Chapter 38

Another morning came, the Lewis' sat to have their breakfast together. The air around felt so heavy. Everyone seated mutedly with only the sound of utensils could be heard as they ate. No one dared to talk.

Andy noticed that everyone was having a hard time.

Her mother, the glow in her face faded with visible fluffy eyes due to heavy crying.

Her brother, who was a mess early in the morning. Anyone can tell he's having hangover.

Her father, despite his domineering appearance, he's eyes were telling he did not have a wink of sleep last night.

Andy tightened her hold of her spoon and fork. This is what scared her. Causing her family grief because of her selfishness. She's hurting by blaming herself even more.

The first to leave the table was Kevin, then her father pulling along her mother. She could see the weariness in her mother's eyes. Like she doesn't want to leave her but she had to.

Like she's more confused than her daughter.

And there and then, being left alone, Andy begun her cry of the day.

[*********]

Andy knocked and entered her father's study room. Her father was seating on a swiveled chair by the table. He uninterestingly looked up at her. She stood firm in front of him.

"Dad,"

"I know, you are disappointed in me."

"But this is who I am Dad." Tears begun to form in her eyes.

"One day, I looked up at my reflection of a girl who had been fighting and trying so hard."

"And for the first time, I looked up at myself with acceptance and love."

"I'm tired of fighting against myself Dad."

Andy's lips trembled, she bit her lower lip to suppress herself to sob.

"But as I start to love myself, I got scared Dad." She clenched her hand.

"I know the weight of my truth but as I know I'll stumble and fall, please watch my back Dad."

Mr. Lewis turned his chair around, with his back to his daughter. He did not say a word and Andy continued.

"As I start to love myself, can't we, together, love the real me Dad?"

"Can't we, together love my flaws, my weirdness, my vulnerability and my truth Dad?"

"Please give me a chance to live this life."

"I don't want to worry about this my entire life and live in regrets."

"And if it will make me fall and break my bones, will you have me in your lap Dad?"

At that instance, Andy broke and succumbed to crying.

Mr. Lewis didn't budge nor spoke a word.

Feeling suffocated, Andy hurriedly left the room.

Little did she know, that her mother was on the veranda, shivering in tears as Kevin held her. The three had prior meeting before Andy dropped by.

Well, to Andy , she felt empty after pouring out her heart. She can't even feel her feet on the ground as she walked out of that room.

It seemed like she's lost and the next thing she knew, she's knocking on her Grandpa John's front door.

It was a one fine night, so ironic of what she's feeling inside.

Then a startled face greeted her. John was not expecting her to come nor he expect the state of her granddaughter so messed up in distress.

The girl threw herself to John and cried. She cried till her cry became hoarse and poured her heart again to the listening ears of her grandpa John.