Faline

Out of the corner of my eye, I see his head incline slowly. Maii pokes his head in before darting back out, so I make my way slowly to the door while keeping her in my sights. When she tries to take another step towards me, Nicolaus grabs her arm and scowls at her. She looks up at him and pants out through her bloodied lips.

"You are going to let her treat me this way?"

Her high pitch hurts my ears, his softer tone is much more welcome.

"You initiated Madaline, this is your doing. Be glad she stopped when she did."

With her focus on him and vise-versa, I slip out quickly. Maii falls into step beside me, knowing me well as he directs us to the bathroom, even holding my clothes for me as I scrub myself raw in my attempt to wash the past couple hours away. Tears mix with the water, the cramping having stopped with the adrenaline rush. Old blood streams from between my thighs, my forcing him through as well as his vigorous ending stretching and ripping thin skin. I'd be infertile by now even if I weren't undead; too much internal scarring.

This time I can't blame him since I initiated and went through with it. My eyes close at the knowledge that I just made things worse for myself yet again. The way I'm going, I'll be dead by the end of the week. I snort at myself, as if I know what day of the week it is anyway. Standing under the steaming hot water for quite some time after my skin is rubbed raw, time itself doesn't really seem to matter.

Everything heals fast though with all the potent blood still carried. If things hadn't stopped when they did, I'd still be in there with him, either going at it again or him still wrapped around me. A large sigh comes from me, I don't know what to do with Nicolaus.

My feelings about him are all sorts of screwed up. I know part of it is because he's the one who converted me, but it's still confusing. Grabbing the towel and drying off, I walk up to my shadow.

"What am I going to do Maii? I'm screwed no matter which way I go."

I talk softly, but he hears me with no problem, facing the outer door with his back to me. He turns slowly, his eyes having no trouble staying on my face as my top and skirt are held out. Tying the towel around me, I take the skirt to one of the free-standing sinks and do a quick rub-over on the material that had been between sweaty bodies.

Whole thing frankly reeks of sex, but unless I wash it, that isn't going to change. What the hell, grabbing some of the strong-smelling soap, I rub it over the whole damn thing.

Taking it to the showerheads where I rinse it, have to do my best not to tear it when wringing it out, then shake it out and hold it to my nose. Strong soap has indeed overpowered any sex smells. The top only smelling of sweat is fine. It does carry a hint of sex, but nothing really strong and will be mostly covered from the scented skirt and apron when I get back to it.

Going back to Maii while waving around the damp scraps, I might have screwed up the design, but oh well. Sighing, I look from it to the boy who mirrors my look of sadness and frustration. Slipping the clothing on, I touch his cheek lightly, looking over his face before settling on his eyes.

"You're too good to be in this place, little coyote. Don't let it ruin you as it has me. If something does happen to me, stay strong where I couldn't."

His eyes well up as he steps forward and hugs me hard. I return it, tucking my face into his neck. Not hard to do since he's only a couple inches taller than I. Maii's scent has actually become comforting to me, so I inhale deeply.

The action does trigger that ever-present hunger, but it's easily pushed aside. We break away, his face tinged pink. It's quite adorable, and I leave him with it unpestered.

"Alright, let's go see how much stuff got wasted from my being taken away from it."

He smiles and off to the kitchen we go. We even get all the way there without being bothered. Only pass a couple of human submissives who drop quickly to 'show respect'. A small smile from me makes them beam from the attention.

Since becoming a Vampire, I've been considering myself in an almost in-between spot; half-Vamp and half-human. Relating more to humans because I'm so new. But with all the fighting I've been doing, I'm afraid of becoming more predator over one who has a conscience.

I seriously hope that, in staying close to the animals and humans, it will help me stay 'human'. I'd rather be an animal than like any of the Vampires here. Maybe what I have to keep doing, after done in the kitchen, is go into the cellar, shift, and sleep there.

Only kitchen crew members ever go into it, and unless directly asked, I don't see them just outright telling anyone where I am. Of course now that I think of it, I start itching to go into animal form. I put it off for now, telling myself I will later.

Walking in, everyone looks relieved and happy that I'm back. Go figure the 'lowest' ones in this monster house are the ones keeping me sane. Smiling at them all, I head straight to my counter.

Kerry had saved everything from my sauce, covering it and turning the heat off so it didn't burn, to my noodles that are cooked, covered, and set off to the side. Eggs are boiled and set to the side as well. Giving her a hug and thank you, I get back to making my masterpieces.

Shrimp in a white sauce pasta with lemon and garlic. Seasoned, breaded, and fried mushrooms with a lot of deviled eggs that are also seasoned variously, they kind of remind me of Kie, she hates eggs, both sight and smell. Hates them, but will have bouts of cooking frenzies that will have her making every dish she knows how to that involves them. Apparently she likes how versatile they are. She can be really random at times.

Thinking of her makes me smile, raising my eyes to the painting. It reminds me of all the 'prophecy' crap going around. Lady has lived for over two hundred years. No wonder she's so cranky. She's old.

Her words while 'punishing me' still ring in my ears and hurt. It has me wondering if what I did with Nicolaus was me actually wanting him, or a way to get back at her. Think it may have been a combination, to be honest.

Wolf made of light and a cat from shadow. From everything I've been able to find out, it does sound more and more like her and I. Always pegged her as being the dark one though.

There are nine of us working here in the kitchen. The newish animal crew, Kerry, Maii, and me. Kerry has really taken to making desserts to keep the salad bar stocked with goodies. Seeing as how all slaves expend a lot of energy when they're with a patron, sexually or as a donor, which tends to go hand in hand quite a bit, as well as other duties, having sweets around is a good thing.

When in moderation anyway. I've laid out all the warnings I'm going to give, if they don't take heed, then it's on them. I'd heard a couple of the humans had gotten sick from in-taking too much of the fudge.

I was ready for anyone to try and say it was my fault, but no one did, so I'm happy. Maii is like my gopher, retrieving things for me or doing odd jobs I set him to. With a few hours mixed in of him practicing on his letters, he's picking it up really fast.

He's getting to the point that I can ask for a smaller word and he will write it out for me. His penmanship needs work, but I'm not about to be anal about that. It's not doctor bad and legible, so it's all good.

Salem, one of the female Werewolves, and Scarlett, the red fox Shifter, are making up small subs thick with meat that can be taken on the go. Marie, the other Werewolf, and Lex the lynx Shifter, work on getting food cut or chopped up for salads or the various other things getting made by the others. All while Ty, the clouded leopard Shifter, and Joey, the WereBobcat, rotate between dishes and cleaning the machines between use.

Salem and Joey were the ones who'd stepped forward to help feed me and they're also the only other two here aside from Kerry and I who can read and write. I'd taken each aside and asked them both as well as Kerry later on, that if something happens to where I am unable, if they could keep up with Maii's learning. They all nodded, a little worried, so I told them I'd ask the Mistress and let her know I asked them as well.

Turns out that isn't why they're worried, instead upset that I seem to be making plans of me not being around. I just give each a smile and tell them I'm just trying to prepare, even going as far as telling them that I've had an uneasy feeling since I first passed out in Lady's office.

They all nod, but for the next few hours I catch them giving me curious looks. While they're doing that, I get another menu planned out, complete the list of items that need to be restocked, and write up more recipes that I can remember. I'm also sure to let the others who can read and write know that they're more than welcome to add any that they know.

After looking through everything that's written and checking to see if I'd already got them down, I get tonight's menu items written in. Hard and softshell tacos, loaded potato wedges, and onion rings. I know my dietary stats are all screwy, but eh, oh well. I was given free rein on what to get an order, so I make it worth it. Why bother with spam when you can have shrimp?

Also make sure to put down that beans can be added into the tacos, but to be wary as beans can cause gas. Have to lay my head down as I picture a patron trying to go to town, only to get blown out from explosive expelled air. That would be horrible, and I can just imagine the embarrassment, but it's hilarious to picture.

Could be one way to get someone off you I guess, but could also lead to other non-enjoyable things that can turn out to be just as worse. Also make the same note at the chili and heavy egg recipes. Then just decide to put in a whole new sheet with the listing of things that I know can cause irritable bowels.

I get in there about lactose intolerance, common allergens, raw meat being bad for normal humans, and a list of liquids to give for different ails. Ones I know of anyway. Wasn't going to originally, but I put down on the list going to the Mistress that coffee pots would be good.

Almost put down tea kettles, but I recall seeing a few of those in the cellar, so just put down different types of tea. Putting a note beside it that her healer could also use them as well. I don't see colds getting passed around here, but you never know. Besides, there's always plenty to have a headache over.

Probably a very good thing the Vamps around here can't have caffeine, that alone is enough to put horror stories in your head. Clipping the list back on the fridge and running a finger over the cat magnet's back, I turn and get to work. I get weird looks from the others after fingering the plastic figure, but Kerry explains it to them when she notices.

I just ignore it, acting like I'm too focused on what I'm doing to hear them, getting Lex and Marie who're already chopping vegetables to get put aside. Lettuce, tomatoes, chives, black olives, and onions for the tacos, then show Maii how to cut up other onions for the rings. I pull out several large fifteen-pound bags of taters from the cellar, get them rinsed, sliced, seasoned, and put in to bake. Good thing the ovens are so large.

Both types of taco shells are already stocked from me putting them down before, so I don't have to make them. Which is good since I'm not entirely sure how to. Both beef hamburger and sausage get put together to get cooked, cheese that's already shredded is set aside while other cheese is made up for the wedges. Getting out bacon, the sour cream is left in the fridge, but set to the front, then I finally get to the breading and batter for the rings. Since just about everything is made in such large batches, my measurements get kinda screwy, but that's what Kerry's for. She's my guinea pig since I can't taste anything. I've even made sure she wouldn't lie to me by putting her through a small test.

I made something I knew was good and had her taste it, then made something I knew was bad. She let me know it was horrible, her face afterward made me laugh so hard my stomach cramped. The Shifter wasn't too thrilled at first, but she eventually joined my craziness.

Felt good to laugh, but after doing so, I knew something was going to come and ruin it, always seems to work that way. Going back to being relatively quiet as I wait for it, I even try to keep from looking around and making it obvious that I'm searching for something. Doesn't work, so I end up telling them what I'm doing. I get a bunch of 'Ahhs' and they get all paranoid looking as well.

Way to go Faline, make everyone as crazy as you.