ELRETH

Aaryn stared at her, his chest heaving, his hair falling in his eyes, and his yearning was so obvious she almost laughed at the naked hunger in his eyes. Until their eyes met and her own desire reached for her, clawing at her belly.

"Oh, I get it," she said breathlessly.

"El—"

"No, no, you're right," she said, forcing herself to stand up and began buttoning her shirt. "We should go back to the cave. It will be much more comfortable, and besides who wants dirt up their ass crack when—"

"No, El," he said hoarsely, then cleared his throat. "I think… we need to wait."

"What? Why?" her fingers trembled because of the fire he'd lit in her, and he wanted to wait? She caught him staring at her chest and decided against buttoning the buttons after all, putting her hands on her hips instead.

His throat bobbed, but he yanked his eyes back up to her face and his jaw got hard in that way that meant he was going to be stubborn. She wanted to stamp a foot.

"When I was talking to your Dad—"

"I'm getting really, really sick of talking about my parents, Aaryn," she growled.

"—he had a good point. He said… he said he only scented the mating bond because he was looking for it. It's faint because we haven't… done it yet. But he reminded me that when we do, everyone's going to know. If we do this tonight, as soon as we leave the cave tomorrow it's out there, El. Are you ready for that? I don't think I am."

Her head jerked back. "You don't want people to know about us?"

"No! fuck, El… I'm talking about… no one's going to think you should mate me. You're Queen. That's never happened before that the Queen would outrank the King. They're going to think you should be with someone higher in the hierarchy. Someone who could take over if something happened to you. Not to mention, not a fucking disformed," he said bitterly, his hands clenching to fists.

A spear of cold shot through her gut—not because of what the people would think, but because of the utter rage and disgust that twisted his features when he said that. About himself.

She stepped into him immediately wrapping her arms around his waist. "I couldn't care less what they think, Aaryn, you and I both know you're plenty strong enough for me. And I couldn't think of anyone better to take over if something happened to me."

"I promise you, the people could."

"They think they could. You and I both know they're wrong."

He stared down at her, his lips still pressed thin. But at least he wasn't snarling at himself anymore. He sighed and wrapped his arms around her, too. "We can argue the merits later. The point is, if we walk out tomorrow mated and everyone can tell… it will be a disaster. Undermining your rule isn't worth it."

She was surprised at the little snap of pain in her chest when he said that. "I think it's worth it," she said, a little shaky. "I want you. I haven't felt this way before. I want to… have you. I want you to have me."

He groaned and closed his eyes for a moment. "I want that too, El. You have no idea. I didn't mean it wasn't worth being together. I meant… I think we'll regret throwing this particular cat among the chickens without thinking it through. I think tomorrow we could talk to the elders, your parents, get some support—"

"My parents again. I'm beginning to think it's not me you're in love with, Aaryn," Elreth grumbled.

He snorted. "Trust me, your father holds zero attraction to me."

"Good to know."

They both went quiet. Aaryn's eyes dropped to her chest again, and she waited, skin prickling to see if he was going to give up on this ridiculous plan to wait.

Instead, which was worse, he traced a single finger down her chest and circled first her breast, then her nipple, as he spoke.

"There is nothing I'd like more than to have you right now, Elreth. I've waited years…" he let the sentence trail off and his eyes went dark staring at her. Elreth held her breath in case he didn't say the "but" that she heard in his tone.

Then he thumbed the peak of her and her breath caught.

"But," he said, and she groaned, "I vowed to do what was best for you. And I'm convinced we need help with this, El. We wouldn't walk into the market in the morning to cheering and applause. We'd walk in to challenges, and a potential uprising if we aren't careful."

"They would not—"

"El, they don't do it to us when you're around, but there are people in the Anima who hate us. Really hate. It's… I don't know why—it's almost like they're afraid what we have is catching. But the point is, if those people get taken by surprise? If the only warning they get is a whispered word from someone else who hates us… it could go really bad, really fast. I think we need the elders—and yes, your parents—not only for advice, but to help us sway the people. I think…" he swallowed and looked at her nipple again like he was grieving the loss of it. "I think we need to wait until we walk the Flames and Smoke."

"What?!" she snapped. "That could take weeks!"

"Or days," he said, his jaw twitching. "But it might soothe some of the people who think you're breaking too many traditions—and it gives everyone time to get used to the idea, so hopefully they won't work against you."

"Aaryn, you're my true mate. That trumps tradition. No Anima is going to blame me for taking you—they'd think I was wrong not to!"

He nodded. "They might also think it should stop you being a dominant Female, though."

She blinked. She hadn't thought about that.

It was instinct to draw close to him, to wrap her arms around him and pull him in tight—because she suddenly felt like she was at risk of losing him.

She laid her temple on his chest, listened to his heart thud—far too rapidly, though she knew hers did the same—and sighed.

He pulled her in close and his heart sped up even faster. "I'm not letting you go, El. I vowed to do right by you. And I… I'm confident this is right. I refuse to be the reason the Anima revolt against you."

She sighed, but nodded. "I know you're right. I just hate the idea of waiting."

He chuckled darkly. "I promise you don't hate it as much as me. I'm talking to your parents tomorrow. We're walking the Flames and Smoke the day we get the elders behind us, if I have to drag the people there by their tails."

Elreth laughed, "Agreed," she said and snuggled into his chest.

A moment later his chest echoed with a tone that made her skin prickle. "You know, just because we're waiting to mate, doesn't mean we have to wait for everything…"