Nightfall Chapter 118

There was a nonsense-like truth that existed in the world: "Existence is the real being, so is nonexistence". It was very simple for the criterion of existence and nonexistence in the secular world. For instance, visible things like mountains were existent; audible things like sounds were existent; tangible things like fire were also existent. But if you could not see, hear, or feel it, then it was not nonexistent.

But that criterion could not be applied to the world of cultivation. The Breath, or Primordial Qi, filling the world and the Psyche Power, produced by the integration of the Ocean of Qi and the Mountain of Snow which caused the vibration of the Primordial Qi, could not be perceived by ordinary people. They were incapable of seeing, or hearing, or feeling the Breath of Nature and the Psyche Power of cultivators. But that did not mean that such things did not exist.

The Initial State, also known as the Initial Awareness State, referred to the psyche of cultivators that was output from the Ocean of Qi and Mountain of Snow to comprehend the existence of the Breath of Nature. The Perception State indicated that cultivators could still stay in harmony with nature, and could even have some sensory exchanges and contacts with it after being initially aware of its Breath. Both of the two initial states were collectively called the Unreal State.

Whether an ordinary person could embark on the way of cultivation could be easily judged by the above discussion. If he could see, or hear, or feel the Breath of Nature or the psyche, then he was really on the way.

Staring blankly at his trembling fingers, the thin gap between the pulps and wet towels, and the transpiring heat, Ning Que knew that what he felt was something else rather than the heat.

It was inaccurate to describe this kind of feeling with the word "touching"—it was more like a sense of perception.

Spirits existed in human brains. And spirits produced the psyche that referred to thoughts, while the Psyche Power was dying to be with you… Such enigmatic strength generated by these kinds of patterns were named the power of thoughts.

Ning Que was exhausted at this time, as he had not recovered from the serious injury. There were no distracting thoughts in his mind except for the idea that he would like to pick up that steaming wet towel to take a good wipe on his body.

It seemed that the Breath circulating between Heaven and Earth finally understood his thoughts and felt the power of his thoughts at this time. The Breath infiltrated from the eaves, the window, the comforter, and every drop of sweat and then converged in front of his fingers with a "Speed" beyond the range of speed, and then it finally fell on the hot wet towel.

…

…

Dead silence reigned in the room. Ning Que gazed at his fingers like the famous flower-addicted girl of Yuelun Kingdom, and he was afraid to breathe or blink. He had to ensure with his utmost strength that his trembling fingers would not shake into afterimages. So he kept that posture with this unprecedented precaution, as if he was a frozen quail.

After a long time, he gradually raised his eyebrows and slightly cocked his head like it was in slow motion, and glared at his fingertips with apprehension and anxiety. Then he slowly closed his eyes to forcibly suppress the excitement in his heart, and started to meditate.

After he got the Article on the Response of the Tao in Kaiping market many years ago, Ning Que had continued to meditate everytime and everywhere since then. He was involved in meditation before sleeping, while gazing at the sunrise after getting up, when feeling happy after winning three bowls of wine in gambling, and while staying in Shubi Lake after jumping into it with his whole bloody body. Though it was pathetic that he had never been aware of the flowing Primordial Qi, he was absolutely the most proficient at getting into the state of meditation.

Gone were all the thoughts.

Sticking to the heart.

Galloping with the mind.

Ning Que, whose acupoints and Ocean of Qi and Mountain of Snow within his body were blocked, and whose hopes had been destroyed countless times, finally heard or felt that long quiet Breath after spending 16 years in this world. It was the Breath of Heaven and Earth.

He dared to swear on his mother's reputation, who loved him the most in the General's Mansion, that while this long and quiet Breath was minor and slight, it was definitely the most wonderful sound that he had ever heard. It was more wonderful than the sound of the Horse Gang falling off their horses by Shubi Lake; than the sound of Zhang Yiqi struggling to move with his staring eyes; and even more wonderful than the sound of silver crashing together in the money bag.

There were stretched green leaves, blossoming flowers, tweeting birds, towering mountains, running waters, falling oranges in the islet, hundreds of competing boats, a broad land, and a spacious sky within the long and quiet Breath.

Ning Que did not know how to describe the beauty of the Breath. Perhaps only the weak breath that he heard those years ago could be comparable—that year he found little Sangsang, who was frozen to blue among the dead bodies by the roadside, and after holding her in his arms for the whole day and night, her weak breath was finally heard.

At that moment, he vaguely remembered the noises that were heard in the street when he was unconscious, and he realized their meanings—Those breaths coming from the hitching posts and sideboards of taverns along the streets; those breaths coming from the courtyard and old pagoda trees and green leaves beneath the seats; and those breaths coming from stone lions, wooden buildings, streets, palaces, and city walls were all the gifts given by Heaven and Earth.

What he heard was the Breath that was calm and long and moving toward the future from ancient times, and what he touched with his fingers were not material objects but their realities that could be determined. Though the doors and windows of the room were closed, he could still feel the gentle waves slowly swirling around him. No, these waves were more dignified than the wind. They were as gentle as a quiet lake and clean water, but nimbler than water.

He could no longer suppress the emotion pouring out of his heart when he finally confirmed what he perceived. He awakened. Peering at the scrolls written by him on the wall and looking at the simple beams and patterns, his eyes were filled with excitement, but an extremely complicated mood arose. He seemed to be able to see the gray wall and green trees in Lin 47th Street. Although the doors and windows were closed, and he knew that the present world looked the same as that in the past, but from this day on, the world… would definitely be different for him.

Ning Que reached out his shivering fingers to aim at the bean-shaped candlelight on the table, and took a slow breath to urge his psyche to get into the Ocean of Qi and Mountain of Snow. And it took a very long time before he gradually released it.

The candlelight on the table was disturbed. He was wondering if it was due to the wind, or his fingers, or his confused heart.

"Is… this the Qi of Heaven and Earth?"

He gazed at his fingertips, and nothing was seen. However, he could feel a piece of thin existence there, and he muttered to himself. Then he added in a low voice, "This is the Qi of Heaven and Earth!"

His tender face was full of determination and affirmation, without any hesitation or self-doubt.

…

…

Ning Que jumped off the bed without dressing a piece of clothing, and his shoes were not worn backward, because he had no shoes to wear. He felt weak at the knees and nearly fell, and he supported himself to run out of the room, knocking over the bucket beside the bed and severely hitting his waist by the corner of the table. However, the lad who was stricken to swoon by a great sense of happiness did not feel the pain at all.

He pushed open the door, rushed into the small courtyard, and stood in front of Sangsang, who was cutting firewood. Looking at the little handmaiden with her bent and small body, he opened his mouth and wanted to say something, only to find his voice was a little hoarse, and he was hardly able to speak.

Sangsang gave a puzzled glance at him and found his expression to be extremely weird, like he was either crying or laughing.

"Young master, are you all right?"

She stood up, standing on her tiptoes and raising her arms out of habit. She wondered whether Ning Que had caught a fever by covering himself up and whether he was in a confused state of mind. But she found that she could actually touch the top of his head when standing on her tiptoes, and then she could not help laughing happily.

Ning Que grabbed her skinny arms with his right hand to hug the little body into his arms, into his own naked arms, as he did many years ago. He murmured, "It's awesome that you are still alive, and I am… fine as well."

He had not cried for many years since fleeing away from Chang'an with the bloody hatchet. There were no tears today, but he did not know why he felt a bit warm and humid in his eyes, and a bit sour in his nose.

Sangsang looked up with difficulty and she was shocked by the slight moisture in Ning Que's eyes. Then she figured out something with a frightened expression on her small face, and then two lines of tears flowed out from her willowy eyes.

Silent speech was absolutely not enough to disperse the emotions of the master and handmaiden at that moment.

Sangsang opened his skinny arms and tightly grabbed Ning's waist, and burst into tears. "Hum… Young master, this is a great joy. You should eat several more pieces of duck meat tonight."

After the embrace ended, they separated. Ning Que looked down at the tears on the black face of the little handmaiden. His lips moved slightly as if he was about to say something, but after all, he did not say it out loud.

Sangsang immediately understood what he meant, and bowed her head in shame and wiped her tears off with her sleeves. She whispered, "I… I'm going to order takeout from the Building of Pines and Cranes, six taels of silver for noodles."

"Good girl." Ning Que rubbed her head dotingly.

Sangsang got into the house to take out the silver from the box and ran into the shop. Suddenly, she thought of one thing, and then she stopped in front of the door, and turned around to look at him, and said in earnest biting her lips, "Young master, if you go out next time… to do such dangerous things, remember to bring me with you. It's tormenting waiting here in the shop."

Ning Que looked at her quietly, and then nodded vigorously. "Don't worry. Such things won't happen again. At least this year, I won't do anything, and you don't need to worry."

…

…

The Old Brush Pen Shop was closed early today.

On the small wooden plaque hanging on the door, it had been written that "The owner is engaged", but Sangsang quickly changed it to "The owner had big days".

A happy event was not complete without drinking to add to the fun. The master and handmaiden extravagantly ate six taels of silver of noodles from the Building of Pines and Cranes and drank two pots of wine. Sangsang, who had an amazing capacity for wine and who never got drunk, was drunk today. Perhaps she was very glad indeed, or that she just regretted that the meal cost her so much money.

Watching little Sangsang, who was lying drunk on the table, Ning Que was wondering how she could have gotten drunk earlier than him, scratching his head in surprise.

He hugged Sangsang back to the room, covered her with a single layer of quilt, and fanned her with a round cattail-leaf fan sitting by the bed to drive away those annoying mosquitoes. It was Sangsang who had served him over all these years, and he hardly did such things. But he was really skilled since he had done them many times when he was a child.

The great sense of happiness and excitement gradually calmed down while he was waving the round cattail-leaf fan. He began to consider what had happened to him, with his eyesight subconsciously falling on the big black umbrella beside Sangsang's little face.