I am from Buffalo. That's about the furthest you can possibly get from whatever Wuxia-or-Xianxia world this is. So how did I end up here? No idea. All I know is I have three goals. Number three, stay alive. Number two, don't get killed. Number one, eat all the delicious food. 

I'm just trying to do my part as the small-business owner of my restaurant. Please tell me how to stop getting tangled up with arrogant acolytes, demon princes, veiny, long-nailed witches, and apocalyptic conspiracies...

Be warned, this story has some violence.