《Dysfunctional – An Assassin’s Guide To Reincarnating In Another World》Dysfunctional - An Assassin's Guide To Reincarnating In Another World
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"Yo, dude, long time no see!"
"...it's been like a week at most. Lost your right foot, huh?"
"Yeah, it's a long story-...no wait, actually, it's not that long, a Vampire blasted it off. It was inconvenient at first, but I learnt to hover around using Flight without burning through too much Mana, so it's all good!"
"Uh...great. Enough small talk, let's just cut to the chase, Rion...what are you doing here?" I inquired, refusing to let him keep throwing me off.
I was currently in a meeting hall in the Guild, along with Rion, Headmaster Yiserir, Elina and Instructor Tabbs. With Neo dead, those two were the new number one and two S-Ranks around. Side note, I had been pretty curious about how Elina became an Adventurer in the first place, since her combat skills were basically non-existent, so I asked her.
Apparently, she'd done just enough to graduate the Academy when it came to Elemental and Combat skills, and after she got recognition as a skilled spell user as an Adventurer and made her value to the Rustlands apparent, she stopped taking Quests entirely, and instead climbed up the ranks in exchange for providing spells to the Guild...after pulling all that off, it's no wonder she had such a big head. Anyway, back to the matter at hand...
"Okay, let's get down to business and stuff! So, we were attacked by the Vampires like three and a half days ago..."
He explained what had happened in The Empire when they were attacked, all the Retribution Tier members survived, barely, while practically the entirety of their lower ranked members were wiped out, save for a handful of researchers and lapdogs that had been away on a task at the beach area to the north of The Empire. And they'd used a hidden cache of Blood Crystals to blow up their nation, which wiped out the Vampire Minions but also killed off nearly all their own subordinates.
"Huh, so that's how nearly a hundred Vampires died at the exact same time...I didn't think there'd be that many Blood Crystals left, I thought the small amount I saw in the Research building was the entirety of it," I remarked, before adding, "Well, at least the Blood Crystals are all gone-...ah, crap, the Blood Crystals are all gone."
Those things weren't exactly what you'd call 'ethically sourced', but I knew from experience how much of a punch they packed, a few of those magic nukes might have come in handy against the Vampires.
"I assume you wish to request an alliance again?" Inquired Headmaster Yiserir with a raised eyebrow.
"Not exactly, more like a mutually-beneficial truce that'll only last till the Vampires are taken care of. Art deduced that if we just sit around and wait for the Vamps to attack us, we're dead as fuck! So, we strike them first. But we don't have the numbers, you know? Actually, we don't need a lot of numbers, just a moderate amount of like maybe sixty or seventy at most...Art said we have a fair shot at winning if we can catch them off-guard. He also said the odds were against us, but hey, better to die fighting, amiright?"
I had to agree with that notion, I certainly had no interest in waiting for my death. And as much as I hated to admit it, Lagusa was pretty good at planning and strategizing. I wasn't too bad at it myself, but considering that he's the one who taught me how to think critically and analytically, I doubt I'm better than him in that regard. And he wasn't an optimist, far from it, so if he actually bothered to mention a plan, then he expected it to have a reasonable chance of success.
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"We cannot argue with you on that, but even in this situation, we cannot simply agree to working with you people just like that...we would like to first hear the specifics of your plan," Responded Elina.
"Well, it's not fully fleshed out yet. But mainly we plan to attack from the north since it's the direction they'll be least expecting an attack from, and we'll stage a diversionary attack from the west using a few of our remaining lapdogs. While they're causing a distraction, we'll covertly take out as many Vampires as possible. Well, not that we have a way to do that yet, but we're working on it."
"Yeah, that's not possible...taking them out covertly without knowing where their cores are is impossible, finishing off a Vampire would require a powerful attack, one that'd probably inadvertently make a lot of noise, if even one other Vampire sees or hears it, that's that-...wait, see and hear...," I remarked, my eyes widening as an idea hit me, "Hey, that could work..."
"Ooh, you got an idea?" Asked Rion with an intrigued look.
"Hm, I think I'll keep that to myself for now. But we just might agree to work with you guys after all...how about you come back tomorrow and we'll let you know?"
"Aw, why you gotta be such a tease, bro? Well, fine, I guess that works."
He left shortly after that, a couple of Adventurers escorting him out, though their real purpose was to make sure that he actually left. I doubt he'd pull something in a situation like this, but better safe than sorry. The meeting regarding what we should do next would be taking place this afternoon, and we had a new topic of discussion. Work with The Empire or not?
...
...
"I am against working with those bastards," Remarked Aurich firmly, looking quite disgusted with the proposition.
Yeah, that wasn't exactly surprising, all things considered. It was a few hours later, and the meeting had begun. Those present included Erhtaph, Atticus, Headmaster Yiserir, Elina, Princess Agatha, Prince Ocroed Rustlands and Instructor Tabbs. Headmaster Yiserir had just finished relaying the events of this morning's talk with Rion, and the former king of Goldway was the first to respond.
"I understand your sentiment, Goldway, but given everything that is at stake, we may not have a choice," Argued Erhtaph reasonably.
"Would you be saying that if they had destroyed your nation and then proceeded to torture you for over a year?"
It was hard to argue with that point...
"I'm not too comfortable with letting them attack Silvland in order to defeat the Vampires, since they won't care too much about casualties, but we gotta look at the bigger picture here. A preemptive strike may be our best option, but it'll be pointless if we don't have enough power to pull it off," Pointed out Princess Agatha objectively.
"Even so...," Muttered Aurich bitterly.
"Of course, we cannot agree to work with them unless doing so would give us a reasonable chance of victory, but the outline of their plan of which we were told about seems to be fairly solid, attacking from the north while creating a diversion to the east...ah, that's right, you claimed to have an idea regarding how we can eliminate the Vampires covertly, Kuro. Elaborate on that," Said Instructor Tabbs, turning to me.
Yeah, I was pretty stoked at myself for coming up with this idea...
"Right, for my idea to work, we'll need a new spell. Well, not exactly new, more like a variation on spells we already have...the soundproof and invisibility barriers. The spell we need is a barrier that is both soundproof and invisible, and also extremely tough, tough enough to trap a Vampire without breaking too easily. Basically, we enter Silvland covertly, each person will sneak up on any Vampires they encounter and then activate this spell, trapping both the Vampire and themselves in it. That way, we won't have to worry about being seen or heard even if things get noisy."
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"Hey, that's pretty clever, it just might work," Remarked Princess Agatha with a nod.
"Oh, and there's one more feature I'd like this barrier to have, but I don't know if it'll be possible...while the barrier is active and the user is attempting to kill the Vampire, it'll be for naught if another Vampire happens to approach the area and bumps into the barrier...they may not be able to see it or hear anything happening inside it, but they could still feel it if they near it...so, make it intangible, but in a way that lets those outside walk through it as if it's not even there, while preventing those that are inside from leaving unless the user manually deactivates it. It's an almost contradictory spell, solid on the inside and intangible on the outside...think you can pull that off, Elina?"
After a brief silence, she responded...
"A highly dense barrier that is invisible and soundproof will be easy...however, to make it intangible in the way you described will be very difficult...I shall certainly take on the challenge, but I cannot do it alone...I will require my former apprentice to assist me," She replied with a thoughtful expression.
"Az, huh...I'll do my best to convince him," I sighed, dreading that prospect.
I'm sure even he won't be able to refuse, given the dire circumstances of the situation.
"So, then...," Spoke up Erhtaph, looking at me quizzically.
"Yeah, we should-...or rather, I recommend that we should work with them."
"I agree, we will likely be destroyed if we wait for the Vampires to attack," Nodded Erhtaph in agreement.
"Very well, then...we shall work with The Valaque Empire until the Vampire threat is no more, in no way is this an alliance, simply an unavoidable joining of forces in the face of a common enemy," Declared Prince Ocroed, as everyone voiced their agreement, with the exception of Aurich, of course.
"What if the Vampires begin moving south towards us again before we can strike them?" Inquired Aurich pointedly.
"Shouldn't be a problem, we can teleport back and flank them if they do, they won't be expecting that. Given their remaining numbers, they'll either send a smaller number than last time, or they'll leave Silvland near-unoccupied...which we can use to kill their king, that'll probably spur them on to turn around and head back to Silvland. Ideally, Bronztan's help would be useful, though I doubt that they'll help...but maybe we can convince them to provide another diversionary attack from the east, at least as a hit-and-run tactic...Instructor Tabbs, could you arrange that?" I requested hopefully.
"Well, I do not mind, but why me specifically?"
I'll be blunt...
"Because you're a woman, so you stand a better chance of convincing that stubborn-ass sexist queen than a man would."
"You don't sugar-coat anything, do you?" Laughed Princess Agatha with an amused expression.
"Regarding what you said about killing the Vampire King, I just realized something...if you are able to steal his Cross, the battle will be over. You see, unlike humans who may be able to resist it, Vampires cannot disobey his Cross, so you need only command them to commit suicide and they will have no choice but to obey," Explained Atticus with a slight smirk.
"Oh? Well, how about that...I think we should keep that particular bit of info from The Empire, don't want them stealing his Cross instead of me...I don't know if it's actually even possible for someone besides me to be able to steal a Vampire's Cross, but better safe than sorry and stuff. After all, if someone from The Empire gains the ability to control Vampires with no defiance, the situation would only get worse," I surmised grimly.
"That is a good call, even if we are working together with them, we certainly cannot trust them," Responded Erhtaph approvingly.
"Hm, since the main attack will be from the north, that means that we will have to go to the location of The Empire. So, I suppose the question now is this...how many of us do we send?" Mused Headmaster Yiserir with a frown.
"Good question...with a plan like this, large numbers will be a disadvantage, we need to emphasize quality over quantity...the only people who should be a part of this mission are those that are capable of reliably killing a Vampire on their own. That said, we shouldn't leave the Rustlands completely defenseless either, so a few of our strong Adventurers should stay behind, including at least one or two of the S-Ranks," I suggested, after thinking it over.
We continued discussing the smaller details of the operation for a while after that, before wrapping up the meeting. Tomorrow, I'd be giving Rion our answer, after which the specifics regarding time and date could be set. There was a time where I hated being a part of tedious meetings and discussions, especially in my old world, I really disliked it when clients would give me long rundowns, like, just e-mail the details to me and let me do my thing! But lately...I've gotten used to it.
I still don't like it, but it's been happening so frequently lately that I've just gotten used to it...its kinda like eating vegetables as a kid, you don't like it, but you get used to it. Well, not that I would know, when I was a kid I was just grateful to eat at all, I didn't actually start caring about, or even noticing, stuff like taste, flavor and texture until I was like ten or eleven. Anyway, I've got nothing going on today after this meeting, so...let's just fast forward to the next day...
...
...
It was the next day, and I was on my way to the Guild, Rion was there, having arrived a little earlier. After yesterday's meeting, I had to expend a lot of energy in convincing Az to assist Elina with the spell I requested...it wasn't easy, but I eventually managed to get him to cave in. After I meet with Rion, I'll be going to Elina's place to check on the progress of the spell. I reached and entered the Guild, before one of the staff guided me to where Rion was.
"Yo! I hope this time your answer ain't gonna be a no, is that fo sho?" Greeted Rion in a rap, as I walked into the Guild meeting room he'd been led into, "When you answer tho, give it to me in a flo!"
"Uh...if you're asking me to answer you in a rhyme, then no, I'm not going to do that. But that aside, yeah, we agree to work with you guys to take out the Vampires."
"Hey, yo, that's cool, just like a swimming pool-."
"You have got to stop rapping," I interrupted with a sigh.
"Aw, you're such a spoilsport, bro. Anyway, here, take this. It's a bunch of teleportation spells, teleport to The Empire this evening, like around five, and bring everyone else who's gonna be a part of this. Oh, and about that...Art said to only bring people that are strong enough to kill a Vampire, it's fine even if it's just like twenty or twenty-five people, quality over quantity, you know?"
"Yeah, we already decided on that...I suppose it's good that we're on the same page in that regard."
"Cool! Guess you and Art think similarly, like master like apprentic-...I take it that death glare means that you don't appreciate that comparison, huh?" He began, before trailing off sheepishly.
"Don't compare me to that bastard, we're nothing alike," I growled irritably.
"Heh, if you say so, bro! Well, I should get going. See ya later today, looking forward to being on the same side, my dude!"
"Temporarily, and don't call me 'my dude'."
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Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Don't forget to vote, and feel free to leave a comment, I appreciate any and all feedback and criticism!
Also, check out my Instagram account @aimdaqs for posts relating to this book.
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