Chapter Eighteen - Finding Solutions

Dreamer bounced on the seat across from Abigail.

It was night time, so the cafe was closed. They only had a few lights on, and there was a sign on the door that read ‘Open,’ but only from the inside because the other side said the opposite. So, it was just Dreamer and Abigail, and one of Dreamer’s clones who was in the corner being quiet.

Dreamer figured she’d get rid of that clone later, since they didn’t need to hand people pamphlets anymore, but for now it was time to spend special time with Abigail.

“Okay,” Abigail said. “You understand what we’re doing, right?”

Dreamer nodded. “Yes,” she said.

“And that is...” Abigail said.

Dreamer thought for just a moment. “You’re going to show me a thing with a situation on it, and then I’ll tell you how I’ll react.”

“That’s right,” Abigail said. She smiled at Dreamer who smiled back. This was going to be very easy and Dreamer would earn lots of pats. Abigail lifted a stack of cardboard cue cards and straightens them out on the table with a satisfying clunk clunk. “Let’s start?”

Dreamer nodded. She was ready.

“Alright, so let’s see.” Abigail pulled out the first card and read it aloud. “While walking to school someone stops both of us on the side of the road, and insults us.”

Abigail lowered the card and smiled.

Dreamer frowned. She sensed a trap.

“I... uh... tell the person not to do that?” Dreamer asked.

“Yes, good,” Abigail said. “What else?”

“I... hit them with a tentacle?”

Abigail sighed. “No Dreamer. Someone insulting you or me is bad, but it’s a... not so bad thing. It’s like a little bad. And when things are only a little bad, then you need to react with an, uh, appropriate amount of... reaction.” She nodded.

Dreamer considered it, then nodded too. “Okay.” It made sense. Small bad things deserved small bad things in return.

“Alright,” Abigail said. She flipped to another cue card. “While we’re both at the cafe, someone breaks in and, with a knife, demands that I give him everything in the till.”

“Will he pay for all the stuff?” Dreamer asked.

“No, he’s a thief,” Abigail said.

Dreamer nodded. That made sense. “In that case, if he’s going to steal from us, then I’ll steal their life from them.”

Abigail shook her head. “While defending the shop and us is okay, that doesn’t mean that you can do a crime in return.”

“Oh,” Dreamer said. “In that case, I’ll just tentacle them.”

“Tentacle them?” Abigail asked.

“With a knife tentacle?” Dreamer added.

“No dreamer, that would kill them,” Abigail said.

Dreamer pouted. “I could knife tentacle them softly.”

“I don’t think that’s entirely a, uh, good idea either. People die when they’re stabbed, and the, ah, gentleness of the stabbing doesn’t change things much.” Abigail shook her head. “No, that’s another very violent response to things.”

“This is hard,” Dreamer said.

“You’ll get the hang of it. We’ll work on it together. Look, this one is easy.” Abigail cleared her throat. “You and I are heading over to Daphne’s for an important event, when we realize that we’re almost late. It’s going to take ten minutes to arrive, and we only have five minutes left. What do we do?”

Dreamer tilted her head to one side, then the other. There wasn’t anyone to tentacle in this one, so the problem was a little more complicated. “We’re going to be late?”

“Yes,” Abigail said. “In fact, that’s not a wrong answer. It’s okay to be late sometimes, even if it’s not very polite. Life happens.”

Dreamer nodded, happy that she’d gotten one right, even though it was by accident. “Good. I had another solution too, but if that one works it’s good.”

“What was the other solution?” Abigail asked.

“To stop time so that we wouldn’t be late.”

“Ah,” Abigail said.

“With tentacles.” She made grabby gestures in the air behind her. “Just grab onto time and tell it to stop moving for a little.”

“I think, maybe, we should keep violations of causality to a minimum.”

“Okay,” Dreamer said. Yet another thing to add to the list. It was growing super long. One day she’d need to talk to Abigail about it. No killing, no eating living things, no tentacling people, no experiments on the planet, and now no breaking causality. “This is too many rules.”

“I... you’re right,” Abigail said.

Dreamer wasn’t expecting that. “I am?” Usually, Dreamer was wrong about stuff in some nebulous, hard to understand way.

Abigail set the cue cards on the table, and out of curiosity, Dreamer peeked at it to read the next prompt. Maybe she could get a head start in figuring out the next answer?

We arrive at a restaurant, and there aren’t enough seats for all of us to sit and eat there. Without stealing seats or using tentacles, how do you address the situation?

... How was she supposed to answer that without breaking causality?

Abigail distracted Dreamer by coming around the table and squatting next to her. She smiled, then raised her arms for a hug that Dreamer eagerly fell into. It was a very nice hug, because it was a hug that Dreamer had both earned for doing hard work, and also because Abigail pat Dreamer’s head at the same time.

“I’m sorry,” Abigail said. “I’m asking a lot of you, aren’t I? I feel like I do that a lot. You’re you, and I’m me, and I think there are some big big differences in how we see things.”

That was true. Dreamer had a lot more eyes than Abigail.

“So, sometimes we might not see things the same way, but I still love you, no matter what,” Abigail said. “And I’m sorry.”

Dreamer tucked her head into the crook of Abigail’s neck. “It’s okay. I’m not a mortal-person, and you’re very confusing, but you give good pats and hugs, so I’ll try to do better to keep getting those.”

Abigail laughed. “Well, at least you’re honest.”

***