The Villainess and I, her Zombie Chapter 322
Advertisement
The Dandelions helped out the supposed dwarf with gathering any monster parts that would sell for something, - as for the copious amount of blood, it was all washed away by the joint effort of Lairs and In're and their water-based magic attacks.
Such actions weren't strange in the least and were just a natural part of hunting monsters – the less blood and scraps of meat was left to rot on the scene the better – a proper clean-up reduced the risk of luring stronger monsters to basically zero.
"Good work. I'll throw in some useful advice for surviving in this awful territory as a bonus."
Zombie smirked with satisfaction, looking at the neat packages full of fresh merchandise ready to be carried and sold off to the nearest guild, trader, blacksmith, or tailor.
"People of Envy territory are the most cunning people you will probably meet in your lives – not because they are genetically different than others, mind you, but because every single law in here is rigged against them and if they are not fucking someone over that inevitably means that they are the ones getting fucked. Not in a good way."
The young boy posing as a banished dwarf began explaining while distributing the packages to carry to the five adventurers while making a conscious decision to not carry anything himself.
|Not in a good way? Pervert.|
|Hey, you were the one who told me that dwarves are usually crude – I'm only playing my part.|
Patience and Zombie had a quick exchange in Zombie's head before the boy continued.
"You lot have a good team composition, your gear is properly maintained, and you clearly have good teamwork and like each other – those are the obvious signs that you are not from this territory. Frankly, aside from you -"
The boy continued stopping only for a moment to point at the rat-faced Shanks.
"- you all look like some kindhearted fools that will share their money willingly if some pitiful looking scammer just limped your way and reached out their trembling hand. Especially you Marshmallow – you better not talk to any strangers at all."
Advertisement
Zombie turned to the towering woman and shook his head at her.
"...I don't think that helping others in need is a wrong thing to do..."
Uresha lowered her head and started fidgeting while dodging making eye contact.
"See? You are trying to defend a hypothetical scammer!"
He rolled his eyes and glared back at the rat-faced man.
"Shiv, from now on it's your duty to get Marshmallow away from any strangers while you are in the Envy's territory. Grab her hand and don't let her wander off and waste money and goodwill on some scum."
Zombie demanded and Shanks actually stepped in and grabbed Uresha's hand before he himself realized what he was doing.
/proficiency level reached
skill level up
leadership (level 5)
|Leadership leveled up? Huh? So what, are those guys my replacement for the chickens now?|
Zombie scoffed internally, looking at the system message that popped up as soon as the rat-faced man listened to his command.
|Give him a break, Shanks is under the weakening seal of the Sloth family, his stats are really bad and... actually, aside from Lairs and In're the other three Dandelions have really poor MDF, and since leadership is a passive skill it's no wonder that they are affected by it to some degree.|
Patience hurried with an explanation while both the tank and the thief of the Dandelions adventuring party turned completely red from the sudden embarrassment as if they were just some school-kids during their very first date.
"This dwarf guy is incredible...! It's been less than an hour and he caused Shanks and Uresha to make more progress than they did themselves in the past ten years...!"
In're pulled both Rotte and Lairs close and whispered to them with eyes glowing from the excitement.
"But that is exactly why he's fucking suspicious! Why the fuck is he doing that? Besides, he himself said that we shouldn't fucking trust anyone from the fucking Envys' territory..."
Advertisement
Laris furrowed her brows and scoffed.
"And what's wrong with that advice...?"
Rotte raised his brows and asked dumbfounded.
"That we are in the fucking Envys' territory and he is one of the fucking people from the Envy territory! He even said that the people from here are fucking scummy because the environment they live in is the fucking worst – but that means that even though he's a dwarf he still is a fucking scumbag too because he lives here!"
Lairs complained glancing angrily at the supposed dwarf at the head of the group already ready to leave.
"Yo! Lairs! I'm here just for a few months so I didn't soaked in the scammer juices, so let me give you another piece of advice. Your conspicuous whisper is louder than your normal voice you know? Good thing that Shiv's in charge of stealth, you just stick to magic. Now, let's get going."
"Fuck...!"
Zombie glanced at the three huddled together and sighed, shaking his head in disappointment before raising his hand and waving forward to signal the departure while the potty-mouthed mage cursed loudly and blushed in shame from being called out like that.
"Umm... mister dwarf, we were technically ordered to check the area for the unusual monster activity and..."
"And you did, a group of goblins lead by two hobgoblins was growing in strength, but since their remnants are safely stored on your back, I would say that this mission of yours is completed."
Shanks raised his hand to voice the slight problem with just walking away, but it was simply shrugged at by the boy in the barrel-like armor.
"O-oh, yes, I guess in that case, we can just go with you."
The rat-faced man backed off and returned to Uresha's side.
|You could use this chance to introduce yourself, you know? Mister dwarf?|
Patience asked and mocked the boy but got no reaction whatsoever, not even a flinch or a bat of an eye.
|H-hey, I was just kidding, okay...?|
Not even a full thirty seconds later the sealed overseer seemed worried about the silence...
"..."
But nothing could get to the boy whose attention got focused on a small throwing knife attached to one of the straps on Shank's leather vest.
|Ah...! I see how it is... Ignoring me and thinking only about your pet...! Hmph!|
Patience realized what was going on and scoffed, sounding as if they turned away.
"Say, Shiv, can you show me that?"
Zombie, completely unperturbed by Patience's behavior reached out his hand, pointing at the small partially concealed weapon.
"Oh? Sure, it's just something I bought it as a just-in-case spare weapon, but it's actually too light, too flimsy, and inappropriately balanced to be of any other use than just a letter opener."
The rat-faced man laughed awkwardly and put up an excuse before taking out the tiny throwing blade shaped like a knife and handing it to the boy.
|Any other use, he says... that clearly is just a letter opener... Buying this as a weapon... this guy might be just as naive as his girlfriend...|
Patience sighed, sounding as if they were shaking their head in disappointment.
"..."
*SHIIING*
"!!!!"
Both the weapon and Zombie's eyes shone with a pale white light as it got swung downwards and despite its meager size, the sword-shaped letter opener created quite an impressive sound – causing the confused Dandelions to freeze on the spot.
"Since you're not using it, I'll take it, alright?"
Zombie looked back at the confused Shanks and started playing with the tiny sword that didn't look that much different from a child's toy in his small hands.
Advertisement
- In Serial68 Chapters
The Eager Dimension Hopper (SCP)
SCP 507 didn't utilize his abilities properly, that's what got him killed. Let's see if someone with ambition does any better. -----------------------------AN: Updates will happen periodically . I don't have a set release schedule, but new chapters will come out frequently. I'm also fairly new to writing stories, so I appreciate any creative criticism. I'm also posting to Scribblehub under the same name. Thanks for reading! Source Material: http://www.scpwiki.com/scp-507
8 122 - In Serial267 Chapters
Path of the Whisper Woman
For as long as she can remember Gimlea's mother has trained her to become a whisper woman--to do what she never could. When her mother takes her to see the goddess's procession Gimlea makes a vow to see that path through. But not for her mother's reasons of vicarious power and accomplishment. Gimlea will become one of the goddess's chosen so that she no longer has to be under anyone's thumb. And she will do whatever it takes to make that happen. ********************************************* I will do my best to post another chapter every Wednesday by 8:00 PM CST!
8 113 - In Serial30 Chapters
Re: Soldier
Ran was a normal soldier fighting during the ressource wars that ravaged the end of the 21st century. However he fell after an unfortunate encounter with the wrong end of a rotating cannon. But instead of dying he woke up in another world full of magic and monsters, how will he survive ? Witness the fusion of futuristic science and fantasy in this thrilling adventure !
8 237 - In Serial13 Chapters
The Order Between Life And Death
There is order between life and death, by natural, not by man!!
8 182 - In Serial32 Chapters
Gods of Tartarus: Melody of Wrath
Mallory. A poor girl of the modern times who was plagued with a genetic disease which caused her to be small and weak, had breathed her final breath. In a sea of clouds, she meets a god who had been trying to keep her alive, but failed to do so in the end. With promises to fulfill any wish she desires, Mal wished to be big and strong, but due to an unknown issue, she is no longer a human, but a giant! Can she adjust to her new life and escape the cruel, male dominant, and abusive giant clan? Will she be able to survive on her own? Read on and follow, Melody, as she grows to larger than life!
8 154 - In Serial11 Chapters
Life is Wilde
There is a world where fiction meets reality. A world where human logic may prevail. Where human logic is the main thing that binds humanity. A world where Humanity is lesser to The World.Synopsis (For Chapters after Authors Note):Oscar is a child alike most others. He loves his mother, doesn't know his dad, and lives in a dome. Only, his greatest dream is to explore the vast wildes that plague the world. The problem is, the wildes house strange creatures mutated by radiation and a mysterious energy called "The Essence". How will Oscar ever survive in this chaotic world? Come, watch as our beloved character grows, makes friends, and paves a road into the firmaments as he establish his name in the new historical categories.Author's note*:This is an idea I'm roughing out. I'll be writing randomly, attenmpting to forge a storyline from my own sweat, determination, and creativity. It's loosely based on some Wuxia/Xuanhuan fictions I've read. It will have elements of human physiology, psychology, environmental science, nature vs man, man vs nature, human nature vs humanity, etc. This story is mean to be a work of fiction. It encompasses some of my views on morality. It will have corruption, foul-language, ignorance, racism. It will glean a bright world with imagination fused with the dark shadows for some to seek refuge. Though, in the world I will be creating... Refuge comes at a cost. A steep one.That is the Way of the World. The way of my world.Need cover art plz
8 120

