"NOTHING!"

I've nothing to wear. I don't have new clothes. I never bought anything for myself in the last three months I've been working as a barista.

All I did was to save money and give some to my roommate, Ellis, his real name, but on the runway, she's Conflagration!

"Nothing?" Ellis shrugged. "Just his name?"

"Yeah, just Fei. Oakley even tricked me that he went back at the shop."

"Oh, how nice. I like that guy, Oakley. He tricks Trick. That's funny."

My left eyebrow arched. "So, you're on his side now, Miss Conflagration?"

"Yeah, I mean, he tricked you to see if you're really into this guy. Come on, my dear Tricky. Don't you really like to know more about this guy?"

"I do… It's just that… I don't know how. I mean, I'm used to guys talking to me first. I don't really know how to be the predator."

Ellis rolled his eyes. "You really don't know how to get ahead in life, do you? Don't you learn anything from the mother of the legendary house of Sylvanie, bless her soul?"

Ellis refers to my drag mother, Oleander Sylvanie. "As if my mom would tell me how to flirt. We didn't have that talk. She's very competitive in the categories. She just told me that if I ever liked a guy, just make sure I spend five dates with him before I turn myself in. Like, beneath the sheets, if you know what I'm saying."

"Hey! What's wrong with turning yourself in on the first date?" Ellis protested.

I laughed so hard. "No, I didn't say it's wrong. Perhaps, she just wants me to really get to know the guy before I invest myself in him. She was hurt a long time ago, and she became a cynic in love. So, when she found drag, she focused herself on it and made it her life. That's where she found love. In the categories."

"And your life is different than her. We all love Mama Oleander, but you deserve to get laid too! When was the last time you've had a dick?" Ellis asked.

Come to think about it, I can barely remember the last time I had sex. Was it a year ago? Or two years ago?

I guess the reason I can't remember any because they weren't special at all. It wasn't the glorious experience most of us are anticipating. It was drunk sex in a club where a lot of guys did it in comfort room cubicles at two in the morning where everyone is either wasted, stoned, or out of their minds. Just like me, when I tried drinking alcohol of different colors.

"I… Ah… I don't remember at all, Ellis. That was a long time ago," I reacted.

"All the more reason you land some cock tonight! How about you wear that moss green jacket I bought for you last Thanksgiving? You've only worn it once."

Oh, that bomber jacket. Good choice. "Okay, let me just get it."

I went to my closet and grabbed that jacket and showed it to Ellis. "Okay, so this one looks okay. Then, what would be my top?"

"Just wear any white shirt. Then, fit jeans to feature your bulge, and white shoes. Simple, but catchy," said Ellis.

"Bulge?! Ellis!" I covered my crotch right away. The thought of people staring at my groin area embarrasses me.

Ellis rolled his eyes again. "Trick, you've got the goods. I may have seen you jerk off in your room a couple of times, but whenever you wear that pair of khaki slacks for work, I can easily tell."

My mouth formed an O after hearing that. "Why are you peeking at my room when I'm doing something?"

"Oh, come on. I'm not a disturbance at all. It's not like I sat in front of your door, munching slowly and silently on my bowl of microwave oven-popped popcorn, plain salted flavor. Sometimes, barbeque and cheese if available. But I can barely see your entire body because of course, I can't open the door wide enough. And I totally respect you, since you're like a brother to me. Don't worry. I'm not seeing you as a sex object. I stand up when you cum and go to bed after I brush my teeth, or sometimes I don't. It's just so refreshing to me to see someone masturbating in my former room. Makes me remember my teenage memories when I had the most extreme fantasies with the entire football team in school, especially the quarterback," Ellis explained in a chill manner.

"That explains the popcorn remains when I step out of the room," I spoke, as I put together the puzzle pieces. "Why are you doing that? I'm not like a movie. Just browse Twitter instead."

"You're like a one-man show, honey. But since the cat's out of the bag, okay, I won't watch you starting now. However, if you leave your door open again and you feel like touching yourself, it's not my fault that I'll be sitting again to watch some action. You careless wanker."

I groaned. I mean, I don't mind if Ellis finds out about my sex life, which basically consists of my hand and my tissue box. It's just odd that someone is looking at you doing personal things. I don't intend to be an exhibitionist.

"Whatever. I just wanna get wasted tonight. And I need to look good. Oakley knows probably the best clubs and bars in town," I said, while trying out the fashion suggestion of Ellis.

"Honey, your motive is to suck a dick tonight. The bar scene would just be an alibi."

I sarcastically grinned. "If it happens, it will. I don't need to stamp on my forehead that I'm looking for a dick to suck. I just wanna be carefree. Bond with Oakley. That's it."

"How about you do it with Oakley instead?" a bad idea from Ellis.

I winced. "He's straight as a pole where pole dancers dance. I can sense that. But I appreciated it when he told me that he doesn't judge people based on their sexual orientations."

"Oh, such a good guy, Oakley is."

"Yes, and we will be going to this party before we go to the club. He needs to make an appearance to his classmate's best friend's grandma's 99th birthday."

Ellis was surprised. "99? How can one live that long? I only want to live until 50."

"Hey! Stop kidding around with your age," I yelled. "That's a terrible joke."

"It's not a joke," Ellis disagreed. "I'm currently experiencing mid-life crisis."

"You're only 25," I told him.

"Exactly. Do the math."

I groaned again. "Stop talking about that. I don't wanna lose another important person in my life. This year has been very challenging for me. With my house mother and siblings gone, I don't want another one to leave me alone. You're like a brother to me, despite you having the pleasure of watching me wank."

"Aww, I love you, honey. Don't worry. We can still have 25 more years together," Ellis hugged me. "And I am still looking forward to seeing Fei."

When I heard his name, I remembered the very moment we laid our eyes on each other. The feeling registered again in my mind. That made my heart flutter.

"What if he's straight?" I wondered, which I never thought earlier.

"If he's straight, he wouldn't have exerted any effort to correct you from misspelling his name. I'm sure he's also interested in you," with conviction, Ellis uttered.

I sighed in disappointment. "That's just a guess. I don't like to have that idea stuck in my mind. Otherwise, I'm just lingering for nothing."

"Patrick Dean Sylvanie," Ellis stood in front of me and held both my shoulders. He looked at me with a serious countenance and spoke, "you don't get another shot in life once opportunity arrived and you let it go. What if that was the last time you saw Fei? What if you never see him again? What if he never sees you again? That's when you linger for nothing. When you didn't try to do something. I may not be as good as Aretha Franklin, but let me spell it out for you. R-E-G-R-E-T. You hear me?"

Ellis is right. How many chances do I have to see Fei again? What if after he went to the shop this morning, he was hit by a car? Or he went back to the East or somewhere? Or he's about to be married to his fiancée?

"All right," I said with determination. "What will I do when I see him?"

"Ask him how long is his dick," Ellis blurted.

"Come on! Be serious, Ellis!"

"I am dead serious. I really wanted to know!"

One more time, I groaned. "That's not a great line to begin a conversation!"

"It works for me. Why won't it work for you? I'm sure—"

Ellis has been interrupted by my phone that just rang. It was Oakley calling me. I picked it up and spoke to him.

"Hey, Oaks. What's up?"

"Where are you now, Trick? You should be here right now!"

Oakley and I decided to meet at Robbie's before we head to the party. "Why? We agreed to meet at seven. It's only six-thirty."

"Fei's here!" he said from the other line.

My eyes squinted automatically. "You can't fool me twice, Oaks. Nice try."

A few moments later, my phone beeped. I received a message from Oakley with a photo attached to it.

It was Fei, sitting at the corner of the coffee shop!

"Ellis, look! It's Fei!" I showed Ellis his picture.

"Oh, my heavens. He's super hot! What are you still waiting for? Fly now to f/ucking Robbie's and ask his dick size! Go!" Ellis clamored as I ran out of the house.