Moota sighs, “Even if you are a dungeon, what can you provide me I couldn’t get elsewhere? And more cow worshippers is nice but that settlement won’t move the needle.”

Doyle smiles, “I can give you the world! By which I mean I will eventually have floors large enough to count as at least small worlds. At the moment, I am locked down as a goat dungeon. They are my bread and butter. Don’t think that will change either. Had a run in with the concept of goats that locked that in.”

“That however doesn’t stop me from having cows. Now I’m sure the normal dungeon monsters won’t do much for you. They aren’t real. However, a large part of my goats are just off to the side of my floor in pastures. I assume that once my monsters are able to breed, they are real enough to worship. Part of what I want in the first place is cows to add to my dungeon.”

“Like I said, I have goats. At the moment I there is one of my goats set up for adventurers to milk, but I’m going to be honest. In this world, cow milk is what everyone has gotten used to. Plus, you’re an alchemy cow. I’m sure with your blessing and the cows eating herbs I can provide some interesting products.”

Moota shrugs, “I don’t even need to give you actual cows. Once we make the deal, I can dump the pattern for a variety of cows of level five and below into you. In fact, now that I remember that is a possibility, I can do the same with a few higher quality potions. Though by higher quality, I mean mid-ranked and only in a new world like this. In the greater universe they would more qualify as peak of low rank.”

“The difference is because with better techniques and more in depth training, a low rank alchemist can make them. Without those advantages, it takes a more advanced alchemist to brew. I just have them because of how my species works.”

Then Moota frowns, “Though I don’t know if a dungeon monster can worship a god. In theory, it should work once they can breed? I know enough worlds get repopulated by dungeons. A core is one of the more durable species even against world killing events. And at least under the system in this dimension any surviving cores get low level species pushed on them to help with it.”

“I’ve heard that in other dimensions that either have a different system or no system at all, you can find countless worlds overrun by a single species. Without the variety our system provides, that is what happens. You can see it in this dimension, though on moons or similar small stellar bodies. The system just doesn’t feel a need to add variety to those places. Plus all the variety in the heavens won’t help much on a planet so far out there is only ice or so close to a sun the surface is molten.”

Ally claps, “Interesting, but we can’t be here all day to listen. I would like to hear more, so maybe I can get your number. It would be nice to have someone new to talk to.”

Moota smiles, “I’m sure the both of you have enough on your hands out there. A dungeon next to a developing settlement? Things must change on a weekly basis! But yeah, we need to get the details hammered out.”

“To head towards that, let me lay out what potions I can provide. There are healing potions of the three primary specialties. Coagulant, mending, and regeneration. An absolutely silly amount of antidotes for every non-magical poison or venom and even a few minor magical types. Cure disease potions and like the antidotes, there are variants for all non-magical options and a few minor magical diseases. Resistance potions because being able to hold a fire in your hand is a great party trick.”

“Then of course there are all the miscellaneous potions. Want a potion that will hide you from the sense of mindless undead or normal animals? How about a potion that improves your ability to jump or climb a wall? There are an unlimited amount of potential low rank potions out there and I only have a few of them. Though even then a few doesn’t mean a small number of them.”

“My favorites are the oils. Because we brew them in the same way and require the same knowledge, they count as potions. You don’t want to drink them though. A popular one for low level adventurers is the oil of magic weapon. All it does is make your weapon count as being magical for a short while. That way you don’t have to buy a magic weapon. Yet you won’t be screwed when they meet something resistant to normal damage.”

“And of course every single one of those things I just listed has at least five variants. The gods in my coalition weren’t expecting a dungeon. Give those potions to a regular alchemist and they might improve a recipe or two or maybe decipher one of them. You’re just going to deconstruct them all and end up with a range of impossible potions in your dungeon.”

“Goodness, just the antidotes you’ll be able to create alone would make the other gods pull their hair out. Sure most dungeons get that way. Time has a quality all of its own. A dungeon that lives long enough will gather many varieties of the same potion. If only because the surrounding mortals will develop new recipes and forget old ones given enough time.”

Ally holds up a hand to stop her, “Wait a second, impossible potions? If they exist how can they be impossible?”

Moota laughs, “Because of the arrogance of alchemist god association. This is another reason they hate me. I can produce the so-called impossible potions. Not like a dungeon can, but still. Anyway, an impossible potion is any potion they can’t make with their godly powers and isn’t a natural treasure.”

Doyle frowns, “Wouldn’t your milk count as a natural treasure?”

Moota sighs, “It doesn’t count because it can be controlled to an extent. So yeah, they get butt hurt when they can’t reverse engineer a potion with their powers. Dungeons are a major sticking point for them because of this. You cores just combine similar potions into one super potion. Early on, they can still figure it out. After all, combining potions isn’t a new thing. Any of the alchemy gods can combine three to five of them depending on complexity. Dungeons just throw it all together with no limits.”

Ally shrugs, “It makes sense. Dungeon touches on a deeper part of creation than a god can.”

Moota laughs at this, “Everyone knows that, but it doesn’t mean they need to like it. At the very least, those in charge of the coalition believe they should have complete control over everything related to potions. Impossible potions aren’t under their purview and that sticks in their craw.”

Doyle nods, “I can see that. If the stories my world has about gods are anywhere near true, then most of them are delusional about their own power.

Rolling her eyes, Moota sighs, “I wish I could tell you something different. Sadly, gods tend to get an inflated sense of self worth and I don’t see how you can prevent it. After all, they get their godhood through being worshipped. Me becoming a god almost by accident is a very rare thing now, even on worlds like mine.”

“To become a god you need a few things. First, you need someone who has reached as high as they can. If a person can continue to gain power, why would they bother with the normal people? Some of them believe they reached the peak of what a mortal can do. Others believe they have reached some personal limit, a self-fulfilling prophecy if there ever was one.”

“Anyway, after that you need a person able to market themselves. This needs a specific type of person. The classic quiet scholar who has shut themselves away from the world to study won’t become a god, or at least they won’t on their own.”

“So that means you get people with a glib tongue and that thinks they reached the peak of mortal ability. They spread their names and with some time it proves their delusions as it raises them to godhood and the secrets of their craft are further opened to them.”

Ally fake gags, “Yeah, most gods are like the one guy back in the tutorial. The guy you called a jock. It is what you get when power is gained from popularity instead of actual ability. They aren’t even that good at the whole popularity thing. The people who train in social skills tend not to be so obvious about it.”

Moota shakes her head, “Eh, even with that you get the slimeballs.”

Doyle rubs the bridge of his nose. “Okay, while it is interesting to listen to how much of a slimeball most gods are, once again can we get this done in a timely fashion? You both are going to share contact info. That means as much girl talk as you can stomach.”

Ally looks annoyed at his interruption but Moota nods and gets back on track, “Anyway, I’ve laid out the basic potions I can provide. Now for some of my specialties. These aren’t quite impossible potions, but they are my own special make. I can give you three of them because of some binding promises I made when joining my coalition.”

“The first is a coagulant. What is special about it is that it also combines the effect of nulling most outside influences that would prevent it working. Get cursed so your wound bleeds forever? Have a poison that thins the blood? Struck by a weapon that prevents healing? My potion can cure what ails you and stop the bleeding dead. Of course this isn’t perfect. With enough power, the bleeding effect will keep it at bay. But more importantly, it won’t be able to fix things that aren’t on the bleeding person. For example, if there’s a magical effect on the land that causes wounds to bleed more, my potion will only be as effective as a normal coagulant.”

“The next potion comes from my earliest days. The people of my world would feed me the closest thing to magical herbs to me, whatever they may be. This resulted in a so-called cure all. Take all the most common tribal medicines and pack it into one potion after cutting the effectiveness in half. The other gods jokingly call it the minor cure all, and I’ve rolled with it. Cheap to make and it will take care of things like the common cold and minor aches and pain. I’ve found healers love it because the potion lets them focus their healing magic on those with actual problems.”

“Finally, I have a real oddball potion. Once again popular with healers, but it is not cheap to make. It uses some ingredients that are very much illegal in almost every world. What it does is solve a problem all low level healing spells have. The problem that once a wound has healed your body can lock in the new body state. Break an arm and have it heal crooked? You’re going to need to get someone powerful to heal it.”

“My potion goes in and dissolves the area that has healed wrong, while resetting your body’s image of itself. This means it will heal scars and fix that crooked arm I talked about. I haven’t ever given this potion to the coalition. Thank goodness the old fools want to keep their own secrets, so don’t require anyone to divulge their own.”

“Of course, such a nifty potion doesn’t come without downside. If a person has gotten any voluntary modifications, those will also dissolve away. I’ve called it the pauper’s fix. After all, not only would a person with money be able to afford healing in the first place, but they are also the ones most likely to be modified.”