《There is no Epic Loot here, Only Puns.》12: The Nature of Give and Take
Advertisement
Delta watched as the two people eyed the dungeon further in and talked quietly to themselves. Quiss had snagged a few of her Lumen Mushrooms from the Pond Cave.
“Eager people die first. We did two rooms; let’s not get greedy and run into something we might not be prepared for,” Ruli said finally and Quiss rolled his tongue against his teeth. He finally nodded after a moment.
“You’re the expert,” Quiss said and Ruli raised one eyebrow doubtfully. She crossed her arms and tapped her knife out of what seemed like a habit.
“Quiss Firesmasher, the man who burned a dragon to death? Right… sure, let me be the expert,” Ruli shrugged and Quiss actually looked annoyed at the comment.
“You know full well that we don’t discuss the past, not mine, not yours, not anyone's,” he warned and Ruli scowled.
“Right… let’s all pretend we can just do that,” she said and pushed past the blond man. Delta was unable to look away from the scene.
Burn a dragon? Talking about the past?
Delta felt like the minor background character compared to these two. Wasn’t she the big new dungeon corey thing? Who were these two?
Ruli and Quiss navigated back to the entrance and Delta felt a twinge of panic. Her human contact was vanishing! Delta was ready to send Francois after them but they both stopped just before the entrance.
“I always feel like an idiot when doing this,” Quiss said aloud and Ruli glared at him.
“Don’t disrespect tradition. Manners never hurt anyone but your ego,” she replied and both of them put an arm across their chest and bowed their heads a little.
“Thank you for the adventure,” they both said, Ruli was louder and clear but Quiss mumbled it.
Delta felt… warm. She didn’t feel any mana rise or DP appear. This was an entirely human emotion. Relief.
Didn't they think she was evil? Quiss wasn’t cursing her existence? Ruli wasn’t spitting at her? Delta wanted to shake their hands or bow back or something!
Delta shivered and from the depths of her dungeon, a warm breeze floated past Quiss and Ruli.
Ruli beamed like she had just been proven right and Quiss scowled harder.
“I think that felt like… acceptance? Appreciation? Hmm… felt like I was right?” Ruli mused and Quiss waved her off.
“It was goblin gas, hot air and superstition,” he turned and walked out. Ruli rolled her red eyes and then peered down the tunnel of Delta’s dungeon.
“Ignore him… you’re pretty decent for a new dungeon. Keep up the good work,” Ruli saluted casually and followed Quiss out through the white barrier. Delta stared at the space.
“Don’t… leave me,” she whispered but they didn’t reappear. Delta must have spent some time just waiting because Hob and Gob appeared sometime later with two buckets filled with things.
“We return, Master!” Hob called and began to empty his bucket. Delta squished her feeling of human isolation down into a tiny hole and attempted to sound cheerful as she inspected the items.
Well… the gobs had gone far it seemed. Even got some interesting new things.
Wyin Tree acorn absorbed!
Rabbit corpse absorbed!
Qarn Swallow egg absorbed!
Black Brambles absorbed!
Old Rope has been absorbed!
Delta rubbed her hands with delight, watching her mana skyrocket.
Having Quiss and Ruli in her dungeon has been enough to push her to mana of 30. These items easily hit 50.
Her max mana with her new rooms on top of her base mana? 55. Delta was slowly but surely surpassing her limits!
Advertisement
Gob shook his bucket and a few tiny black things fell to the ground, they wriggled and burst open. Tiny spiders the size of pennies scuttled about and they all tried to head towards the entrance. Hob growled and stomped one.
Black Forest Spider hatchling absorbed! Upgrades for the Common Spiders have been unlocked!
Hob grumbled as his foot was now covered in green slime. Gob tried to get another but they moved quickly, hissing in harmony at the goblins. Delta blinked, surprised by the angry emotions of the spiders as they escaped.
“Where did you find them?” she asked and Hob looked puzzled.
“Giants webs, thoughts they were berries, not eggs!” he promised and Delta stared at the exit where the hatchlings had scampered out. The babies were about the size of most spiders in her old world.
Delta just had to wonder how big the adults were…and how the heck the two gobs were able to take their egg sacks away so easily.
Were her two gobs that skilled? Or just… lucky?
Feeling uneasy, she hurried to take her now decreasing 65 mana and continued to shake her dungeon about, happy to see her menus had returned.
She moved her Mushroom Grove into a new place. If she was going to be known as a frigging Mushroom Forest, then the people might as well see her grove. She placed it after the mud room and made it so people would have to pass through the grove to reach the goblin camp.
Then she spawned another room between the grove and the goblin camp. As soon as she did so, a menu popped up with a little message.
A max of 5 rooms have been reached. Excluding special rooms, level 1 cannot hold any more core-created rooms.
Delta felt a little… sad. A room limit per floor? It made sense that the first floor of the dungeon was the smallest and easiest in terms of difficulty, but what about end game dungeons? Their first floors were massive!
Well, Delta was pretty sure there was no end game here other than time passing so she guessed it was fair that all dungeons had the same rough floor space. Maybe some dungeons could bypass this limit and Delta wondered if she could down the line.
For now… she took that uneasy feeling of the escaping spiders and channelled it into something she should have done a while ago.
Upgrading.
First was the case of her dead Mushy. It was ash and there was no healing from that. It was going to be super annoying, Delta decided, that if she had to personally respawn every trap and monster each time someone came through.
“No… there has to be a trick,” she decided and flicked through her monster menu, not finding a respawn option. So she tried the construction and rooms.
She found some odd things like she could move things in the room without much cost or how she could attach a sound to a particular room?
Delta had no idea how to make a sound that could be attachable, so she moved on.
Finally, she found something in the goblin camp menu. The formerly ‘Lair’ of her floor.
Lair:
Remove Goblin Camp upgrade Set monster Respawn list (5 monsters for level 1): 5 DP per monster added. Set monster respawn rank (rare): (three rare monsters for level 1) 10 DP per rare monster added. Monster respawn for contracted monsters: 100 DP per respawn.
Delta felt a little like her eyes might have popped out at the cost to bring back Hob or Gob. If one or, she cringed at the idea, both of them got killed then Delta would be very poor, but very relieved at being able to summon them back.
Advertisement
Delta just decided to not have them die if she could help it.
Still, this menu was the key to everything and she felt a little sheepish that she didn’t question why a Lair was something she could build from the very start. Boss room… self-explanatory, Lair?
A space that respawns her monsters to avoid her, the Core, from micromanaging the whole process. Delta liked it, she liked it a lot.
Considering she had 121 DP points… Delta just wiggled her fingers and filled the slots. Francois and her single Mushy would now respawn roughly around where they died, she hoped. With 45 mana kicking, she created another Mushy… beyond the mudroom and out of the way of the Pond room.
She checked her menus and was pleasantly surprised as she checked the bats and spiders. They did have a respawn feature naturally. Her spiders would take an hour to fully reappear and don't seem to count for her total monster count.
Delta guessed it was because they weren’t really… monsters, just local wildlife imitations. So, she could still add bats if she wanted.
Instead, she created another two goblins, bringing her mana down to 7Theey pair appeared and looked almost exactly the same but one had a little snaggle tooth.
“Welcome to the dungeon,” Delta greeted and both goblins bowed their heads as Hob eyed them, his height making him appear more dangerous than her new gobs. Delta decided she would save the Crayclaws for another level. She wanted her fishing pond to be blood-free.
A place of peace, her little paradise.
Delta registered her new Mushy and Goblins to the lair and it alerted to being unable to respawn any further monsters.
Delta giggled as the goblins chased each other around the dungeon. It was good to have noise in the dungeon that wasn’t mushrooms bursting through soil or spiders hissing at one another.
Speaking of…
Delta sat down and began to browse her menus, eager to see what upgrades she could mess around with now.
---
“I declare the new dungeon to be of fit quality and not of the forbidden type. I also state the dungeon seems very cooperative and even bade us farewell, if legends are to be believed. I further state that we, the town of Durence, may benefit from the resources the dungeon may create,” Quiss said to Elder Pic. Ruli grinned.
“Place was pretty cool,” she added her endless wisdom to Quiss’ report. Pic eyed them, one eye rolling back to go to sleep and the other staring through them as if seeing something not quite of this world.
“Nature eh? A little common but that’s not a bad thing. Mushrooms are interesting. Do you think it will develop in ways to suggest a plague? Gutrots aren’t the most friendly of things and we all know what happens if they catch fire,” he said with a low grumble. Old Lady Jose frowned.
“Dungeon creations may not act the same. It doesn't matter until Seath is done examining them. As the head of ‘Pesky Pests and Disastrous Biology’ he will be able to tell us soon,” she said and Quiss wondered how wise it was to have a man in charge of both benign threats and life ending threats?
A pixie nest did not require Infernal fire from the 67th layer of Abyss but Seath very much used the stuff to do everything from cooking toast to murdering infectious Shadow Beasts. Seath was a very basic man with very little inclination towards learning the meaning of moderation.
“He’ll most likely just suggest fire to be safe,” Quiss pointed out and Jose sighed.
“His cliff notes will be enough. I’ll warn people to use magic lights or crystal lightning lamps. I do not want to cause another Gutrot burning,” she agreed. Pic slid his false teeth about, Quiss idly noted he was using his set made from meteor ore today. Good against scales and ghosts.
“So… what do we tell the king?” Ruli asked casually and the room went quiet.
“We must report a dungeon. Due to the way they inherently increase a kingdom’s wealth, it’d be a crime to do otherwise. However, as soon as we do. The Fairplay company will come, the Guilds will come, the Merchants will come, and…” Jose looked visibly pained by her next words.
“The teenagers with their backstories will come,” she managed and Pic’s teeth fell out of his mouth. Quiss shuddered as Ruli grimaced.
Quiss eyed the report on the desk in front of Jose, one word and it would be ash…
“Well… sadly we can do nothing, the message will arrive when it arrives,” Pic said after putting his teeth back in. Jose hummed.
“Due to our town being so small, we do not have any royal transports or messengers. Our only Peace Keeper just happens to be our only active mage capable of making the journey to the capital and I cannot in good mind risk sending him away. Our monster hunter must guard the dungeon… oh dear, I guess we’ll just have to wait for the next tax collection to pass the message on,” Jose sighed and sipped at a flask.
Ruli was smiling but spoke with a serious tone.
“Would our mage not be able to magic the letter to the capital?” she wondered and Pic smiled.
“Mail via magical means was outlawed,” he informed her. Quiss blinked at him owlishly.
“When?” he asked, outraged. Jose and Pic shared a look.
“Just now.” they both agreed. Quiss stared at them. He cleared his throat and took on a very polite tone.
“What about receiving magical mail?” he asked, his ‘Mad Mage Monthly’ was coming soon. Also his ‘Wicked Witches’ but they didn’t need to know about that.
Jose shrugged.
“Can’t be blamed if someone sends you mail. I myself is waiting on my ‘Hunter’s Digest’ and my calendar to support the cause of failing Knight education. I payed for it after all! Before the law took hold, of course,” Jose nodded. Ruli looked even more wicked as she agreed.
“Not because the calendar has the knights appearing increasingly scantily clad for the viewer each month?” she asked and Jose just gave them both a look that told them that the meeting was over.
Quiss turned without a word, not wanting to wait for Pic to reveal his monthly pleasures.
“Quiss?” Pic called and Quiss’ mentally screamed.
“If this dungeon has any good materials… let me know? I need some new chompers soon… I’ve pushed all my good sets beyond their breaking point,” Pic sighed.
Quiss felt both relieved and concerned. Pic without protective dentures was a problem. He had real teeth, Pic brushed religiously, everyone knew that.
No, the problem was the the man used to be known as Pic ‘The Demon Eater’.
The name was pretty clear in what Pic used to do. Having his teeth exposed might be trouble as Pic chewed on everything without thinking. Quiss himself had lost a 1st edition on heat spells for cooking during a visit from Pic once.
“Yes, Elder Pic,” Quiss bowed his head and left before Jose dropped a fetch quest on his head or worse, an escort request.
Quiss would rather spontaneously combust before he ever did one of those again.
---
Delta smiled as she read over her menus.
Items Purchase:
Rabbit Haunch: 7 DP
The brambles hasn’t unlocked a new trap by itself. It had said a upgrade has been unlocked for the tripwire trap, however. And brambles by themselves made for a good obstacle.
Trap Purchase:
Sticky Floor Panel: 9 DP Weak Tripwire: 5 DP (Upgrade unlocked upon purchase) Falling Rock (Weak): 10 DP/ 10 Mana Flame Gout trap: 8 DP Stake trap: 10 DP (covered sharpened sticks designed to ruin boots and hurt feet)
The acorn was interesting. It seemed to be added it to the construction menu under a new option.
Construction Purchase:
Moss: 5 DP Brambles: 5 DP Small Wyin Sapling: 15 DP
Delta was starting to get excited when things cost a little more than normal. Delta didn’t know what or why the sapling cost so much but she imagined a tree overlooking her pond and didn’t think twice before she bought it.
With havin it purchased, Delta felt a light bulb click on as she remembered she could… get more information on things before she purchased them.
Thankful that no one knew about little slip up, Delta held her finger on the menu.
Small Wyin Sapling: A rare plant that grows in forests. Over time it may become a tree. It is notoriously hard to grow in controlled-conditions. At its current stage, it is known for the ability to be turned into a general antidote for the poisonous creatures that live around it.
Delta was impressed by what Hob and Gob had managed to find by sheer talent, skill, hard work and… maybe luck.
The egg she didn’t seemed to unlock anything yet but shrugged, if the gobs brought her more, she maybe get something. Until then, she could just make the egg.
Qarn Swallow Egg: A egg of the Qarn Swallow. This egg will never hatch due to being created in the dungeon, however, the taste is pretty good.
Delta tried to ignore how she now had bacon(in a sense), eggs, mushrooms, apples… and fish. She was only a few meats short of a full breakfast.
Delta tried to imagine how the poor souls would feel down the line to beat her epic dragon boss and get a hearty breakfast as a reward?
Delta would love it but she could she how people might be miffed.
The rope was some research. Perhaps into her traps? Or maybe she could make some item for people?
Delta looked at her research menu and felt like maybe she should start buying some…
Research Menu:
Irrigation: Study how to use water more efficiently to reduce the cost of crops that require water. DP 10 Basic Wooden Equipment: Be able to create weapons or basic armour of wood for loot drops or for Contracted Monsters able to use weapons. 5 DP Basic Stone Equipment: Be able to create weapons or basic armour of stone for loot drops or for Contracted Monsters able to use weapons. 15 DP Understand the best methods to use rope in various features: 10 DP
Delta shrugged and purchased them all.
Her 81 DP dropped to 41. Delta could’ve stockpile the points and waited until she unlocked some uber epic upgrade but…
That just seemed pointless.
Hob looked confused as as Delta giggled to herself.
Rope research purchased! All traps or constructions using rope and rope itself cost 1 less DP!
Irrigation research purchased! Rooms that grow crops or crop monsters cost 2 less DP for their functions and upgrades.
Basic Wooden Equipment now able to be made!
Basic Stone Equipment now able to be made!
Delta hummed, fingers wiggling as she grew curious..
“Wooden sword!” she called aloud.
Wooden sword added to the item menu! 2 mana!
Delta purchased it and gestured to the space near Hob. She winced as it clonked the goblin on the head and rattled to the ground.
“Master...” Hob groaned and blinked a few times at the object.
“Sword for Hob?” he whispered and picked it up. Delta blinked as the sword shrunk a little in the gobs hands. Her items came in perfect sizes?
Delta smacked herself. Of course they did, otherwise random drops would become hellish.
Did they lose this ability outside her dungeon or did all clothes resize themselves? Delta stared off into space at the mere idea.
No… wrong size clothes.
What heaven was this world? Gob returned and dumped more mushrooms and stones into her dungeon. He cheered and vanished again. Gob was a lot more energetic than Hob was…
Her mana pinged to 12 and held.
Delta wandered off, dazed. Hob charged into the boss room, showing off his new weapon as Delta walked through. Fran grinned and within a few moments had disarmed the gob without much effort.
Delta let them play as she looked at the last thing on her menu that blinked out at her. It wasn’t a new option, it was actually one of her very first ones.
Delta could have messed about with the newest upgrade.
Common Black Spiders: Upgrade Web to be stronger and less flammable. Will still catch fire if new open flame but takes more effort. DP 10
Delta could have given the room of nightmares more power… but she decided she needed to be a little more serious. She went to the Mushy just before her Boss room.
She eyed the option.
Mushroom Spitters: Greater Mushroom(10 Mana) or Myconid(10 Mana)
With some hesitance, Delta hit the button and a new menu appeared.
Greater Mushroom or Myconid?
Delta focused on the Mushy before her and hit Greater Mushroom. The mana left her and the Mushy went rigid before cracks appeared all over it’s body. Then a new body burst forth from the shattered shell of its former self.
The Greater Mushroom was like a Mushy but also very different. Delta knew this description was useless but didn’t care much as she was too busy screaming at the writhing form before her.
She fled to the end of the tunnel. She stared back as the monster, a good two foot taller than her old Mushy, stared back. Mushy looked like a giant mushroom with beady eyes and a maw with acid inside.
A Greater Mushroom was like that but someone decided it wasn’t scary enough and made the spongy skin dark red, the small beady eyes large narrow glaring holes, the mouth now having actual teeth and the light green acid was now a bubbling dark green liquid that hissed in the open air.
Oh and it now have thorny tentacles it was using to feel about in the dark.
Delta peeked around the corner and the Mushy… no it wasn’t just a Mushy. This was something else.
It was Great Mushy.
Delta knew she should have gone with the spiders… or wait… would they have gotten more evil as well?
Delta felt conflicted and fled to her core room, screeching past the Great Mushy who looked confused.
In her Core room, she slid down the closed door and sighed. She opened her eyes and began to scream again.
On her stone platform, on all four corners of the thing was four giant stone mushrooms.
Her menu opened up with a little cheery ring as if trying to surprise her.
Due to the Core’s love of Mushrooms, the Mushroom Grove, the Development of two or more Mushrooms and earning the title ‘Mushroom Forest Dungeon’ to 5 or more people, and evolving one Mushroom monster, you have gained the free Mushroom Statue Decoration item for your Core room!
Delta got up and ran with a blood-curdling battle cry at the menu which promptly ran away from her, the thing ringing in alarmed panic.
---
The spiders moved into the forest, new and fresh, the only goal was to return... return to the Queen.
---

Advertisement
- In Serial44 Chapters
RPG Immortal
Over the years, humanity spread its fingers over the surface of Earth. They left nothing untouched. Now, they can only build upward, leaving behind the poor and unfortunate to struggle on the forgotten ground below. Once a person from those upper areas who lived in bliss during his youth, Sigmarus Grayson gradually lost everything and was banished to the streets below. Eight years into his suffering, he discovers a briefcase holding the item that will change his life forever. Thus begins the journey of the RPG Immortal.
8 153 - In Serial8 Chapters
Adventures of one dude with an afro
...East-Blue, West-Blue, South-Blue, and North-Blue are the four seas that constitute most of the whole planet. Humanity is thriving on the small patches of land which poke out of the four seas. These four seas are separated horizontally by a humongous mountain which encircles the whole planet, called Red Line, and vertically by, the most dangerous sea known to man, Grand-Line. Both sides of Grand-Line are flanked by strips of the windless sea called Calm Belt. The eternally windless strips of sea are impossible to cross with only wind-powered ships. It might be calm over the water, but the water hides nasty beings called sea kings, not to be disturbed as the name suggests. People in this world can train themselves past any and all physical limits, only their mentality is the problem. A strong mind makes the body strong. Everyone in this world possesses this almost magical power in them called haki. There are three types of haki, two available to everyone and the last one is seen only once in seven million people. Different haki can be used to strengthen the body to even affect logia users, to predict and to foresee attacks, sense others’ prowess and even exert your will upon others. Fruits of the sea devil. Otherwise know as devil fruits, give miraculous powers to those who eat them, but robs them of their power to swim and makes them vulnerable to anything from normal seawater to the crystallized power of the sea, sea stone. Devil fruit powers are categorized into three different categories: Zoan type fruits allow their users to transform into an animal of a sort and gain their abilities. There are also human and mythical type zoans so they should actually be called transformation powers but those ones are extremely rare to the point of none existent that most just associate zoan transformations into animals. Logia fruits make their eaters become the element that the fruit was. For example, the one who eats the fire logia fruit is able to use fire in their attacks, become fire to avoid physical attacks and much else. Last but not least are the Paramecia fruits, these fruits are undoubtedly the weirdest and most random of the bunch. There are some that let you attract metal, make you slim and slippery, make your body able to split your body into many pieces, makes your body rubber, lets you control vibrations, light, pressure almost anything you can imagine. Lastly, there are two opposing factions in this world. The marines and the pirates, most strong people are part of either one. Both have their ups and downs. Pirates are free people who do whatever they want. Good or Bad. Marines are the upholders of justice in this world yet no justice system is without corruption. I closed the introductory book while frowning. "Isn't this a summary to the one piece world...?" The cover isn't mine and I am willing to take it down.
8 64 - In Serial11 Chapters
The Rise of The Emperor of The Dreadlands
Dane Carter was the son of the genius robotic engineer who was making various breakthroughs every year. Dane lived a rather ordinairy life compared to the money he had, even though he had rich parents. All was well until one day, when a group of hired thugs attacked attempted to murder his father after they were going home from a late night dinner. He ended up dying to save his father and thought it was all over until he awoke where his journey would begin. His journey to become the Emperer of the Dreadlands.
8 148 - In Serial11 Chapters
Inheritance
Soter survives a traumatic and lonely childhood as son of the tyrannical Consul. Ptolemy is an old soldier in the City Guard and mentor to Soter. When the City of Konstantinopolis is thrown into the chaos of war and political intrigue, Ptolemy must fulfil his duty and protect Soter. Soter, however, discovers a different path.
8 413 - In Serial31 Chapters
The Adrift Oath
Drowsed, tired and exhausted from the troubles of mundane life and exasperating routines, our main character mysteriously disappears from this plane of existence to only appear in another, in their journey they will have to form friendships and gather partners accross the new world that would help our protagonist affect its nations and kingdoms to go all the way as to meddle with the business of the divine in search for the truth on their disappearance, but what would happen if in that process they would also uncover the lies that kept the new world stable over many millennia?
8 112 - In Serial15 Chapters
A futurist leader inside a fantasy world
Jack who was on Earth empire have been reincarnated into a fantasy world. Using his old knowledge and skill , he plans to force the new world into a new age. *Note: the updates will be random and I not the best writer. P.S. I will be doing this for fun. Chapter Editing in progress
8 214

