This was ridiculous.

I stared sullenly at the little model of Boston I’d built. It was a terrible model. I made it out of wood, and someone might say it vaguely resembled a map of the city - if someone was generous, and possibly also the parent of a young child.

I was attempting to get a spell to let me know where some enchantments I’d hidden throughout the city were located. I’d successfully found enchantments in my own house, which wasn’t saying much, since I could do that with mage sense from the time I was three years old. Trying to use a spell to manage it outside the range of my mage sense, though…

I kicked the model of the city. A piece broke off. I kicked the piece. I stared at the notes I’d made for how to track the stupid enchantments - which were enchanted to broadcast a tracking signal, no less. The notes looked all sensible, organized, and perfectly valid.

Which meant my understanding of the subject was off in some fashion. Or my thinking was off. Or… my emotions. That was always a real possibility. I wasn’t sure if pent up frustration was necessarily the most compatible emotion to track things.

Or maybe I just was terrible with Aeros, and was simply outright failing to make it do what it was supposed to do. That was a possibility, too.

I kicked the model again.

Or maybe I was perfectly okay with Aeros, but this sort of tracking took a type of skill other than I anticipated. Or maybe I was missing some key idea that an average Aeros favoring spellcaster could answer in under three seconds.

But, of course, I had no spellcasters to ask questions. I had no one who understood magic enough to even bounce ideas off of. I had no books. I had no enchantments made by others for me to study, to glean insight. I didn’t even have experience with a scholarly, research focus on magic - as much as my parents tried to give me that, I’d refused with all the defiance a teenager can manage.

I was completely alone and I had no idea what I was doing.

And I was exhausted. I’d done nothing else for weeks. Pash had revealed to Liam that the Germans had stopped trying to find me, a week or so ago, which apparently meant that it was even more important for me to sit quietly while we figured out what they were up to.

I’d “invented” dozens of little spells, exploring different avenues to try, and half of them were a complete waste of time. The other half was entirely useless in application, only good as a form of practice, or confirming certain ideas.

For instance, I had successfully made a spell to track enchantments in my house, and was even able to bind that into another enchantment, and give it to Liam, who was able to find magic items with it. Even after temporarily blinding his mage sense. So obviously the fundamental idea worked.

Of course, for some reason, I couldn’t get the spell to work further than my own range at mage sense. Which was suspicious, since I didn’t know why my personal skill at mage sense would have anything to do with the range of a spell, unless I was accidentally using it as part of the process.

I sagged against the wall, trying not to cry.

All this time. All this effort. All this power. I could have saved a thousand lives in hospitals. I could have built a few dozen anti-bullet enchantments. I could have refined one of the spells that I already knew, expanding it into other applications, and had nearly guaranteed success - like how I’d done with the timeline magic, for Liam, all those months ago.

Instead, I couldn’t even tell anyone why I was failing.

A faint sound caught my attention and I dragged myself upstairs. The house was so lonely. I didn’t want to work in Liam’s apartment, though. Partly it was that he was distracting, but the bigger part was that I’d constructed a research lab in the basement, which had a variety of magical tools designed to help with the process.

Fat lot of good that did me, though. I kicked a stair on my way up.

The sound was the phone ringing. I glared at it sullenly, but at least I’d hear someone’s voice. Even Comet’s happy noises would have been nice, but the Councilor’s kids loved him so much that they decided to keep him when they left, after the trial.

“Hello?” I answered, trying my best to sound like I wasn’t about to bite off anyone’s head.

“Good, you answered,” Lou said, sounding relieved. “Been trying to reach you. Look, there’s a case, and you’ve gotta come to the scene. But be careful. No one sees you. Got it?”

“Um,” I said, rubbing at my eyes. “Sure? I can shift into a dog and head down. Where do I go?”

She gave me the address. “I’ll be here, and no one else is. Come down right away, if you can.”

“Very well,” I said. “I will leave immediately. See you soon, Lou.”

“See you,” Lou said. “And don’t forget about being careful.”

I just hung up.

No one commented on a dog running around the city with a map in his mouth, occasionally stopping in alleyways to check where he was going. I was practically invisible.

It only took about thirty minutes of running to find Lou. It was a nice break from enchantment work, and running as a dog was very relaxing. By the time I arrived, my mood had improved.

Lou’s mood, however, had not.

“I take it that’s you,” Lou said, giving me a funny look as I ran up to her, tail wagging.

“Woof,” I agreed.

“Right,” she said. “Come inside.”

She looked around nervously and then led me inside what looked like an abandoned apartment building. I expanded my mage sense. No one else was inside.

“Okay, you can go human now,” she said.

I nodded and shifted back. I’d barely begun when Lou turned green and looked away.

“Holy mother of god, that is disgusting,” Lou said, shuddering.

It was several seconds before I could respond.

“Liam finds it interesting,” I said.

“He finds everything interesting,” she said. “Including disgusting things. He’s head of homicide, Aera, seriously - nothing turns his stomach.”

“You have a point,” I said, smiling. “So why am I here?”

“I really want this to not be magic, but I don’t see another explanation,” Lou said. “I called O’Brien, and he agreed I should bring you in. Come on.”

She led me up a flight of stairs and into a cordoned off room. She pointed at a severed arm on the ground. I blinked at it in surprise.

“How long has that been there?” I asked.

“At least ten hours,” Lou said. “That’s when the landlord called. So probably a hell of a lot longer than that.”

“It looks healthy,” I said.

“Which is why you’re here,” Lou said. “Arms should not look healthy if they aren’t attached to people.”

I nodded and walked over to the arm. I knelt beside it and examined it curiously.

It was still alive, in a sense. Magic was actively flowing through it, keeping the cells alive, in a sort of stasis. No blood was flowing, and it would die soon, but the stasis effect was strong enough to keep it stable for some time yet. Based on its strength, I guessed that a spellcaster had lost his arm a few days ago, but hadn’t “let go,” magically.

I turned my attention to the actual injury. The “cut” was perfect. Too perfect. In fact, I’d only ever seen that kind… of…

“Oh gods,” I said, pulling back from the arm in horror, falling on my rear.

“What is it?” Lou asked. “It’s magic, right?”

“Lou…” I said, crawling backwards over to her.

“What? Aera, you’re freaking me out,” she said.

“You don’t understand…” I said.

“That is why you’re here,” Lou said. “Tell me what’s going on!”

“Teleportation,” I squeaked.

“I need more than that,” she said.

I closed my eyes, feeling a wave of panic fill me as my mind connected dots together. Tears began to flow, as my heart grew overwhelmed.

“Teleportation is not an easy spell, Lou,” I said. “To instantaneously travel from one place to another… it is monstrously difficult. It takes a large amount of power.”

“Keep going, Aera,” Lou said, keeping her voice warm and encouraging. “What does this mean?”

“This is a mistake in teleportation,” I said, swallowing past a lump in my throat. “A serious one - the caster either teleported his body away, and failed to bring his arm; or the caster successfully teleported his arm, but not the rest of his body.”

“Oh,” she said. “And that means what?”

My mind relentlessly assaulted me with conclusions. Terrifying, wretched conclusions. I could barely breathe. But explanations made sense to me… words fell from my mouth, in a detached monotone, at odds with my terror.

“There is someone in your world, who has somehow attained the ability to teleport with Aeros magic,” I said. “This someone, or several someones, is new at this. This means that magic is being learned.”

“Why are you freaking out this much, though?” she asked.

I turned around and clutched at her shoulders. She had to understand.

“Someone is learning Aeros magic,” I said, pleading. “The same domain as mind altering magic. Powerful, complex Aeros magic - far beyond me, requiring skill and knowledge on par with what I have with Aquas. Whoever this caster is, he or she is my equal or better. And he or she is improving.”

“How’s that possible?” she asked.

“Here is a guess, Lou, that terrifies me,” I said. “What if Germans acquired enchantments, and they did, in fact, figure out how to awaken themselves with these enchantments? And one of these enchantments was a teleportation device - of which there are many in my parents’ home. Using said device would not cause this sort of damage - but if they reverse engineered it, and have begun training soldiers in the use of teleportation…”

“Then they might be able to use teleportation, but badly enough to make a rookie mistake,” Lou said, frowning at the arm. “Any other guesses?”

“We know, for certain, that someone used teleportation magic, badly,” I said. “No one could realistically have figured it out entirely on their own, in five years, even if spontaneously awakened. No conceivable use of an enchantment of my parents’ could go this badly. If they knew teleportation before coming here, it’s inconceivable that they’d still be this bad. Therefore, someone must have gained that ability from a text, or enchantment, or something. What can explain that?”

As I spoke, I calmed down enough to really look at Lou. That’s when I realized that she was, in fact, panicking. It was just that her way of panicking involved going cold and staring down the problem like she thought she could make it flinch if she growled at it enough.

“Why’s the arm still all pink and stuff?” she asked.

“The magic never let go,” I said. “Whoever did this - they didn’t come back for their arm, but didn’t let it go, either.”

She took a deep breath. I used the opportunity to continue to try to not panic.

“You think it’s the Germans,” she said after a second, not looking at me.

“Who else could it be?” I asked.

“Here,” she said, seeming to ignore my question. “In Boston. There are Nazis here.”

She muttered something vaguely obscene sounding under her breath.

“I guess that explains why they’re not looking for you anymore,” she said, sounding glum.

“What should we do?” I asked.

“I have no idea,” she said, sitting down on the floor next to me, staring at the exposed innards of the arm.

“We should call Pash,” I said.

“What?” she said. “Why?”

“Because this is beyond us,” I said. “If the Germans are here, in America, if they have the ability to teleport… then it would be wrong to keep it from the military. And he might have an idea what to do.”

“He’s going to try to take you,” she said, her voice oddly monotone.

I shivered.

“Not today,” I said, clutching at my dress. “I won’t go anywhere with him today.”

“Yeah,” she said. “You’re a mess.”

“We have to show this to him,” I said. “Do you know how to reach him?”

Her face tightened. “Yeah. I know his number.”

“Call him,” I said. “Bring him here.”

“You’re sure about this, Aera?” she asked.

I just looked at her.

She cursed again.

“Fine,” she said. “Wait… around, I guess. I’ll go find a phone.”

I stared at the blurry image of the arm for a brief instant, and then Lou was back next to me. I realized I’d gotten a little stiff from not moving.

“He’s on his way,” she said.

We both sat there silently. My eyes started hurting from crying too much.

There was a knock on the door.

Lou got up. She went to the door, opened it, and just walked back to me. Pash stood there with an intrigued look. When he caught my tear-soaked expression, he looked wary.

“Thank you for contacting me,” Pash said cautiously. “Officer Williams provided no details; if I may ask what has happened?”

“Take a look, investigator,” Lou said, pointing at the arm.

Pash walked carefully over to the arm and examined it for a moment, without touching. He seemed particularly intrigued by the “cut” side, getting a close look at the bizarrely healthy flesh that appeared openly exposed to the air.

“Fascinating,” he said, then stood and looked at me. “Could you provide more insight?”

I nodded, wiped my eyes dry, and explained the conclusions of my examination. I didn’t mention the biggest problem - the fact that they were learning magic. I gave the impression that it was probably just enchantments.

“The arm is still attached to the caster?” he asked.

“Yes, sir,” I said.

“Can you find out anything about who it’s attached to?” he asked.

“Oh,” I said. “Um, yes, actually.”

I stood up and walked back over to the arm. Kneeling, I reached my magesense inside, examining the magic. Then my “grip” turned aggressive, as I sought to pull at the magic, to understand details of its connection.

“He’s using an enchantment,” I said. “So I can’t get see too much of his soul. I was able to… oh.”

“What?” Lou asked, getting closer.

“He noticed my attempt,” I said, as the magic seeped out of the arm and the blood in the veins started emptying on the floor.

“Could he have learned more about you just now?” Pash asked.

“Depends on his skill,” I said. “Most likely, he just noticed someone tugging at his magic, and decided to break the connection before I found too much. But it does mean he knows I’m onto him.”

“Better and better,” Lou said sourly.

“Ms. Koryn,” Pash said somberly. “If the Germans have found you, then the situation has become far too dangerous for you to remain in hiding. You require the military’s protection.”

“What could the military possibly do to protect me from spellcasters?” I asked.

“There are many options,” he said. “Based on what you’ve indicated, they have no capabilities beyond what you could construct yourself, correct?”

“I am specialized in different magic,” I said. “But other than that, yes.”

“If you create enchantments, soldiers can be equipped to protect you accordingly,” he said. “Further, you can be given information necessary to better protect yourself. Most importantly, by preparing the military to handle the situation, Germany’s advance should be able to be stymied, requiring their casters to focus elsewhere.”

I closed my eyes.

“Not today,” Lou said. “Just tell us what you know about this, and we’ll… we’ll talk about it.”

“Officer Williams, if I may, I am concerned that your discussions with Ms. Koryn appear to universally result in concluding that she should hide in your home, regardless of what she feels is best.”

“With all due respect, Pash, she’s not ready to handle people squeezing her dry.”

“Yes, I am,” I said, opening my eyes.

“Aera, seriously, would you stop that?” Lou said.

“I can handle that, Lou,” I said. “Why do you never have faith in me?”

She rubbed at her face and looked at Pash.

“Not today,” she said. “Aera needs some time to think.”

Pash simply looked at me and I exhaled slowly.

“I assure you, Lieutenant, I take this matter extremely seriously,” I said. “I will not engage in discussion with Lou or anyone over whether or not I will address the matter - I simply must do so. I do, however, need time to consider what approach is best, with this new information.”

“As you wish, Ms. Koryn,” Pash said. “When should I expect your call?”

“Within a week, at most,” I said.

“Very well,” he said, inclining his head. “I will make preparations and await your call. Thank you for informing me of this matter.”

He turned to Lou.

“Officer Williams, considering that this is the result of enemy forces on our land, I will need to take this arm as evidence,” he said.

“I don’t care,” Lou said. “You want it, you take it up with my boss. I’ll sign whatever paperwork is involved.”

“As you wish,” he said. “Good luck to you both.”

With that, he turned and left.

Lou just groaned.

“What the hell are we going to do…” she said, glaring at the arm as though this was its fault.

“We talk to Liam and Slick,” I said. “We tell them to meet us at our house at a certain time, according to schedules, in a few days. Until then, we all think.”

The house was quiet when I got home. I supposed I could have gone to Liam’s, but it didn’t feel right. The faint echo of my footsteps were the only thing I could hear as I went straight through the house and out the back door.

The yard was in an overgrown and wretched state. My feet slowly pulled me into the center, where my garden had once thrived. The bushes were still there, though they were plain. Still, my mind’s eye could see the beauty that once grew here. I found myself at that place again, where roses of fire and ice once grew, where I had shared precious moments with Benjamin.

In the peace of that broken place, thoughts came to me more freely. This place, where Benjamin had knelt beside me and wished for a simple life with me at his side… here was my last farewell. My last surrender of a peaceful existence.

A surrender of my childhood, perhaps. My time of carefree whimsy was nearly past. My time of being able to rely on the judgements of others, to trust in them, was over. In a few days, I would be isolated from those I held close to my heart, and I would have to judge my own best course.

I’d assured everyone that I could handle this. But… could I?

A deep fear paralyzed me. I didn’t want to be held back, and yet, the idea of moving forward...

There were no sounds save for chirping birds and rustling leaves.

“Aera, seriously, you need to eat something,” Lou said. “It’s been three days.”

I didn’t respond.

“Aera,” Lou said, sounding frustrated. “If you don’t do something other than stare at that bush, I’m going to take this sandwich and shove it down your throat, one bite at a time.”

A faint smile tugged at my lips, cracking the salt lines of dried tears on my face.

“So you do hear me,” Lou said.

She sat down next to me and sighed.

“There is water and energy in the garden,” I said, not taking my eyes from the bush. “I don’t really need to eat.”

“Right,” Lou said, sounding like I’d said something she didn’t want to think about. “Can you tell me what the problem is?”

I closed my eyes.

“I don’t know what to do,” I whispered. I took a breath, and said in a more normal tone, “I know what my family would do. But me…? I just… I don’t know.”

“Well, you can start with that,” she said, her tone encouraging. “What would your family do?”

“My mother is easy,” I said with a faint chuckle. “She’d have never been in this position. She’d have just taken over the world and been done with it.”

“Let’s not go with that one,” Lou said dryly.

“My father would have been cautious,” I continued, smiling a little at her comment. “He’d have taken time aside, much like I ended up doing, but he’d have used the time to build a proper home for himself here. Full of enchantments. When he felt he was effectively immune to anything your people could manage, he would have presented himself to governments. He’d have made a very simple arrangement - they either play by his rules, and gain access to his power, or they refuse, and he goes elsewhere. Any remotely sane government ought to cooperate with that.”

“That’s… possible?” Lou said, sounding surprised. “I’d never thought about an approach like that. Could you have done that?”

“Easily,” I said, sighing. “The arrangement, not the enchantments. I’d be more vulnerable than him, but I could have done that, too. It’s sort of the standard approach of powerful spellcasters, if they want to work with governments.”

“Why didn’t you try something like that?” Lou asked.

“Because it was never up for discussion,” I said, looking down at the ground. “I was simply told that the government would be victorious against me, no matter what I did, and I was never told why, no matter how I asked. I was always treated as naive for thinking otherwise.”

“...oh,” Lou said, shifting a little. “Um, what about your brothers?”

“Eivan, the older of the two, would have talked a big game, but would probably end up cooperating with whatever government got to him, after a while,” I said. “He could be difficult and rebellious, but not particularly driven. He’d have given up fighting, to take an easier course.”

Lou nodded.

“That’d be dangerous,” she said. “And the youngest brother?”

“Nordrid,” I said. “He was sweet. It’s hard to know for sure, since he was only twelve when I last saw him, but my guess is that he’d have found a way to put his foot down about the usage of his power. He’d shown a knack for mind magic, and probably would have been inclined to heal broken minds and hearts.”

“Heal broken minds and hearts?” Lou asked.

“If someone’s addicted to drugs, to make them not addicted,” I said. “If someone suffers from painful memories, to take the sting out of them. If someone’s sexually attracted to wrong things, like children or what have you, to simply correct their desires. That sort of thing.”

“Huh,” she said. “Can you do that?”

“Only temporarily,” I said. “If they cooperated, I might manage something that’d last a few months. He couldn’t do permanent things, either, but by the time he turns my age, I bet he could.”

She nodded.

“So what’s the right approach for you?” Lou asked.

I hugged my knees close.

“My father’s seems best,” I said. “But… I don’t know if I can manage it.”

“A sandwich is a good place to start,” she said, holding it up.

Another smile tugged at my lips.

“I don’t think I can eat anything, Lou,” I said. “My throat is too tight, my stomach too unsettled.”

“Then you need to find a way to be okay again,” she said. “What would help?”

I closed my eyes and didn’t respond for a minute.

“Have you talked to the others about getting together, before I go to Pash?” I asked.

“Yeah,” Lou said.

“Making decisions can be difficult,” I said, my eyes still closed. “Once things get going… I’ll be fine.”

She exhaled slowly.

“It’s hard to believe that, what with you being out here for three days, refusing to eat, drink, or talk to anyone,” she said.

I shrugged.

“Remember the Cocoanut Grove?” I asked.

“Yeah?” she said.

“I was in a wretched state until Slick told me that I could do something,” I said.

“Then you just did whatever you needed to,” she said, nodding slowly. “I get that. So what you’re saying is, you want to just go ahead, get everyone together, and get started?”

Panic surged in my heart and she flinched at the look on my face.

“You don’t want to decide that,” she said.

“I need to,” I said through gritted teeth, tears flowing freely again.

“I understand,” Lou said, and held the sandwich out. “Eat up. When you do - and only then - I’ll get the others and let you know when it’s time.”

I sighed and took the sandwich.