Through her binoculars, Mary Rose saw Alicia and Kirk talk to Chase and Torey, then get into Kirk's car and drive away.

“Good. They's a-splittin up,” said Mary Rose. She lowered the binoculars and looked at Lila Jean. “You ready there, Lila Jean?”

The cap-wearing girl cocked a rifle she was holding. In her ponderous voice, she said, “Damnation if I ain't.” She spat.

“Good,” said Mary Rose. “Ah'm goin' after Alicia an' her hunk. You stay here an faht that Chase gal. But don't you finish her off too soon, unnerstand? Ah needs you ta buy me some time. You got that, right?”

“Reckon so,” said Lila Jean humbly.

“Kin ah come with you, Mary Rose?” asked Louise hopefully. “Ah am sure you'll need somebody to hold that Alicia while ya steal her man, an' ah would be tickled pink if it could be me.”

Mary Rose shook her head. “Sorry Louise, but it's personified with me an' her. Ah gots to do this alone.” Then, to cheer her up, she said, “But you can hold all the folks you want here.”

Louise was successfully placated by this offer. “Really? All I want?”

“Sure, Louise. All you want,” said Mary Rose. She looked to Lila Jean. “Is that okay with you? It's your feud after all.”

Lila Jean shrugged. “Be mah guest.”

…...........

“Hang ten, daddy-o!” said Dracula, surfing a wave.

“This film make not sense,” said Chase, Torey's arm around her shoulders. “At first, sharp tooth guy scared of sun. Now, him like.”

“Well, he put sunscreen on,” explained Torey. “Now he can crunch all the hellacious waves he wants, brah.”

The scene cut to the beach, where a whole bunch of teens were gathered in front of a stage set up with a microphone, drum kit, and a couple guitars. A man walked out and said into the microphone, “Alright, Ladies and Gentlemen, the moment you've all been waiting for! Give a warm Southern California welcome to Skip Shannon and the Shout-Outs!”

The crowd cheered as some rebellious young men with hair so dangerously, threateningly long it almost touched their ears came out and started to play an upbeat surf rock song.

“Oh, these guys were a real-life band that was popular at the time. A standard element of any beach party movie,” explained Torey. “This scene was eighty-five percent of Dracula Beach Party's budget. That sounds like a made-up stat, but it really, tragically, is not.”

The band played the entire song, three interminable minutes of the movie's running length wasted on a montage of shots of them playing interspersed with shots of the dancing, swimsuit-clad crowd.

After the song was over, they brought Dracula up on stage. Skip Shannon said, “Alright, listen up! In honor of our new pal Dracu-doggie, we wrote a new song! Hit it, gang!”

They played a song called The Dracula Twist. Naturally, there was no way that was happening without Dracula doing the twist himself, up on stage, to the crowd's vocal approval. The movie ended soon after that, unwilling or perhaps even unable to top such an incredible sight.

Since the movie was a daytime matinee, it was still light out when the credits finished rolling. People started driving off, but Chase and Torey loitered around, enjoying each other's company.

“Tor,” said Chase, looking up at him. His arm was still around her, her head resting gently on the soft spot beneath his collarbone. “You boy friend now, okay?”

This caught him by surprise. “Wait, what?”

“Not want be with more man,” Chase elaborated. “Just Tor. So you boy friend, now.”

Once Torey wrapped his head around what she was saying, he was elated. He already hoped he might be her boyfriend, but it was hard to tell, with Chase, where they stood. He supposed those enigmatic elements of hers were some of the biggest things he liked about her. Hearing her say it out loud, hearing her set it in concrete, felt wonderful. “Well, thanks, Chase. I'm happy to hear that!” Not sure if Chase would consider it an appropriate response or not, he still decided to assure her, “And, uh, you're my girlfriend.”

This was, in fact, exactly what Chase wanted him to say. Hearing it brought a contented smile to her face. She relaxed back into him, and they sat for a while.

After everyone else was gone, they decided it was time they left, too. Torey said, “I have to close up, wanna help me?”

“Yes!”

But just as the two of them got out of Torey's car, the sound of a gunshot stopped them in their tracks.

Chase immediately went into battle mode. She whirled around to face the direction the sound came from.

Standing there, about fifty feet away, was Lila Jean, holding her rifle. It was pointed at the sky: Apparently, the shot was just to get Chase's attention. At her side were her fellow cheerleaders, all in uniform.

“Afternoon,” said Lila Jean simply. “Yore name Chase Campbell?”

“Yes,” said Chase. “Who ask?”

“Lila Jean,” said Lila Jean. “Lila Jean Swindle.” She paused, to let the significance of that name sink in. She spat.

Chase recognized their uniforms from the other day. “You cheer from run down town,” said Chase. “What you do here? Why guns?”

“Way-ul, it's simple really,” said Lila Jean, cocking the rifle. “Ah is a Swindle and you is a Campbell. Reckon that means we is a-feudin', an' a-one of us has ta die.”

Chase frowned, confused. “No, that not right. Us both cheer, that mean us friends. Name not do things.”

“Looky there, Lila Jean!” said one of the cheerleaders. “Lil' snake in the grass is try'na wiggle outta it!”

Chase ignored her. “Plus, Campbell not real name. Just pick name when come here.”

“Spineless city girl scared outta her boots! Just cuz it's seven against one!” guffawed another Swallered Opossum cheerleader. “What a baby!”

Torey spoke up. “I don't know what's going on, but it's NOT seven against one,” he said. “I've got your back, Chase.”

“No, Tor,” tried Chase. “Get in car. Lock doo-”

“No!” Torey interrupted. “No. Look, I let you handle that fight with that robot by yourself, and I felt like shit afterward. I know you're way more of a fighter than I am, I know you probably don't need me. But if I'm your boyfriend, that means even if you can handle this alone, I have a responsibility to you to see that you don't have to.”

Chase thought his responsibility was to not get himself killed so she could still have a boyfriend once the fight was over, but she understood his feelings. It was the same thing that kept Alicia, Caitlin, and Lindsey by her side when the going got rough.

Little did Torey know, however, that despite his noble plans, Louise was creeping up behind them. The girl jumped over the hood of his car and tackled him to the ground.

Torey fell face first to the pavement. Louise put all her weight on him, holding his arms firmly at his sides and digging her knee into his back, right between his shoulder blades. “Shoulda worried less 'bout yer girlfriend's back and more about yer own, boy.” He tried to throw her off, but couldn't. She giggled. “Go ahead an' struggle all y'want. Ah rather lahks it. Wouldn't be fun holdin' you if you didn't. G'wan, kick them legs. Make it excitin' f'r me.”

Chase was livid. “Hey!” she shouted, rounding on Louise. “You get off Tor!”

She moved to attack but didn't get far before Lila Jean turned her rifle on her. “Now don't you move, Miss Campbell,” the girl droned. “Sorry, but ya won't have yer boyfriend to pertect ya today. Yer gonna have to face us all by yer lonesome.”

She jerked her head toward Torey, and a couple of the other cheerleaders ran forward to help Louise tie him up. One knocked him out with a bat, and then the other one started searching his pockets. Chase had no choice but to watch, boiling with anger.

“Now, here's how ah thinks we should do this. Let me know if you have any suggestifications,” said Lila Jean. “Reckon you oughter have a gun, as it wouldn't be hardly sportin' to kill a Campbell in cold blood if she couldn't defend herself.”

One of the cheerleaders who tied Torey up slung her gun off her shoulder, then held it out to Chase as an offering.

Chase looked at it, then looked at Lila Jean, and said, “Not like gun. Not know how shoot one. No thank you.”

The other cheerleaders were dumbfounded. Lila Jean spat. “Well, ah offered. In that case, ah'll give you thirty seconds to run up into them woods.” She jerked a thumb at the hilly woods behind the drive-thru. “At which point we'll run in after you and set about pluggin' holes in you. What do you think, is that fair enough?”

Chase stood her ground. “I not run. Your guns not scare me. Did beat big bunch of guys with guns.” She tried to think of the name Alicia called them. “Hit team.”

Lila Jean did not look impressed. “You mean a SWAT team? That ain't nothin' ta get all puffed up about. They gots a few years trainin', sure. But any o' them been huntin' since they was three? Any o' them learn to shoot afore they learned to walk? More importantly, any o' them got Campbell-killin' blood in their veins? Reckon not. No ma'am, ah reckon not.” She called out to Jefra Mae, the girl who was frisking Torey. “That boy got a wallet?”

Jefra Mae pulled one out of the boy's right front pants pocket. She held it up and waved it. “Yup.”

“What's he got in it?”

The blonde opened the wallet. “Let's see...whoa, forty bucks! That's a new pair of leggin's!” She paused to relieve the wallet of the money it contained and stuffed the bills down her shirt. She moved on to the little card holders, flipping through them brazenly. “An' a student ID, an' a debit card... an' a photy! Of the Campbell gal!”

Lila Jean smiled. “Now ain't that nice? Yore man's got a photy of you in his wallet. Sure seems like a sweet, carin' feller.” She looked genuinely sentimental. “Ah wish ah had a man like that. Pull.”

Jefra Mae tossed the wallet up in the air, then Lila Jean trained her rifle on it. The card holders fluttered. She fired. When the bullet hit the wallet, it spun in space. It landed near Chase's feet, skidding slightly on the pavement.

“Go on, Miss Campbell. Pick it up,” Lila Jean encouraged.

Chase picked the wallet up. She flipped through the card holders. Then, she stopped. The picture of her had a perfect bullet hole in it, right through her face.

“Thirty seconds, Miss Campbell. Reckon Ah'll start the countdown now, if it's all th' same to you. Thirty... Twenny nine...”

….............

“Sorry,” said Kirk again, turning the key in the front lock and letting them inside.

He held the door for her, and Alicia walked in first. “No, no, it's really fine. I think this is neat, actually! I've never seen your house before.”

From the entryway, they were directly facing the living room, which contained a big screen TV and a shelf of DVDs and some video games. In the center of the living room was a comfortable-looking leather couch. Alicia could see the kitchen through a doorless entryway. The house was cool and dark. It didn't look, sound, or feel like anybody was home.

“Mom! I'm home!” he called. No answer. “Wonder where my folks are.”

Alicia suddenly felt a nervous excitement. Nobody was home? His parents weren't around? They were...alone?

This kind of changed everything. This wasn't an “alright, you can have a girl in your room, but you have to leave your door open” kind of situation. Were there...POSSIBILITIES here?!

She was terrified.

Kirk walked over to the TV, and turned it on, then looked at the family DVD shelf. “We'll just have to watch our own movie. What do you feel like?”

Alicia wanted to say a drama or romance, but figured he wouldn't want to watch something like that, and decided to pick something they'd both enjoy. “H-how about a comedy?”

“Oh man, I love comedies. We have all the classics,” he said, eyes scanning the shelf. “Frat House Weekend, Ronnie and Igor's Drunkest Spring Break, Kappa Delta Wasted...Hey, did you see Party Bros 3 yet?”

“Er, I haven't seen any of the Party Bros yet,” said Alicia, really wishing she'd said romance.

Kirk was shocked. “Seriously?! Wait, you're kidding, right?” Alicia shook her head. “Oh, man. Alicia, you have no idea what you're missing. Greatest movie series ever.”

He pulled Party Bros: Unrated Edition off the shelf, opened the case, and popped the disc in the DVD player. The two of them sat down on the couch. “I envy you right now,” he gushed. “To be able to experience Party Bros: Unrated Edition for the first time... Man. You're in for a real treat.”