. It was nice to meet someone who still knew how to act like a person.

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