《Keyboard Immortal》Chapter 147: A Magical Flashlight
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Faced with a spear thrust that he couldn’t dodge, Zu An suddenly shouted out, “Whatcha’ looking at?”
At the same time, he flung his dagger straight toward Jia Zhengjing.
“I’m looking at you, shithead!”
Jia Zhengjing was stunned. He finally understood why Yuan Wendong would actually respond to Zu An’s remark at that critical moment in the Clans Tournament. Apparently, Zu An had honed his taunting skill to the level where it could be considered a true weapon!
But it was all too late. Watching as the dagger sank into his chest, Jia Zhengjing closed his eyes indignantly.
Goddamnit, how did things turn out like this!
You have successfully trolled Jia Zhengjing for 1024 Rage points!
Despite this, Zu An wasn’t faring much better. While Jia Zhengjing’s momentary lapse in attention allowed Zu An to adjust himself and avoid a fatal blow, he was still left with a deep puncture in his chest.
With laborious movements, he pried open Zhen Liumang’s hands and shook off his body before staggering over to Jia Zhengjing’s fallen corpse to retrieve Poisonous Prick. He made sure to confirm that the two of them were indeed dead before heaving a sigh of relief.
It was not his first life-and-death battle, but this was the first time things had ended in such a gruesome way.
Ah, just what sins have I committed to suffer such a fate? How great would it have been if I were still in my air-conditioned room, enjoying a cool cup of cola while playing my games? Why the hell did I have to transmigrate into this horrible world and fight so desperately for my life?
Zu An lay on the ground, panting heavily. It took a while before strength finally returned to his body. With a deep sigh, he began applying some restorative medicine onto his wounds to stop the bleeding.
It was fortunate that cultivators in this world had incredibly resilient bodies. Had it been in his previous life, the deep puncture wound in his chest would have probably killed him even before he could be transported to the hospital.
Zu An bandaged his wounds messily before beginning a sweep of the battlefield. Just as he had expected, neither of the two remaining assassins were carrying much money, or any ki stones.
It dawned on him then that it was meaningless for deathsworn soldiers like them to accumulate wealth. They were forced to take on dangerous missions in which they could very well lose their lives, so it was pointless for them to accumulate material possessions. Knowing this, they opted to trade whatever they had to raise their fighting prowess instead. At the very least, that would increase their chances of survival.
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In the end, to Zu An’s dismay, he only found some dry rations and restorative medicine. He had spent so much effort and resources on the traps he had constructed—he had used up his precious armor-piercing arrows and the hidden weapons Ji Xiaoxi had given him—but he got hardly anything in return. Heck, he hadn’t even earned that many Rage points either!
Just thinking about it made Zu An feel greatly aggrieved. He ran over to Jia Zhengjing’s body and stripped him of his soft armor. There was a cut and a hole in it, both caused by Zu An in the earlier battle, but it was otherwise undamaged. It could at least be considered barely usable.
It should be of a fairly decent quality, considering that a pinnacle fourth rank cultivator had been using it as a defensive tool. Just to be safe, Zu An grabbed another sword and tried hacking at the soft armor, and to his relief, it didn’t pierce through it at all.
His first thought was to wear the armor backwards, since both the cut and the puncture were only at the front of the armor. That way, the front of his body would still be fully protected.
On second thought, however, he felt that, if it ever came to a point where he would need this soft armor, it was highly likely that he would already be running away. In such a case, it would be more important for him to protect his back instead. So, he flipped the armor around and wore it the proper way.
Following that, he leaped into the pit to collect the armor-piercing arrows that hadn’t yet lost their lustre. All in all, four of them were still usable.
Besides these arrows, he also noticed a miniature hand crossbow in the pit, which appeared to belong to Zhen Liumang. It had probably fallen off his arm while he was falling into the pit.
Zu An attached the hand crossbow onto his wrist, and his aggravation finally alleviated a little. At least he managed to loot two usable pieces of equipment after that difficult fight, so it was not all that bad.
After taking whatever he could, Zu An headed over to a quiet location to take a look at the Rage points he had amassed thus far. He was initially planning to save up his Rage points so that he could use them up all at once, and maybe even get something good that way. However, after this latest near-death experience, he had finally come to understand the danger he was in, and he dared not to remain complacent anymore.
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Just like the deathsworn soldiers, he ought to convert all available resources he had into actual strength, so as to increase his chances of walking out of this dungeon alive.
To his astonishment, he had actually managed to amass a massive 75,873 Rage points!
There was no place to wash his hands and face right now, so he chose to rub his hands on the bloodstains covering his body instead, consoling himself that red was an auspicious color.
He began drawing the lottery. The light marker quickly shot across the keyboard before eventually stopping above the letter ‘D’.
*Ding!*
Congratulations, you have won a ‘Magical Flashlight’!
Zu An’s eyes slowly widened in disbelief. He never thought that he would actually manage to draw an artifact right away. Is Lady Luck finally shining on me now?
He quickly took a look at the description of the item.
Magical Flashlight: The greatest work of a bald scientist from another world.
Artifact Effect: It is able to light up in the presence of light without requiring any energy sources at all. Of course, this also meant that this flashlight would never light up in the absence of light. It’s rumored that this flashlight harnesses an incredible effect, but no one has been able to figure out its use for the past thousand years. Could you possibly be the exception? Uses: 3
Zu An could not believe what he was seeing.
His mind was completely blown after reading the description. For a flashlight to light up in the presence of light instead of the absence of it… What was bloody wrong with that scientist’s mind?
He was really wondering if that bald scientist was named Haw Kar-ying![1]
What shocked him more was that there was actually a limit to the number of times he could use this lousy piece of shit! Even if there were unlimited uses for this, he wouldn’t be able to find a place to put it to use at all!
Even more egregious was the fact that the description hinted at an incredible effect, but it refused to elaborate on what it was. What the hell? You might as well not say anything at all!
Zu An tried to think more deeply into it, but he couldn’t figure out a use for this flashlight at all. Therefore, he decided to just continue on with the lottery.
Perhaps he had used up too much of his luck on drawing the first artifact, because the next eighteen draws only gave him the ‘Thanks for playing!’ message.
Zu An’s eyelids twitched as he wondered if he had used up all of his luck. When he finally pulled a ki Fruit on his nineteenth pull, he heaved a sigh of relief.
However, all he got were ‘Thanks for playing!’ messages and Ki Fruits afterward, and his soul began to feel rather numb. It was like an endless, repetitive cycle.
All of a sudden, though, the light marker stopped on the letter ‘Y’. Zu An froze for a moment, wondering if he was seeing things. When was the last time I managed to draw two items in one sitting?
He was so used to having horrible luck that this sudden outburst of fortune caught him off guard. He hurriedly checked the details.
Congratulations on drawing ‘Befriend a Rich Man’!
Befriend a Rich Man: When you reach a certain level of wealth, your appearance, age, personality, and all other superficial traits will be rendered meaningless. Everyone will think of you as an amicable man overflowing with charisma.
Artifact Effect: Every time you spend 100,000,000 coins, you’ll be able to make a target view you as a friend. This effect lasts for an hour.
1. This is a character from the film From Beijing With Love, a 1994 Hong Kong spoof of James Bond. There was a scientist in the film (named Da Vinci but transliterated to Cantonese) who created a solar-powered flashlight, which lights up in the presence of light.
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