《Do You Like Skydiving?》1.24 - Stitches

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Before the crime fighting and the tragic origin story, Cadell spent his nights binge reading manga instead of completing homework or revising for exams. He always seemed to evade getting in trouble when it was time to submit assignments, either by clever excuse or copying off a classmate.

But then the dreaded exams would come.

Cadell would wake up on those mornings like a zombie. Bags underneath very tired eyes, he’d walk into the exam hall with a look of defeat already stuck on his face. All those close calls had only been a way to prolong the inevitable truth which was failure.

The memory brought a grimace to the superhero’s face as he skydived from the crimson sky with a heinous individual. He turned to look at his flailing victim whose eyes were threatening to bulge out of their sockets. “I think the reason that memory resurfaced is because I’m in a similar situation. I spent all day fighting crime praying to not encounter my fear but-”

“I’m sorry! Don’t kill me! Yo-”

Cadell squashed the criminal's mouth with a hand. “Can you not interrupt? Can’t you see I’m going through something here?”

Reaching terminal velocity, they continued to plummet, “I lost my train of thought. Oh, right. Even though I’m not that student anymore, I feel like I’m in a similar situation. I thought I was lucky during the day but I wasn’t. The problem will present itself tonight. There’s no escape. The exam is coming. Do you feel me?”

The criminal nodded. Cadell frowned. “No, you don’t. You just don’t want every bone in your body to shatter into pieces. But you should have thought of that before kidnapping that woman. And dude, you were way too excited. I haven’t seen such a bright orange in a while. You were gonna do a madness, weren’t you?”

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They both plunged into a portal horizontally placed on the ground and another portal spat them up into the crimson skies. Technically, Cadell could change his catchphrase to “Do you like bungee jumping?” but that would ruin the surprise for those who didn’t know.

The intention behind the torturous ordeal was slightly more than inducing fear. In fact, for hours on end, a younger and much more insane Cadell once planned the routine as if it were a complex circus act.

The hope was this...

As the criminal raced towards the earth’s surface at roughly 150 miles per hour, no matter how tough they were, they would fully process the coldness of death and have the sudden awareness that the distance between them and the ground was the distance between them and never seeing their dog again. Or never meeting their friends again. Or never entering their home again. Or never tasting food again. Or never experiencing anything of value.

Results varied. Some changed their ways, some just defecated themselves, and every “skydiver” was haunted by the experience.

Cadell and his victim finished their superpowered bungee jump by entering a portal at the peak of their ascent. They landed on a rooftop.

“So,” Cadell said, helping the criminal up. “Where do you want to go, the Amazon Rainforest or the Sahara Desert?”

“Huh?” The criminal blinked twice, tears and sweat covering his face. The man seemed to be in his mid fifties and of South Asian descent. Small traces of grey hair were present but Cadell was happy to contribute in speeding up the process. Blue paint squirted off his clothing, terror spiking.

“You heard me. Amazon Rainforest or the Sahara Desert?”

“Please sir. Just send me to the police station! I’ll confess. You don’t have to do this.”

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Cadell sighed. The desperate pleas rivaled his perpetual migraine. “I’m giving you freedom of choice. You should be grateful, you little shit. The last guy was sent to Antarctica!”

Later that night, while patrolling a quiet street in London, Cadell continuously swiped down with a finger, scrolling down the holographic display projected from the Psycho mask. He was reading the manga, Vagabond, a beautiful comic about a legendary samurai called Musashi. In Dimension zero, the story had been binged thousands of times yet, somehow, it never got old.

Apart from the default crimson sky, no hallucinations flared. Inactivity, stagnancy, passiveness, Cadell despised it. Almost more than the Voice whispering various strategies for slaughter.

Cadell froze. An orange dark pool suddenly filled the street he walked on.

A long familiar scream instantly made his eyes narrow.

“Psycho!” The last syllable was extended way too long. “This must be fate!”

Before Cadell could materialise a portal, he found himself avoiding what was probably an attempt at a hug.

It was the wannabe hero. The copycat. With some help from Elijah, Cadell knew her identity.

It was Hazel Montelbello, a 26-year-old woman with a deathwish.

“So, where should we go?” Hazel asked.

“We?”

Even the Voice chuckled before recommending to kill her.

“Come on, my superhero friend. This has to be fate. What are the chances?”

“Go home!” Cadell exploded. “Take off your copycat shitty mask and go home! Actually, give me that thing.” He took off Hazel’s mask and whistled. “Oh…”

A long horrendous scar extended from the bottom of her right eye all the way down to her chin. It was brutal. And Cadell had seen his fair share of scars.

“What happened to your…”

Hazel grinned. “Cheeky. Don’t pretend you don’t know how… 74 stitches if you’re wondering.”

“I’m amazed...”

“Why thank you.”

“No,” Cadell replied. “I’m amazed... at how fucking stupid you are. Why are you here? Didn’t you learn your lesson? Shouldn’t you, I don’t know, be at work or something?”

Hazel pointed at her scar, for some reason still grinning. “Sick leave. Do you really think my scar is amazing? That’s so sweet.” Her excitement was suffocating. Orange paint consumed the whole street, painting parked cars and terraced houses.

“How...” Cadell began, struggling for words. “How are you not dead?”

Hazel folded her arms. “I don’t know. I honestly thought I would be dead by now”

The way the woman nonchalantly spoke of death made the superhero recoiling in disgust. Something told him skydiving wouldn’t have an affect on her.

Cadell closed the holographic display and tapped his foot repeatedly. An awkward silence continued for a good 20 seconds. Then he dived for a portal two metres behind him.”

He soared through the sky, cackling. “See ya! Wouldn’t want to be… ya?”

Hazel hung from his leg.

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