Introspection

Many hours had passed in the Nest since Maath had started narrating her story; her massive leg never moving away from the vibrating wire as the words filled the silence of her halls.

The open-mouthed biomancer stared wordlessly at the Queen of Spear Spiders while she finished her tale.

“When I came back to my senses, the splinter had been removed and the wound closed. My daughters had also dragged me away from the cavern. During the Anathema’s attack our colony lost more than half of its ◻︎□︎◻︎□︎●︎♋︎⌘︎♓︎□︎■︎♏︎. The few injured died before we could even move away from it. I’m the only one remaining whose blood has been tainted.”

“And what about Chillushrith? You said she was hit! And the lair? What did you do with it? It could still be infected! How often do these portals open? Maybe I’ll be able to go back home?”

Alice rose to her feet, her legs taking her on a confusing journey around the clearing as she wildly gesticulated and asked question after question.

“Also what the actual heck? The Anathema must have been fricking huge if it could boss you around. Launch Chillushrith? In the air? She must weigh more than ten tons!” she exclaimed.

“Yes. It was more than nine times your height. And thankfully my daughter’s flesh was not tainted. The Anathema’s tendrils were weaker than her armor. We left the cave a few feedings later, after I had regained my powers and sealed it off using most of the metal contained within. This Nest was only found later when my heart felt its call. It is weaker, but my presence has strengthened and changed it over time.” Maath replied, her arm slightly faltering for the first time as a discordant note broke the harmony of words.

“The tears open rarely, maybe once every few molts, but we don’t find them often anymore. Only when they are in our territory, which is now dwindling. Our power is still not enough to fight back. Now, however, I wish to rest my legs. You may tell me about your world.” She finally said, the sharp limb now leaving the silken thread and dropping onto the massive cushion with a soft thud.

Alice’s mind was still trying to process all the information it had been given, her excitement forcing her to keep moving around, unable to stand still.

“I… yes. I will do it.” she finally relented, forcing herself back to the futon, the five remaining eyes of the Queen staring at her.

“My world is called Earth and it’s quite different than this one. We don’t have magic for example and mine is the dominant species and it has been for quite some time.” Alice started explaining.

The more she went on, the more relaxed she became as she recounted the many things she had seen, studied or heard about.

For the rest of the day, a long and very confusing tale took place in front of the Spider Queen.

Unknown geographical landmarks and semi-correct historical deviations washed over the titanic arachnid as Alice went from the birth of the human race all the way to the present times she had been able to live in and witness. It was by no means a complete, or even correct, recounting of the world, further complicated by the Queen’s insatiable curiosity of the things she didn’t know.

Despite her own doubts and the spider’s questions, Alice found herself enjoying the memories it evoked, happy to relish in something she had almost started forgetting in the time spent in that new and unforgiving world.

“And you live in huge stone and metal structures? Taller than the tallest cave?” Maath had asked disbelievingly.

“Well yes, some of us. Mine was maybe a bit more than twice your height? But there are floors and many of us live inside of it.” she tentatively replied as she eyed the dozens of Thinkers that had slowly streamed into the cave during her speech, each one silently staring at her as she talked to the perplexed matriarch.

“And you don’t hunt. You create preys?” even through the silken wire her words sounded skeptical.

“Well yes. I told you. You give them food and then make them breed and only eat some of them while the others keep breeding and multiplying. It’s also easier when the things you eat don’t try to kill you every time.” she said while only muttering the last part.

“but where do you take the prey for the prey?” Maath seemed particularly confused by that concept.

“The animals we consume don’t eat meat. They eat plants, vegetation which need sun, and water, and dirt. It’s easier.” She shrugged, suddenly pensive.

“The closest thing here is the glowing mold or mushrooms. You don’t have enough light you see…” she tried to explain until the Queen suddenly clicked in understanding.

“Ah yes. Light. I know of places with light and the green things you talk about. Unpleasant, however. And dangerous” the matriarch mused, her eyes briefly landing on the now gleaming and eight-legged form of Chillushrith before turning back to the surprised human girl.

“What? Really? Where? Can you show me? Tell me please!” she begged, her mind already thinking at the chance of a way out, of sun and something different than meat.

Maath, however, quickly squashed those hopeful thoughts.

“I will. Later. I promise. I told you my story, I now wish to know more about yours. What do you do if you don’t hunt to eat?”

Alice scowled and tried to push for some answers but, in the end, she relented.

I have time after all. She thought, and I do miss home so talking about it is nice sometimes.

“Well… we don’t have a colony, not in a real sense.” She tried, her brain working to find a way to describe something so alien to the Queen.

“We are too many for a single colony. It doesn’t work. We have a thing called society which is both similar and different. A person works for itself and for a small number of people close to them, but a society has uncountable more members that don’t really know each other but follow the same rules that make everything work. It doesn’t really work but we try.” She chuckled.

I won’t even talk about theft and corruption and the rest since I don’t even know if she would understand it. she decided.

“A person does a job that is useful for many members of the society and in exchange has access to things created by other people. A job could be producing food, transporting it, preparing it for other people or even cleaning up after people have eaten” She explained, really trying to simplify the issue.

The Spider Queen clicked a few times, the cluster of Thinkers in the glade instantly replying in a cacophony of clicks and hisses.

“It seems… complicated, but if you say that humans are so many I can understand. But what was your role in this society? Were you a healer?” Maath asked curiously.

Alice chuckled at the thought, her mind going back to the time she had actually wanted to be a doctor.

“Oh no. Definitely not.” She finally replied “I was a student. I was still learning to become a real member of the society and I wanted to become a translator. Earth has many languages, you know, and not everyone speaks them all. My work would have been to connect some of those people —or their knowledge at least. It’s difficult to explain but it’s the same thing we have managed to do here. We understand each other now.” she smiled, thinking back at the weeks-long process of signing and translating the complicated language of the Queen.

Still better than all those damned articles I had to translate as training. Even if some of them have been somewhat useful. I’m fairly sure the professor was just giving us some of her work.

As Alice reminisced her past, Maath silently stared at the young woman for a few minutes, seemingly pensive as she cleaned her palps against each other.

“Your world is strange, Alice, more complex than the one I know. I thank you for the knowledge. I will answer more of your questions after I rest. Eisor and the others will be here if you need anything.” She finally said before retreating into her hollow without another word, the wire now lax and abandoned on the ground.

Alice stood up, a yawn escaping her mouth as the many hours of tiring narration and conversation suddenly started weighing down on her. She wasn’t sure how much time she had spent awake but her mind was running on fumes.

As she walked to her newly rebuilt tent, courtesy of Ozren once again, her eyes travelled to the glowing pool of Lumen glimmers and to the few remaining test subject still kept alive in the clearing.

“I guess it’s time to restart with the experiments.” She murmured, “I really wish there was a better way to do what I’m trying to do.” She said before yawning again.

She dropped on the soft silk like a sack of potatoes and a few seconds later she was asleep.

“Why do you keep dying?” The exasperated shout echoed through the clearing as Alice threw away the remains of a slowly dissolving slug, its body eaten from the inside out by a mass of Lumen glimmers.

It was the fifth time she had tried to replicate the results of her tests on Specimen G, the evolved screechling she had created a few weeks ago, and every single time, despite her efforts in healing them, her test subjects kept dying.

Alice had used the glimmers on multiple slugs and a couple of Rock Crabs, but they had all died in her hands. Despite her efforts, she had been unable to repair all the damage their body was doing to itself in an effort to fight back the luminescent particles; the cells simply too overwhelmed to actually respond to her orders.

The girl tried to calm herself by closing her eyes and taking a few deep breaths, her now slimy hand clenching and unclenching as she slowly breathed in and out.

When she felt a bit more centered, Alice knelt on the ground and grabbed the fist-sized carcass before lowering it in the large metal bowl that housed the Lumen particles.

As the uncountable specks of light started eagerly consuming the rest of the body, she tried to find a difference between the previous experiment and the new ones.

Let’s reason. The screechling evolved after I kept healing it, it took quite a long time, but in the end it managed to survive, what is different here? The subjects’ body seems to completely reject the glimmers. It seems to be the same reaction my body had, but in the end I managed to circumvent it, they didn’t.

Is it because they are simpler creatures and they can’t get a core?

Nah. Not really since I did see those big-ass jellyfish which are basically water in a shopping bag and even those had heat powers, hence they must have had a core.

Also the crabs are crustaceans so not super different from the spiders, just a couple more legs.

Maybe the way the Lumen create a core is different from the normal one? It sure doesn’t take long but maybe is more violent in exchange? It’s a possibility.

When her last remaining guinea pig had been completely broken down by the glimmers, a grouchy Alice stomped over to Qhevi; the squat tarantula having just dragged another meal for the recently-awakened Queen.

As she stared at the few large bundles laying on the floor in front of her, an explanation started taking form in her mind.

“Qhevi can you show me today’s meal? I might need to get one of those.” She signed before turning towards Chillushrith, the large spider still in the process of hardening her new exoskeleton.

“I’m also gonna need you. This might get dangerous.” She told the approaching Thinker, her thick frontal limbs gradually warping into sickles as she walked closer.

Alice turned her attention back on the bundles, scouring their contents for a suitable specimen. She instantly moved away from the massive centipede covered in broken quills and from the deformed ant whose bright yellow mandibles promised a very bad time to anyone that got bit.

She finally stopped in front of the third cocoon, staring at the paralyzed creature contained within.

“This will do.” She muttered before turning towards the matriarch, already busy with her meal.

“I’m sorry Maath but I need this one. Also I think you should try to eat a bit less. It might help fight the infection.” She told her, thinking back at the infected specimens’ reactions to food.

“I understand Alice. It is difficult to do but I will try. What are you going to do with that creature?” the Queen asked as she finished consuming the ant.

“The Lumen give a magical core to the creatures that eat them; some of them at least. Sometimes the body doesn’t seem able to sustain the change and I think I might know why. There are two options but one doesn’t really make sense.” She replied, as she walked towards the glowing metal bowl.

“Would this Lumen work on my kindred?” the Queen suddenly asked, an edge appearing in the words coming from the silken thread.

Alice stopped, trying to ignore the small shiver running down her spine.

This is it then. The final trial.

“I… don’t know.” She honestly replied, “So far, almost everything that has come into contact with the Lumen has died. The only survivors were me and two other creatures. I think it might work but I’ll need to do more experiments. It might be dangerous.” she concluded.

“I see.” Maath finally said as she carefully cleaned her massive palps, ignoring the rest of the convoy of food.

A few minutes later the preparations had been completed, the creature bound to the ground in proximity of the Lumen bowl and restrained with a large amount of silk that only left its head and sides uncovered.

Alice used the carapace of one of the previous Rock Crabs to carefully spoon a good amount of concentrated Lumen specks down the gullet of the man-sized, hairless mole-rat, her hand staying as far away as possible from the four bone-white incisor that curved out of its maw.

As soon as the last of the glimmers had disappeared down its throat, the young woman moved around the creature until she was on its side, sparing a few glances to its clawed hands and feet to make sure she would not be within their reach were the creature to stir awake.

Taking great care to keep a good distance from the few long and wiry whiskers that sprouted from the mammal’s otherwise hairless skin, Alice placed her hands on the oily and leathery flank of the sightless mole, her biomantic powers pushing through the hide with barely any resistance and entering its system.

The biomancer ignored the somewhat familiar organs of the animal and immediately moved to its digestive tract, using her connection to the glimmers to locate their position.

The Lumen were already traveling down the esophagus, leaving behind them a glowing trails of mutated cells as they followed the path of least resistance towards the stomach.

Just to make sure she hadn’t been wrong before, Alice focused on the way the glimmers interacted with the mole-rat system. As she had seen in her own body, each time one of the particles hit a normal cell, the round orb of living light broke apart, liberating a shower of even smaller specks that melded into the cellular wall and turned it into something different.

At the same time, however, she could feel the almost immediate reaction of the creature’s immune system. As soon as a cell was turned, in fact, the leucocytes around it would immediately release a huge cloud of digestive enzymes and antibodies to fight off the perceived infection. Small wounds and inflamed patches had already started appearing in the mutated tissue.

It’s the same thing that happened to me. she thought as she ignored the first few casualties, instead forcing the rest of the glimmers straight into the creature’s stomach where she ordered them to consume its contents.

As she watched the glimmer eat and multiply, an idea came to her mind.

What if, instead of turning off the immune system as before, I directed the glimmers to first meld with it?

Following her sudden hunch, the girl started searching throughout the body until, with the help of her Biomagical Instincts, she finally found the primary factory of all the white and red blood cells.

Under Alice’s enraptured gaze, the spongy marrow contained within the creature’s bones constantly spewed out a huge stream of leucocytes and erythrocytes that soon entered the complex circulatory system of the mole-rat through a series of small blood vessels contained within the bone itself.

Gotcha. She finally smiled as her powers started leading the more than doubled Lumens towards the closest vein.

The untiring particles launched themselves into the intestinal tract and, from there, gently oozed into the circulatory system, taking the place of water and nutrients as they soaked veins and arteries with their glow.

Once the circulatory system had been breached, reaching the entirety of the body was only a matter of time.

Alice rushed the glimmers along with the blood through veins and arteries until, after a few long minutes of turning and twisting, she finally found herself inside the sternum and ribs of the creature, watching the Lumen target first the infant leucocytes and then the marrow itself.

All in all, it took her one more hour to completely take over the entire skeletal structure of the creature but, in the end, she watched with glee as each newborn cell was formed already mutated, gently spreading its glow throughout the body.

The violent reaction of the mole-rat’s immune system slowly subsumed as Alice directed the few remaining glimmers in a ruthless hunt for the remaining uncorrupted particles, casually using a few Hemostasis to knit back the many small injuries caused by the dying resistance to the bright green wave that was quickly sweeping through the body.

Only once the last pockets of dissidents had been thoroughly destroyed, did Alice’s consciousness move back to her own system.

Ignoring the small headache in the back of her head, the biomancer quickly ran back to the Lumen bowl and used her control to congeal more of the particles before ramming them down the creature’s throat.

“Now we wait.” She finally said as she sat down on the ground, her back against the side of the creature as its body finally surrendered to the invasion.

In the next few hours, Alice felt the glimmers slowly propagate through the body of the monster, fusing with its cells, tissues and organs. Sometimes the take-over was gentle, almost imperceptible even for her, other times, the body of the mole-rat was wracked by shivers and tremors that broke through the paralysis and forced her to ask Skitter or Chillushrith to further sedate it.

In the meanwhile, the young woman started thinking.

“You know, what I’m doing could be seen as quite horrible on Earth. At least by a lot of people” she said to the Queen, trying to ignore another convulsion of the creature’s body.

Maath stirred, her leg landing on the tense, silvery thread as she turned to watch her.

“Why? It is prey. It would be eaten anyway. Why not make use of it?” she asked clicking in confusion.

“Because people have things called morals, which is basically what they think makes them good or bad. Most of us think that making other people or animals suffer without a reason is wrong. Sometimes you have to do it, obviously, but you should feel bad about it I think. At least a little bit.” She finally muttered, still loud enough for the spider to hear.

“Do you feel bad about this prey?”

Despite waiting for that question, Alice still averted her eyes and bit her lip before finally answering.

“No. That’s the problem.” She stated, her only hand clenched tightly in a fist, “I used to feel bad before, you know? Even when that fucking screechling tried to literally make my heart stop with its shrieking. I still thought it was my fault.” She sniffled a bit before continuing.

“Now, however, I don’t really feel anything. I… I feel like I’m losing myself in here sometimes.” She said, closing her eyes for a bit and taking a few more deep breaths before resuming.

“I had a thing at home, it was an object that cleaned the floor but wasn’t really alive. I had given it a name, and if I hit it when walking around I would actually feel bad. An object. Like a rock.” she exclaimed, her hand painfully slamming on the metal floor.

“And now I’m infecting animals with magical mutations and alien mold and watching them die. And I... I don’t really care about it.” she stammered out. Her eyes were dry, she wanted to cry but nothing was coming out.

“Do you know what I thought when it started twitching? That it was annoying.” She finally admitted.

Maath looked at her silently for a long time, as the tiny human at her feet tried to nurse her smarting hand and stared at the ground.

“I do not understand Alice.” The Queen finally said “It is not a member of your colony, of your family as you call it. It is prey that will die. I do not know of good or bad, it is not something that matters in the caves. What matters is living and thriving.” She stated, her carapace completely still, not a ripple in the metal as she talked “I will kill all that menaces myself or the colony, I will sacrifice the life of one to save more. I will not think of the life of something that will die because it does not matter.”

“But I was not like this! I used to care! What does that make me?” the girl shouted back, her voice cracking as her fears finally cracked the barrier she had slowly build around them.

“It will make you live.” Maath replied matter-of-factly.

“You will think of morals, of good and of bad when you will be back into your society. Until then, you will keep doing everything you can to survive. No matter the cost. You will do that, or you will die.”

Alice sat silent for a long time after that, feeling the shivers of the mole-rat on her back.

“I think I want to be alone for a bit” she finally said, trying to stand up on her feet.

Her back had almost broken contact with the warm body of the monstrous rat when something within its system suddenly flared up.

She stopped.

Alice carefully placed her hand back on the greasy pink skin of the monster, her powers instantly soaking into its body. She felt the sharper response of the many newly-mutated cells that had established a secure foothold in the organisms, she sensed their difference from the rest of the unmutated body.

She also felt something new and different flowing into the creature; an undercurrent, not unlike that of her own powers, which flowed from each organ and mutated tissue, dozens of lines of energy that slowly moved towards the chest of the mole-rat.

As time went on, the energy contained within the chest, restless as it was, started calming down, growing thicker and more compact as it seemed to slowly congeal into a single spot between the lungs of the creature and underneath its hammering heart.

The power became more solid, slowly compressing and crystallizing into a small, bean-sized marble which gently vibrated in place, connected to the mole but still separate from it.

Alice’s consciousness slowly moved forward, feeling the resistance increase the closer she got to the newborn core until she was a mere breath away from it. The intruding biomancer could now watch the cold and almost solid energy that still moved towards it, filling it further as time went on.

Ignoring her own instincts, she extended a tiny tendril of her own magical warmth to touch it. A spike of pain entered her brain as soon as her power touched the surface of the core.

A high-pitched screech erupted from the small grey marble and kept drilling into her head until she frantically severed the connection to the creature. She could feel the energy flaring and spilling inside of its system.

In the meanwhile. the monster had somehow fought off the paralysis and was now straining against the bindings. Its massive fangs had grown longer and sharper and it was now using them to try and cut away at the silk.

Skitter had already jumped on its body and sunk its fangs into its flesh but the mole-rat didn’t stop its fight for freedom, too late did Alice see one of the clawed hands of the creature slash through the silk keeping it in place and moving towards her, the talons growing longer each instant.

Before she could even react, she felt a heavy weight land on her ribs, pushing out all the air in her lungs and slamming her back a couple of meters, the claws barely missing her breasts.

She landed on the ground, her entire chest sending massive waves of pain every time she breathed while, in front of her, Chillushrith finally managed to sedate the frenzied creature.

As soon as the mole-rat was still, four thick bands of metal erupted from the ground, completely containing the creature.

Alice tried to sit up, her hand gently touching her ribs as she inspected them for fractures.

“Don’t touch the core” she wheezed, “understood”.

It’s the second time in less than three days that Chillushrith saves me by slamming me away.

She thought.

At least it worked.

*****

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