《Big Red Button.》Press number 1765-ish.
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You are not laying on your back, in a room with no air movement.
That’s a relief.
Instead, there’s a big old treasure chest in the corner!

You get up, dust yourself off, and run over to the chest! It doesn’t take long for you to realize it’s locked.
Looking around, you spot a big key ring in the other corner of the room. You walk over, pick it up, and look at it in mild dismay.
There are fifty keys on it.
Wellp, time to get to work!
You put the key in! It does nothing.
You put the key in! It doesn't fit.
This one does nothing, either.
Nope, not the one.
Nope.
Also no.
Ooh, it's close! But not the one.
Nope.
Not this one, either.
Yeah, doesn't fit.
Fits, but doesn't move.
Not this key.
This is not the key you're looking for...
This one wiggles! But it doesn't turn.
Nopity nope.
This one is like, X shaped. It absolutely doesn't fit. It looks cool, though.
No.
Nah.
Yes! This is it! You've found it!
HA! KIDDING!
Got you good, didn't I?
Not this one. I'm debating telling my boss to go get me another latte, it looks like you'll be at this for a while.
Also not the key.
Deff not the key.
Nope. Doesn't fit.
This one was, at one point, painted blue. Cool.
Not the key you need, tho.
See, I could just be writing "no" for each key, and have there be like eight hundred of them, just to pad my word count, but I'm not. Instead, I'm trying to not repeat anything in my telling of you that the key you choose is, in fact, the wrong one. Like this one. It's the wrong one.
Also the wrong key.
Have you seen that show on Netflix, I think it was called "Locke and Key", where there were a bunch of different keys that did a bunch of different things? It was pretty cool. Had a bunch of old fashioned keys in it. Some kinda looked lilke these keys.
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These keys aren't magical, though. And this key doesn't open the chest.
Yawn. Nope.
This isn't it.
Negative.
Saying "no" is boring. I'll just go through Google Translate and use various forms of "no" from different languages. Should be fun. To start off with, Nahīṁ.
Na.
Neyn.
Cha.
Le.
Kāo
Geen.
Tsis yog.
Net.
Chan eil.
Rara.
Hayi.
THIS IS IT! IT FITS! I'M NOT EVEN JOKING THIS TIME!
You stick the key in, expecting me to say "no" in, idk Hawaiian or something, but I don't! Instead, the key turns! There's an audible click, and the lid cracks open!
You push it open all the way, and see a pile of gold coins!
Cool!
You run your fingers through them, feeling the smooth coldness of the metal. They're super neat looking.
Picking one up, you examine the detail on the engravings. The coins look Spanish. As in, from Spain, not the language. Although the writing on them does look Spanish.
Anyways, you put it- Uhhh. Ok. You put it in your mouth.
Yum? I guess? I don't really know what it would taste like. Why would you do that?
Oh well. I mean, whatever floats your boat...
Aʻole.
Bo.
Enough with the languages. Going back to saying "no" in plain old English.
Nope, not this one.
Heh, yeah, not the right key.
Pfft, admit it, you thought it would be the last one, didn't you? You skipped over all the keys, and tried this one.
Well guess what, dude, it's not this one. You're gonna have to try every single key. And no, it's not the twenty fifth key, either. Probably. Honestly I don't know, but I highly doubt it.
Anyways, have fun!
Wellp. That took forever.
Ready to move on?
DO YOU PRESS THE BUTTON? Yes No
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