《Love Code at the End of the World》Book 5, Chapter 22 - Truth
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Xing Chuan frowned slightly. "Are you holding a grudge against me because you think I didn’t save Harry?"
I coldly turned back to look in front of me. "This is war. Sacrifices are inevitable. But I believe that if it was He Lei, he absolutely wouldn't have let Harry die!" I cast a sidelong glare at Xing Chuan. Harry died under his command. I hated him!
Xing Chuan fixed his gaze on me for a long while, before he finally looked down. "If hating me makes you feel better, I am willing to let you hate me."
I stalked past him and entered the spaceship. Stepping through the spaceship’s entrance, I made a decision. I was going to participate in the war. No one was allowed to stop me!
Silver Moon City was extremely quiet when we got back, as though the very air had frozen the moment I exited the spaceship. As I walked out from the spaceship, the people standing on both sides lowered their heads in unison, welcoming back to Silver Moon City in silence.
I didn't feel anything. I didn't feel excitement at everyone welcoming me nor did I feel honored by everyone's admiration. I didn't feel anything at all.
At the end of the path were Raffles, He Lei and the other members of the knight group.
I didn't meet He Lei or the others’ astonished gazes, only continued to walk forward step after step.
"Lil Bing!" Raffles ran to me. I didn't stop my steps. "I am tired. I want to go back and rest.” I strode right past Raffles. Don't even think that Steel Ghost City was enough to dispel my anger!
Because the one that had killed Harry was this godd*mn war! This godd*mn world!
As long as the war didn't end, my revenge wouldn't be complete.
I lay on the bed and stared blankly at the ceiling. Slowly, I closed my eyes.
I didn't know how long I’d slept for. When I woke up, I heard the soft noise of pages flipping.
He flipped the pages as gently as though he was touching a woman he loved.
"I want to participate in the war," I said right away.
He didn't reply. A long silence stretched in the room.
"Luo Bing, we have been studying your superpower all this while," he said. "We are scientists. Once we learned that you can absorb blue crystal energy, we’d already speculated that you can release it too."
It turned out that they’d already known. Heh, even Xing Chuan seemed a little stupid before Cang Yu. As expected of those scientists. Cang Yu was a scientist too, after all.
"I want to participate in the war," I sat up and repeated.
He remained quiet for a moment. Then, he leaned forward slightly and waved his hand before me. Rays of light converged to form a three-dimensional holograph of Steel Ghost City.
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A sharp pain stabbed my heart. I averted my eyes from the sight. "Why are you showing me this? I don't want to see this."
"This is Steel Ghost City before you wiped it out. Now, it looks like this." Out of the corner of my eyes, I saw Cang Yu wave his hand again. When I turned to look, my heart ached. Before me was a flatland that resembled a radiation zone. There were no signs of life at all, it was just a dead piece of flatland. Only the broken arms outside the circle showed that there had once been a city here.
"We speculated that your releasing of blue crystal energy would be like a small explosion, but that was merely a speculation. We didn't conduct any experiments on you. Firstly, we were afraid that you would resist. Secondly, we were not certain how strong your destructive power is. Now, judging from your destructive power, Luo Bing, I will not allow you to participate in the war." Every word of Cang Yu’s sounded calm and steady.
I didn't speak. Even though he didn't agree, I would still go. No one could stop me!
"Luo Bing, you wiped out Steel Ghost City. You’ve proved your superpower. You’ve taken revenge for Harry. But now Steel Ghost City is completely useless to us..." He pressed on my shoulder gently. "There are hardly any cities left that are suitable for living in this world. Steel Ghost City is now left with strong radiation. Are you sure that you want to destroy the remaining half of the planet?"
I was stunned. I looked at Cang Yu, whose expression was solemn yet held heartache. "I know that you are in pain. Steel Ghost City alone wasn’t enough to dispel your pain. But think about what Harry would want. He wouldn't want to see you like this..." He touched my face tenderly, tucking my long hair behind my ears. "Do you remember what Harry said? He wanted to safeguard your kindness. Luo Bing, don't get eaten up by hatred. Don't be assimilated by the people here..."
I felt a tug on my heart. Looking down, I fought to hold back my tears.
He gently touched my long hair. "I sent Raffles to keep you company. Harry is no longer here. You have to think about the people who are still alive..." Standing up from my bedside, he walked out of my room without another word.
In the living room, he said something to Raffles, who then rushed in to sit by my side. He pulled my tensed body into his arms. "Lil Bing, don't be this way. Don't act this way..." he choked with sobs. "Harry is dead. All of us are heartbroken. I don't even know how to inform Sis Ceci..." His tears wet my face...
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Gradually I came back to reality. How was I going to tell Sis Ceci and Uncle Mason?
"But Harry definitely didn't want to see you like this. Don't kill any more people... Don't kill any more people, okay...?"
"They are not people! They are demons! They are beasts!" I became emotional again. The memory of Jun telling me not to kill anymore too resurfaced in my mind.
"Lil Bing... Harry wanted to safeguard your smile and your kindness. Now that he's no longer here, I have to protect you on his behalf... I won't leave you. Everyone's morale has been boosted because of you. It is only a matter of time until we win victory in this war. This way we’re taking revenge for Harry as well..." Raffles hugged me tightly. His choking voice expressed his own pain and sorrow over Harry's death.
My tears flowed down again. Slowly I hugged Raffles back and buried myself in his chest. We were like two surviving family members who had been left behind in this world. We hugged each other for a long time, wanting to find warmth in each other's arms.
Harry has died...
We have to accept the heartbreaking reality.
But Raffles...
Is still alive.
I can't let Raffles worry about me and be sad for me...
"I'm sorry..."
"Lil Bing, it's great that you’ve finally calmed down..." He wiped his tears and continued to hold me. "His Highness Cang Yu didn't lie to you. Your damaging power is shocking and truly damaging to a city in a livable zone. Steel Ghost City has become another radiation zone now..."
I started to calm down. After venting my emotions, the anger that had filled my head to bursting had finally begun to subside. In Raffles’ embrace, I felt like I was gradually waking up.
"Another radiation zone?" I wiped my tears and glanced at the Steel Ghost City that I’d wiped out.
"Yes, your cleansing ability is far behind your destructive power. That is also the reason why His Highness Cang Yu doesn't agree to you participating in the war. The cities that the Ghost Eclipsers have conquered are precious livable zones in this world. Originally, once we conquered Steel Ghost City, Silver Moon City could have built their foundation camp in Steel Ghost City. But now, it's impossible..." Raffles looked down and sighed with a heavy heart.
My head throbbed with pain. My hatred that had eaten me up had swallowed the city too...
"However, His Highness Cang Yu said that although it can’t be used as a base camp, it can still be a new barrier. At least we won’t have to worry that the Ghost Eclipsers would return. The shore across Steel Ghost City hasn’t been polluted by your radiation so they can build their base camp there instead. Although it’ll take more time, since originally they had planned to take over a ready-built city.”
Suddenly, I felt apologetic towards Cang Yu as well as the entire war plan.
However, I still didn't regret wiping out Steel Ghost City. If I was given the chance again, I would destroy it without hesitation in order to take revenge on Harry's behalf!
Because I was a soldier! I wasn’t Mother Mary!
"Oh yeah. His Highness Cang Yu seems to know that you are a girl..." Raffles mentioned mildly. I glanced at him and he became worried. "When he saw you, he didn't look surprised, unlike the others. From his expression... he seems to have long known that you are a girl..."
I suddenly recalled Nora's phantom. Had she been trying to tell me that Cang Yu knew that I was a girl?
"Rest well for the next few days. Don't worry about Xing Chuan bothering you because His Highness Cang Yu imprisoned him." Raffled held my hand and let me lean on his shoulder.
I was surprised. "Imprisoned?"
"Yes. You lost control because of Harry's... death..." Raffles paused. Taking a calming breath, he continued, "The last person who was with Harry was Xing Chuan, so His Highness Cang Yu reckoned that Xing Chuan held responsibility for Harry's death. It is not only because of you, but also because Harry was Silver Moon City's important metahuman and general..." Raffles' eyes turned red again. He looked away. "I'm sorry. I haven't accepted the reality yet. I know I shouldn't become weak when you are hurting but I grew up with Harry. We..."
"I know... I know..." I hugged Raffles tightly. I knew how close he was with Harry. Although they were always arguing, they were family after all.
Raffles wasn’t feeling any less pained than I was over Harry's death. Harry had left us so suddenly that we couldn't accept it.
Raffles calmed down and wiped his tears. "Xing Chuan being imprisoned by His Highness Cang Yu is also because we’ve suffered severe injury from the war. We’ve lost one third of our military power and equipment from the attack on Steel Ghost City. Hence, after Steel Ghost City, the upcoming war would be very difficult on us. His Highness Cang Yu has already decided to stop the war temporarily. Now, we will make use of Steel Ghost City's radiation zone to build a new defense line. We will rest up and recover behind the defense line."
I nodded. Although I’d wiped out Steel Ghost City and boosted the soldiers' morale, they couldn't advance just yet due to insufficient military power.
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