Thomas sat down next to Javqua at the dinner table, and the two of them were awkwardly silent. Thomas occasionally glanced at her while she studied the table and floor, hunched over.

There was an enormous roast in the center of the table, and Javqua’s father was in the process of cutting it up - simply going to town with his sharp claws while trying not to shred it too much.

“Hurry up, I’m hungry!” Ora exclaimed, but a glare from Javqua’s mother silenced her.

“Here - I forgot to get you one.” Thomas heard Lyra’s whisper from behind, and he turned to see the girl offering him what looked to be a prong. He quietly thanked her as she rushed to her seat.

Javqua’s father settled down in his chair. “Alright! Let’s eat!” He rumbled, and everyone began piling food onto their plates.

Thomas used the prong to put some meat on his plate - before using his fingers to bring it to his mouth.

The meat was tough but good - it had a rich, strangely sweet taste, and Thomas finished eating quickly.

Even with their bigger portions, Javqua and her family finished eating before him, most likely due to their carnivorous teeth.

Stuffed, Thomas sat back in his chair before Javqua’s mother spoke.

“If you don’t mind me asking, can you...talk about humanity? Things like...your history, ideals, and morals. Just curious.” She asked.

“No, I don’t mind. Just...let me think. Our history is...very complicated.” Thomas said as he thought of where to start.

“So, we humans evolved from furry tree climbing mammals, originating in a continent called Africa…” Thomas began, realizing he’d have to elaborate further.

“Africa was one of the seven continents we had on our old planet, Earth - there was Europe, North America, South America, Asia, Oceania, and Antarctica.” Seeing their puzzled faces, he explained more.

“Our old planet Earth had multiple land masses separated by massive oceans, instead of one giant continent. They were different climates too, the northern regions generally being colder and the southern ones being warmer.” Thomas explained.

“What do you mean...old planet?” Javqua asked, confused.

“We humans created a lot of problems for our planet - we burned a lot of...unrenewable fuels for energy, which went into our atmosphere and changed it’s composition, which heated up our planet. This made our planet much hotter, and it eventually caused ecological collapse.” Thomas said grimly.

He looked at the aghast faces of Javqua and her family, and he felt ashamed of his ancestors - too bad there was nothing he could do to change the past.

“Eventually, it got so bad, that the different nations of Earth-”

“Different nations?” Javqua’s father cut in, and Thomas nodded.

“Yeah - we humans never united into one nation - there were more than a hundred different nations, all with their own culture, history, traditions, customs, and more.”

“But...but why?” Javqua’s mother asked, and Thomas shrugged.

“Humans are...like that. Let’s just say that for now.” He said.

“So yeah, as our planet crumbled, some of our world leaders decided to send as many people as they could to other Earth - like planets, to start anew.” The dining room was dead silent, and Thomas continued speaking.

“My people originated from a country called Great Britain, and we took off using three ships; the HMS Victory, the HMS Belfast and the HMS Endeavour. We travelled using basic first generation FTL, and rudimentary cryo-pods. Of course, other countries had their own versions and methods, but the end goal was the same. It took us several hundred years of travel to arrive at our new planet.” The room was somehow even quieter, and Thomas was starting to feel slightly uncomfortable, shifting around in his chair.

“When our colonists landed on the new planet, they named it New Britannia, after our country.” He cleared his throat, continuing.

To be honest, Thomas was starting to get slightly concerned for his listeners well being, as they stared at him, shocked, while all the while craving to know more. He hoped they wouldn't end up like his history class.

...wait. He didn't remember giving them that disclaimer crap… Well, it’s too late now, and they seem fine… yeah, they’ll be fine. This was further clarified, when Javqua used the short silence to speak.

“You gonna continue or what? I wanna know more!” She exclaimed.

“I’m just thinking of my words carefully so you don’t pass out again!” Tom joked, and Javqua began to ponder.

“Now that I think about it, why did I pass out? It was very distressing news, yes, but it shouldn't have had that much of an effect. Did you notice anything wrong that day, Thomas?” She asked.

Thomas thought for a moment before answering. “Well no, not really. But thinking back on it, I think I smelt something...weird in the room before you all dropped.”

It was then that Ora cut in, “You gonna tell the story or what? I wanna hear more about you humans and less about bad smells!”

“Right, right, sorry.” Thomas said, going back on track, as Javqua’s father looked sternly at Ora.

“So anyways, our colonists released genetically modified plants and animals from Earth onto New Britannia, to assimilate with the native life. Then, after gathering resources, they began building a settlement. They built infrastructure, houses, and a school, for all the future citizens.” Thomas noticed Javqua and her family beginning to relax, pleased at the happy turn of events.

“At the start, we elected leaders democratically, but at some point, we decided to elect an emperor, as a joke, and it somehow got integrated into our society.” Thomas continued.

“Some said we should officially change back to a democracy, but...we haven’t gotten around to it yet.” He chuckled. “Oh well, that’s how us humans are.”

“There’s also something I should mention.” Thomas paused, wondering how Javqua and her family would react.

“Over the course of a few hundred years, we began to evolve on our new planet - and, with a lot of genetic modification to adapt and improve, we changed. So, in a way, we’re not really humans, we’re…a subspecies, and we look a bit different compared to our other human counterparts.” Thomas watched as the minds of Javqua and her family shut down for a second, and he smiled.

“Wait...what? You're not...what did humans use to look like?” Javqua stammered.

“Well, New Britannia is extremely cloudy, and it's nights are a lot longer than on Earth. So, we slowly lost most of this thing called melanin in our skin. Melanin protects us from U.V rays, but in the process, makes our skin darker. So, the old Earth humans had darker skin than us.” Thomas explained.

“So...you humans used to be...gray?” Lyra said timidly.

Thomas chuckled. “No, no. We had a wide variety of skin colours on Earth. There were pale, white-skinned people like me, and people who were light brown, or black.” He said.

“Wow!” Ora said. “Brown? Like poop?” She said, and Thomas cringed slightly, and he watched as Javqua’s father reached over and held Ora’s jaws shut. He could tell that Mr. O’dea was trying not to laugh - a hint of a smile on his scaly face.

Thomas didn’t mind - kids were going to be kids, and he continued.

“Our new homeworld also had higher gravity than Earth, and so, we got shorter and stronger. At six feet, I’m actually considered tall for a New Britannian, but…not anymore, I guess.” Thomas said.

“Wow! That’s why you're so small and weak looking!” Ora had somehow escaped her father’s grasp and was talking again.

At least, until she was slapped in the maw by a fluffy pillow, courtesy of her older sister Lyra.

“That’s it Ora! Go to your room!” Mrs. O’dea said sternly. “You’ve been rude enough!”

Ora opened her mouth to speak, but decided against it, stomping upstairs and presumably to her room.

“I’m sorry about that,” Mrs. O’dea apologized, and Thomas nodded.

“Uhh thanks, yeah. I’m okay though, I didn't take it offensively - she’s...funny, in a way.” He said.

“Moving on…over the next few hundred years, we began progressing rapidly. With a fresh planet full of resources, we eventually developed technologies like proper FTL. Eventually, we began spreading to other stars and terraforming them, and then, we began trying to reach out to the other nations of Earth-”

Before Thomas was able to speak any further, he heard a loud gasp. Looking over to Javqua, he saw her look behind him in shock. Turning around, he looked at Ora standing in the middle of the stairs, holding a large container.

Thomas looked closer, and his eyes widened. It was labelled Glitter.

The little girl attempted to douse them all in glitter…too bad she didn't have the strength to do it properly. Instead, she dropped the open container over the railing and wouldn't you know? Straight onto Thomas’s head.

Thomas, accepting his fate, didn’t even try to dodge the stream of glitter, instead glaring at the O’dea family.

“Why do you people have so much fucking glitter?” He yelled before the world went...very shiny.