"Shi Lian….you still love my Atian right?" Meng Yao asks meekly. Mo Sha Sha gasps and Shi Lian is glaring at her with disbelief. Shi Lian does not respond. Does she still love him? Yes, of course, she does but it is still the same as it was years ago? No. she remembered him every day when she was in America; he was always there in her heart even though they have not seen each other for years. He is her first love after all and it is hard to get over someone when he is your first love.

"Mrs. Hu why ask such a stupid question?" she snaps. She cannot fall back; she needs to be strong just like how she molded herself all these years.

"You don't love him?" she is shocked by the tone of her.

"Does it matter?" she gives her a cold look and stands up. "I am going to my room. It was nice meeting you," she declares as she walks to the stairs.

"Shi Lian! I know you are hurt because of what happened earlier and I am truly sorry for that! I have regretted this for years now and it is killing me. I will not force you to forgive me but can you please meet with Atian?" she practically begs. Si Lian did not turn back, she keeps on walking but it is hard for her to see her like this.

"You know Atian remembers your name!" She confesses loudly, wanting Shi Lian to hear it. Shi Lian freeze. She snaps her head to her and marches downstairs towards her.

"What did you say?" she implores looking at Hu Meng Yao.

"Yes, it is true. He remembered you on his own. It was like a miracle and the doctor said my Atian would be cured very soon. He is in good condition now but from deep inside he is disheartened. I asked him many times what the issue is but he refuses to tell me but I know it is related to you," she cries telling about her son's condition.

"Just meet him once," she pleads to hold Shi Lian's hands. Shi Lian is standing like a statue, she has not spoken anything yet.

"I will take my leave now," Meng Yao says as he got up breaking herself from Shi Lian. Taking her purse from the sofa, she makes her exit from there.

"Shi….will you…" her mother asks but is cut midsentence by Shi Lian.

"Not now Mum" she turns around and runs to her room before her feelings get to spill out.

"My poor child..." Mo Sha Sha sough taking her seat. She feels bad for her daughter to struggle with everything by herself but what can she do to help her? The current Shi Lian is like a closed book who refuses to reveal her feeling so it is hard to know what is going on let alone help her.

Locking the door of her room, Shi Lian lies down on the bed feeling her heart is going to rip any soon. Everything that Hu Meng Yao has said is floating inside her head. She is relieved to know that Atian is in good condition but the thing of meeting him, seeing him again after years of separation makes her scared. She desperately wants to meet him but after what happened she feels ashamed. Getting drunk and sleeping with a stranger is not something someone is proud of. She is no longer the same pure Shi Lian she was, she lost her virginity to someone she does not even know. She feels something on her cheeks, she touches her cheek and feels something watery, she is crying. "I am sorry Atian…." Tears roll down her orifices as she cries her heart out.

In those three years, she made herself strong enough to not cry for him or anyone else; but her shattered heart is never mended and the hollowness inside her is never filled. Crying after so long makes her want to cry more, she wants to let out everything, the heaviness in her heart is making her sick.