AARYN

When he'd left Gar, it had been with the intention of attending the disformed. They were usually at the cave in the mornings, and he'd not been as present lately. They'd be wondering what happened last night after he disappeared. And if he and Elreth were to speak with the elders about mating, he wanted his council to know of it as well.

Not to mention that he had a little bit of a point to prove.

Except, on his way he'd decided to stop at home and bathe and change his clothes. But when he'd left his bedroom, ready to head out, it occurred to him how quiet the house was. His mother was almost always home. The tribe provided for her as a widow, and because since she was so low on the hierarchy, it was always difficult for her to find work. She took in washing sometimes, or mending. But usually she spent her days cooking and reading, or occasionally painting. And even though she was quiet, and her pass-times were quiet. The house wasn't usually still.

"Mom?!" he called from the top of the stairs, uncertain whether to look more closely downstairs in case he just hadn't noticed her curled up on the large chair in the living room, or whether she might be—

"Aaryn?" she said softly from her room on the floor above him. But her voice sounded… wrong.

Turning quickly, he trotted up the stairs to her room, knocking quietly before pushing the door open.

The room was almost as dark as Gar's had been, and Aaryn's stomach clenched.

No. No no no. She hadn't had a turn like this in years. He'd thought they were over.

No!

"Mom?" he said quietly.

"I'm okay," she said, her voice quavering on the edge of tears. Aaryn hurried across the room to her bed where she curled up on the side closest to the door—his father's side. She always said he'd insisted on it, in the event that someone ever came for them, he would be between her and the attack.

She only slept there when she was in the fog.

The fog.

That's what he'd called it since he was a young cub, when she used to suffer it more often than not. He'd been ten before he realized that it wasn't normal for mothers to spend most of their time in bed. Only his relationship with Elreth and the attention of her parents had made a significant impact on his mother's life and outlook. So much so, that he hadn't thought about her bouts of this… melancholy for years.

"What's wrong, Mom?" he asked, sitting on the edge of the bed and stroking her hair the way she liked.

"I'll be okay," she croaked. "It was a rough day yesterday, that's all."

It must have been very rough, to tip her over the edge into this. "What happened?"

She sighed and was quiet so long he thought she wasn't going to answer, then she whispered words that were a spear to his heart.

"I joined the pack mind last night."

Aaryn's eyes closed and he fought not to growl. "Why? Mom? Why would you put yourself through that?"

She sighed. "I know you left with Elreth last night. And I thought… I thought she had taken you as Mate and I was so happy, Aaryn. I wondered if they were talking about it, that was all. I just wanted to be there, to share it with someone. That's all."

"What did they say?" he said through his teeth.

"They… um… it's okay, Aaryn. It wasn't anything I haven't heard before. I just… I had just forgotten what they can be like when they're angry, that's all. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine."

"You are not fine!" he snarled. "Tell me what they said, and who said it. I will deal with them."

"No, son, no. I really don't want you to do that. I'll just stay out of it. I know better. I should have thought… I was just excited for you, that's all." She took a deep breath and a tiny sob broke in her throat. "And you did take Elreth, didn't you—but why is it so faint?

Aaryn dropped his face in his hand. "The mating bond took, but we didn't… complete it," he said.

"Such a good male, just like your father," she said, rubbing his nearest arm. Her hands were dry and papery. "I'm so happy for you, Aaryn. I pray you'll have every happiness. Elreth is perfect for you."

"Thank you, Mom, but this… you're more important just now. Tell me what was said and I'll deal with it—or if I need get help, Elreth will. She loves you, too."

"I know, I know. But that's not it, Aaryn. I just… I really just need a rest. Some sleep and in a couple days I'll be fine."

No, no no no no. the longer she was here in the dark, the worse it would get.

"Mom, have you eaten yet today?"

"No, I'm not hungry."

"You need to eat. And drink. I'm going to bring you something. And we'll get some light in here so it's not so dark and heavy. I'm sorry I wasn't home last night to help you—"

"Don't be silly, Aaryn. I'm surprised you're here now. Why aren't you with your mate?"

His chest swelled at her words, and his stomach tightened. There's nowhere he'd rather be. Certainly not here. But he knew Elreth's days would always be busy. He was already accustomed to sharing her with being a Royal. Even their meals were usually taken separately since she was up at the head table… oh shit.

When they mated, he was going to have to sit up at the front in the market.

Shit.

"Aaryn?"

"Sorry, what?"

"Why aren't you with Elreth?"

"Oh, she has meetings today. We'll meet later. Have dinner and spend the evening… but you know what, I can come back here after dinner, Mom. It's okay. You shouldn't be alone."

"Don't be silly, Aaryn. You shouldn't be here being bored with me. Go get your mate and start making grandpuppies for me."

"Mom!"

"I'm serious," she said, smiling, which was a balm to his heart. She rarely smiled once she'd taken to her bed. "I'm not hungry. I probably just got a little bug or something. Leave me some water and let me sleep. I'll be fine. Go do… whatever it was you were going to do."

"No," he said firmly and got up from the bed. "I'm going to get you some food and a drink, then… what about if we play cards. We haven't done that for a long time. That would be nice, wouldn't it?"

It would break his heart. A large chunk of his childhood was made up of playing half-hearted games with his mother on this bed, or the small table in the corner because she couldn't bring herself to leave the room. And he didn't have any friends.

His stomach felt sick. Cold and sick.

"Aaryn, I really don't think—"

"I do, Mom," he said softly, stroking her hair back. She closed her eyes like a child and sighed. "I'll just go get you some things, then we'll rest here together, okay?"

"Okay," she said softly. "Thank you. You're a good son, Aaryn."

"It's okay, I love you, Mom."

"Love you too."